mulligan3447 Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 Hello everyone. I could sure use some advice. I met a wonderful man and he treated me like a lady at all times. We have been in a relationship for only a month...and it was wonderful until last Saturday. We were out for dinner and I had too much too drink (not using that as an excuse BTW)...and out of the blue I was just nasty to him. I told him in not too many pleasant words ..where to go....and I also listed everything I would NOT do for him. It was out of the blue...we were not fighting or upset. I think I may have done this unintentionally out of my own fear or insecurity of getting hurt...almost like sabatoging the relationship. Well that I did. We were not fighting and I just turned on him out of the blue. He is not sure, if he wants to see me anymore...actually we are off for now...and he said he would think about it. I really cannot blame him. I apologized - using no excuses - and told him if I were awarded another chance that I would fight very hard to earn the trust and respect back. I am so shocked by my behavior...very out of character for me..but I cannot turn back time. I have searched my soul to figure out why I would have been so dumb as to hurt such a wonderful man. Is there anything else I can do..other than to respect his wishes of needing space? I sent him an apology letter - not using any excuses and also phoned him to apologize in person. He was very polite and just said he was not sure. Has anyone had a similar situation at the beginning of their relationship that actually worked out in the long run? Has anyone had such a bad beginning but now have a wonderful relationship? Usually relationships go smooth at the beginning..this one was until I got so rude one night. Any advice would help! I know I was wrong .....I just miss him so much:-(( Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 I've had a drunken FIASCO or two of my own. I don't know why the hell it happens. It seems like a plan at the time. You've apologized....that's all you can do. And all I can do is sympathize with you. I DO believe some people sabotage their own life though.....and alcohol is a great cohort. Link to post Share on other sites
MarKus Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 Hmmm Sorry to hear that....you kinda shot yourself in the foot....so what made you say these horrible things to him if he was such a wonderful man, how much did you like him during your relationship. I dont know what you can do.....but you have apologised which is good and spoken to him....now i think all you can do now is wait and see Link to post Share on other sites
Author mulligan3447 Posted April 20, 2004 Author Share Posted April 20, 2004 Exactly...great question! What made me say those things? I honestly do not have a clue. I have had drinks before and have never acted that way...so I am not blaming the alcohol. To be honest, if I had to take a shot in the dark...it was almost as if he was too good to be true and it freaked me out. I was waiting for the other shoe to drop perhaps. I really do not know. I really like him alot...I fell hard...and he treated me wonderfully...he was a perfect gentleman at all times, took interest in what I had to say or was doing, was thoughtful, courteous, etc etc...he is the closest man to perfection (in my mind) that I have met and it scared me. You know how we all have these mental checklists of who or how our perfect mate would be like...he had check marks down my entire list. I have never had that. I am such an idiot and now I pay the ultimate price. I really hope somehow he can forgive me in time...but he was really hurt. Thank you for replying...I cannot do anything more than I have and need to give him his space. Those are his wishes :-(( Link to post Share on other sites
reggio Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 Well you've apologized and that is all you can do. You should consider staying off the booze though, just a thought. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 Drinking alcohol for a woman does not always have the same end result. You can be having a bad day, having a harmone change or any number of things which can swing the pendulum either way. Generally, I have a VERY good time. There ARE those few quirky times in the 'hidden files' of my brain though. Funny enough, I live in a really wild sailor town. Several of us went out. The bar was nutsy. I GOT THROWN OUT for being rowdy in a room full of drunk sailors!!!!! I was soooo embarrassed the next Monday....and had to face them at work. It's been almost a year and I STILL hear about it!!! My kids know, my family knows.....it's a horrible memory I will never live down. Not to mention I'm not allowed to go back there. HAHAHAHA! Try changing what you are drinking....so you'll perhaps drink less of it. As far as this guy...who knows if he'll end up understanding. Link to post Share on other sites
MarKus Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 Ahhh the things people do when there drunk Anyway.....i think you have done all you can for now Link to post Share on other sites
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