Why does this always happen to me?

[fitgirl]

meaning? he knocks down your door and pursues you? congratz, I hate that.

 

meaning he's nice. good on the inside. he was shy at first and i did half the pursuing.

[buster2209]

To the OP, you sound like you have a destructive personailty.

 

My advice, stop pursuing guys right now, tell the ones who are pursuing you to piss off and try to figure out why you want what you can't have and why what you have you don't want.

 

And yeah, I'm a guy. There was nothing complicated about what I wrote was there.......

 

Why are guys so complicated?

[Brendan Brady]

Guys I have no attraction to being overly friendly. I'm not saying this guy likes me, but he likes all my status updates and always IMs me and I have no attraction to him and that never changes. When I don't like a guy, it never changes.

 

the only guys I have ever been attracted to, don't like me like that and this one says it's not because of my looks, either. He says it's cause I'm looking for something more serious. Well yeah! I like him, so duh!

 

I'm just so fed up with guys I have no interest in being so friendly. It's like, um, back up dude.

 

He just sent me a link to a zombie love song. I don't know if that means anything, but in my experience, the less interest you show in a guy, the more he wants you. And I don't play that game. If I'm not interested, I'm NOT interested and it doesn't change and vice versa.

 

Why are guys so complicated?

 

I can tell you why most people feel like that and how it eventually changes.

 

I'm guessing you had a strong unrequited love early on? (Someone you were really hung up on who didn't want you back.) And I'm guessing this was probably your first experience of love - rather than having a boyfriend all through school?

 

Well now you associate THAT feeling with what love/attraction's meant to feel like, so when it isn't there, you're not attracted to someone. And this can be a problem. You'll keep seeking out unavailable people.

 

And what eventually happens, to girls, is you'll probably get to an age where the desire for kids outweighs the desire of finding 'real love' (you might even be completely disillusioned with the idea by then) and you'll start selecting guys purely on prospects.

 

This isn't ideal either, and it's something you can break out of.

 

What I'd like to know is, using all your imagination, what would it take for this guy (or any guy) you're not interested in to start to become attractive to you? No matter how unrealistic.

 

Hi btw!

[DreamerGirl27]

I can tell you why most people feel like that and how it eventually changes.

 

I'm guessing you had a strong unrequited love early on? (Someone you were really hung up on who didn't want you back.) And I'm guessing this was probably your first experience of love - rather than having a boyfriend all through school?

 

Well now you associate THAT feeling with what love/attraction's meant to feel like, so when it isn't there, you're not attracted to someone. And this can be a problem. You'll keep seeking out unavailable people.

 

And what eventually happens, to girls, is you'll probably get to an age where the desire for kids outweighs the desire of finding 'real love' (you might even be completely disillusioned with the idea by then) and you'll start selecting guys purely on prospects.

 

This isn't ideal either, and it's something you can break out of.

 

What I'd like to know is, using all your imagination, what would it take for this guy (or any guy) you're not interested in to start to become attractive to you? No matter how unrealistic.

 

Hi btw!

 

Not a lot, sad to say. when I'm not interested, I'm not interested. He could maybe get plastic surgery and try and look like someone else. Everyone has their preference in regards to looks. I'm not different than anyone else. Usually when I'm not interested in a guy it's just because of -500% attraction. I have never dated a guy I had -500% attraction to, but I've also never dated a guy I was totally and completely attracted to, physically, either. They've been somewhere in the middle.

 

That, I'm fine with. It's the ones that I'm so far the opposite direction of attractiveness that I can't stand it. Those are the only types of guys that have been going for me recently.

 

I kind of want experience dating a guy I'm totally smitten by looks wise. Just for kicks and to say I did it.

 

Not saying I'll be with him forever, just saying I kinda wanna do that.

 

Anyway...yeah, I have had experience with unrequited love. Not early on, like, recently. Like still kind of in it, recently. I was head over heels for a guy. I think I'm gettin' over it.

 

I've had a few instances with unrequited love actually. And it's usually with the player type. Guys are notorious for being more rebellious than girls at young ages and I hate that. Makes me not wanna know what my SO has done in his past should I ever actually find a soul mate.

 

So anyway...there's not much a guy I have said flat out "no, I don't like you like that" can do. I never have to say that, because I don't let it get that far, I usually just stop responding to them and they get the hint.