Girlfriends body seriously grossing me out.

[Rinas]

The last GUY I used to see was 5 ft 8 and he weighted 160 lbs! And this is a GUY! And he was pretty toned and buff. This woman is shorter than him and she weighs more!

 

I am not one of those women who like to side with the "Fat Chick" because I'm NOT a fat chick and I also realize that sexual attraction is important.

 

Your posts here indicate that you feel that looks are important, and that you admit to being very picky on physical traits. However, your other thread indicates that you don't date attractive men?

 

I don't mean to come off as rude here, while I agree that being healthy and in-shape matters, but the world can only get so vain.

 

I feel that those who have the need to look down upon others in such a way, must have many insecurities of their own.

[Lady vs Panda]

If she is this lazy about losing weight even when she has someone encouraging her, I can only imagine what other aspects of the relationship she will be lazy about in the future. Wow, just imagine if you get her pregnant! Yikes!

.

 

I'm not all about fat people and I'm not attracted to them myself, but I have no idea what this has to do with anything. There are plenty of fat people who are good parents, all over the world.

[Fondue]

I don't date right now period because I don't WANT a bf; I have no room for a man in my life. If I wanted someone to sleep with it would only be a good looking man. In general I think good looking men are more likely to cheat; that may have been what I said.

 

My personal life is not the point. The POINT is that 180 lbs on a 5 ft 6 woman is HIGHLY unattractive and anyone who defends this weight range is delusional.

 

It's not politically correct to admit that it's unattractive so many people (especially women who always feel they have to be nice and supportive of each other) like to make excuses for it. Or they think it's acceptable. They are afraid to say that it is unattractive (although they may think so on the inside).

 

Well, I am not afraid to state the truth; it's HIGHLY unattractive unless the guy has a BBW fetish (and some do!). However, the majority of men do not.

 

This woman weighs more than the average guy. Many guys don't even weigh over 180 lbs. None of my ex-bf's weighed over 180 lbs.

Yah, 180 on 5'8'' is pretty damn huge. It doesn't sound like it on numbers, but when I considered it comparing to myself, I'm rather stunned. Being 6'2'' and 180lbs, knowing that someone potentially is 6 inches shorter and having the same poundage simply makes me wonder how wide this lady is...

 

EDIT: With that said, there are plenty of men that would find her attractive. Beauty is subjective. Just 'cause you and I wouldn't dig someone of that size, doesn't mean someone else isn't gonna be all over it.

[somedude81]

Letting oneself become obese shows a lack of discipline.

 

Also, children are more likely to become obese if a parent is.

[stillafool]

Boosting your ego is not the job of other people. It's not their mission in life. As I said, if she is not someone you wish to walk through life with as she is, then don't.

 

I agree. Obviously if your ego is the most important thing to you, find a girl who lives up to that. Your current GF deserves to be with someone who will love and support her no matter what, especially if she decides to marry. Having children will/might add on more weight and she will need support. Find another girl now for your current gf's sake.

[Rinas]

I've seen numerous women who could carry a higher weight and still look fabulous.

 

While I believe that said weight is unhealthy, it would be the only reason why I would tell someone to lose weight. Health issues above all.

 

We are all human, we can't be expected to look to perfection. This is where we are all flawed, we all have such high standards, yet we don't take the time to look at ourselves.

 

Sorry, but the average person does not look like they are on a magazine cover. And lets face it, even those on such covers are airbrushed.

 

Time to come back into reality.

 

Yes, the weight isn't the most attractive, but would I consider them to be 'nasty' or 'highly unappealing'? No.

 

We are all flawed, time to start accepting it.

[stillafool]

That is bs. It is very possible to love someone and be repulsed by there body. I love her personality. I love her face. But those two things cannot make me love fat. I never have i never will.

 

Then leave her.

[Fondue]

Then leave her.

The better answer is to simply continue sleeping with her face?

 

[Lady vs Panda]

Letting oneself become obese shows a lack of discipline.

 

Also, children are more likely to become obese if a parent is.

 

There's no such thing as a perfect parent. Sometimes people with too much discipline are way too rigid and never show love...see, I can make all kinds of weird generalizations. And I'm pretty sure there are abusive skinny parents out there in the world, who set bad examples for their kids by smoking or drinking or having a crappy go-nowhere job...

 

If you are overweight that really has nothing to do with whether you can be a good parent. Definitely not to the point where you see somebody has gained too much weight, and you gasp and say OMG what if they ever have a baby?! What a nightmare that would obviously be!

 

I mean come on, that's ridiculous.

[somedude81]

There's no such thing as a perfect parent. Sometimes people with too much discipline are way too rigid and never show love...see, I can make all kinds of weird generalizations. And I'm pretty sure there are abusive skinny parents out there in the world, who set bad examples for their kids by smoking or drinking or having a crappy go-nowhere job...

 

If you are overweight that really has nothing to do with whether you can be a good parent. Definitely not to the point where you see somebody has gained too much weight, and you gasp and say OMG what if they ever have a baby?! What a nightmare that would obviously be!

 

I mean come on, that's ridiculous.

When I said that a person who is obese lacks discipline, I was talking only about themselves. I was not talking about whether or not they would be a good parent.

 

The only parenting thing I mentioned is that if a person is overweight, they are more likely to have overweight children than a parent who is not.

[Rinas]

People who are unattractive or average like to make themselves feel good by thinking that no one is "really looks that good". Maybe they don't look picture perfect, but there are people in REAL LIFE that come pretty damn close to it.

 

Sorry to dissapoint you, but I'm not unappealing. I am also a thin woman with a nice body. I am 5'3 and only 90-100 pounds. Do I have flaws? Sure, everyone does. I am far from unattractive.

 

I feel that those who are overly focused on looks have many insecurities that they need to work on. People may look at themselves and think they've reached perfection, but sorry not everyone will see them that way.

 

Even some of the most beautiful people will never reach perfection. Why you ask? Because there is no such thing.

 

Every human being has flaws, whether it be physical or emotional. Time to accept them and stop competing for perfection.

 

Lets not forget that we all age too. To those who are vain, I sure hope that they can accept wrinkles, or they'll have troubles looking in the mirror over time.

 

We waste so much time trying to be "perfect". We could be using that time to embrace our flaws and love what we've got.

[TheCoolest]

There's no such thing as a perfect parent. Sometimes people with too much discipline are way too rigid and never show love...see, I can make all kinds of weird generalizations. And I'm pretty sure there are abusive skinny parents out there in the world, who set bad examples for their kids by smoking or drinking or having a crappy go-nowhere job...

 

If you are overweight that really has nothing to do with whether you can be a good parent. Definitely not to the point where you see somebody has gained too much weight, and you gasp and say OMG what if they ever have a baby?! What a nightmare that would obviously be!

 

I mean come on, that's ridiculous.

 

He didn't say that being overweight made you an abusive parent. He said that being overweight will make your kids overweight. That is true. If your house is filled with junk food that is what your kids will eat. If your house is filled with health food then thats what your kids eat.

 

If you sit at home and watch tv that is what your kids will do.

If you are active then your kids will be active to. Get it?

[Rinas]

OP I sympathize with you that you are unattracted to your girlfriend at her current weight. However, the way you are going about it is very negative.

 

You need too sit her down and tell her your thoughts instead of writing about how nasty her body is here.

 

Make a plan to work out with her. At least let her know how you feel, so if she isn't on the same page, she can leave.

[chuckles11]

OP I sympathize with you that you are unattracted to your girlfriend at her current weight. However, the way you are going about it is very negative.

 

You need too sit her down and tell her your thoughts instead of writing about how nasty her body is here.

 

Make a plan to work out with her. At least let her know how you feel, so if she isn't on the same page, she can leave.

 

This is at least the second time someone has written a post like this. The OP is here seeking candid advice on how to solve a problem that exists within his relationship. In order to get candid advice, he needs to speak candidly about the problem that he is having. He is posting anonymously and no one here knows his girlfriend. Whether you feel it is "right" for him to feel as he does or not, he is not hurting his girlfriend by posting here unless he shows her this post or leaves this webpage up where she can find it.

[Lady vs Panda]

He didn't say that being overweight made you an abusive parent. He said that being overweight will make your kids overweight. That is true. If your house is filled with junk food that is what your kids will eat. If your house is filled with health food then thats what your kids eat.

 

If you sit at home and watch tv that is what your kids will do.

If you are active then your kids will be active to. Get it?

 

You don't have to talk to me like I'm the fat girlfriend you lie to and look down on. FYI, I know plenty of skinny people who are not active and sit around and watch tv. My skinny sister eats Taco Bell like 5x a week and my fat cousin eats all organic and tons of salads and fruits. Your fat girlfriend eats too much junk food, okay. I guess that was your problem when you were a fat guy, too. But even you can't look at fat people and automatically know they're going to be crappy parents, or that they're going to stuff their kids full of crappy food. My reading comprehension isn't worse than yours, or did you miss the post I was actually responding to where the poster clutched her pearls at the thought of a fat woman having a baby?

 

As for your own problem, a hundred people here have pretty much answered it for you. Stop lying to her that you love her no matter what, and tell her the truth. Maybe she will get fit again, or maybe you will break up, either way at least you won't be grossed out anymore. The end.

[Rinas]

This is at least the second time someone has written a post like this. The OP is here seeking candid advice on how to solve a problem that exists within his relationship. In order to get candid advice, he needs to speak candidly about the problem that he is having. He is posting anonymously and no one here knows his girlfriend. Whether you feel it is "right" for him to feel as he does or not, he is not hurting his girlfriend by posting here unless he shows her this post or leaves this webpage up where she can find it.

 

I gave advice. I stated that he should sit her down and tell her how he feels about her weight. They can then decide to work on it, or breakup if she is unhappy.

 

He's just going to end up with resentment by holding it inside and complaining, it was reasonable to tell him to talk about it with her.

 

Sorry that you did not see my post in that way. Whichever way you look at the thread, it still falls down to being negative.

[cheergirl]

I think it would be cruel of him to say something like “You gross me out” I even think it would be uncalled for to say “I don’t want to date you because being as fat as you are is unattractive” I even think it would be drama to just say “I’m un-attracted to you” and leave it at that.

Nobody's talking about being that stupid, but certainly get to the point and soon...Let's face it, whatever he says there's probably going to be drama

 

I agree, it's also demeaning to women that they are little babies who have to be spoon fed only affirming thoughts. Any group of people who was truly that hypersensitive and fragile shouldn't be trusted with any kind of adult responsibility.EXACTLY

 

 

My personal life is not the point. The POINT is that 180 lbs on a 5 ft 6 woman is HIGHLY unattractive and anyone who defends this weight range is delusional.

It's not politically correct to admit that it's unattractive so many people (especially women who always feel they have to be nice and supportive of each other) like to make excuses for it. Or they think it's acceptable. They are afraid to say that it is unattractive (although they may think so on the inside).

 

Well, I am not afraid to state the truth; it's HIGHLY unattractive unless the guy has a BBW fetish (and some do!). However, the majority of men do not.

This woman weighs more than the average guy. Many guys don't even weigh over 180 lbs. None of my ex-bf's weighed over 180 lbs.

AGREED; IT FEELS LIKE A CONSPIRACY OF SILENCE

Yah, 180 on 5'8'' is pretty damn huge. It doesn't sound like it on numbers, but when I considered it comparing to myself, I'm rather stunned. Being 6'2'' and 180lbs, knowing that someone potentially is 6 inches shorter and having the same poundage simply makes me wonder how wide this lady is...

 

EDIT: With that said, there are plenty of men that would find her attractive. Beauty is subjective. Just 'cause you and I wouldn't dig someone of that size, doesn't mean someone else isn't gonna be all over it.

Sadly, not her intended

 

The better answer is to simply continue sleeping with her face?:bunny::lmao:

 

 

OP I sympathize with you that you are unattracted to your girlfriend at her current weight. However, the way you are going about it is very negative.

 

You need too sit her down and tell her your thoughts instead of writing about how nasty her body is here.

 

Make a plan to work out with her. At least let her know how you feel, so if she isn't on the same page, she can leave.

or do something to start getting the weight off....

 

It's like if most men in the US were alcoholics,and you were determined not to marry one. Your dad wan't one nor was your mum... You notice your fiance starts drinking more and more. You drop hints, nothing, but everyone says "Youmustn't mention his drinking because it will upset him"

You have 2 choices, upset him by telling him the truth and your standards and expectations, or you marry a drunk... that's all Coolest...

[cheergirl]

This is at least the second time someone has written a post like this. The OP is here seeking candid advice on how to solve a problem that exists within his relationship. In order to get candid advice, he needs to speak candidly about the problem that he is having. He is posting anonymously and no one here knows his girlfriend. Whether you feel it is "right" for him to feel as he does or not, he is not hurting his girlfriend by posting here unless he shows her this post or leaves this webpage up where she can find it.

that's actually a good idea...

[TheCoolest]

You don't have to talk to me like I'm the fat girlfriend you lie to and look down on. FYI, I know plenty of skinny people who are not active and sit around and watch tv. My skinny sister eats Taco Bell like 5x a week and my fat cousin eats all organic and tons of salads and fruits. Your fat girlfriend eats too much junk food, okay. I guess that was your problem when you were a fat guy, too. But even you can't look at fat people and automatically know they're going to be crappy parents, or that they're going to stuff their kids full of crappy food. My reading comprehension isn't worse than yours, or did you miss the post I was actually responding to where the poster clutched her pearls at the thought of a fat woman having a baby?

 

As for your own problem, a hundred people here have pretty much answered it for you. Stop lying to her that you love her no matter what, and tell her the truth. Maybe she will get fit again, or maybe you will break up, either way at least you won't be grossed out anymore. The end.

K but why umad though? Lol take a chill pill. I was trying to explain to you his way of thinking not be condescending. So idk why umad but umad though. I don't know what post you're talking about but the post you quoted was speaking nothing but truth.

 

Of course there are skinny people who don't work out and eat junk. They are called ectomorphs. Its genetic so there ectomorph kids probably won't get fat either.

 

And yea there are fat people who eat health food but they aren't in the majority. The majority of fat people are fat for a reason. That reason is called laziness. They are weak. Not trying to bag on fat people i could care less if someone is fat or not that is there personal choice. And just because someone is fat that doesn't make them a bad parent. But if there kids pick up on there habits yes it will make there kids fat. There is exceptions to every rule but the rules is there for a reason.

[alexlakeman]

Just start distancing yourself from her, so to have time to look for a hotter body, but still have her and not be alone..

 

I went through the same thing when I was married; we both worked out, in shape, then she started blowing up... one thing led to another and her overweight was one of the conditions of our divorce... I basically told her and have practice the following "If I take the time to work out and stay in shape, I expect my significant other to do the same"...

 

I am actually in a similar dilemna myself at the moment. Met a hot woman, great personaility, pretty, small waist size..etc.. but when she undressed, YIKES!!!!!!!! stretch marks and some left over fat from when she was pregnant a load of years ago... So you haven't seen anything yet, wait till the g/f gets pregnant, she will likely end up fatter than she is now when she has the baby...

[TheCoolest]

Just start distancing yourself from her, so to have time to look for a hotter body, but still have her and not be alone..

 

I went through the same thing when I was married; we both worked out, in shape, then she started blowing up... one thing led to another and her overweight was one of the conditions of our divorce... I basically told her and have practice the following "If I take the time to work out and stay in shape, I expect my significant other to do the same"...

 

I am actually in a similar dilemna myself at the moment. Met a hot woman, great personaility, pretty, small waist size..etc.. but when she undressed, YIKES!!!!!!!! stretch marks and some left over fat from when she was pregnant a load of years ago... So you haven't seen anything yet, wait till the g/f gets pregnant, she will likely end up fatter than she is now when she has the baby...

 

Lol thats messed up bro i wouldn't do that to her. And i have been with woman who had babies. Not gonna lie its bad but its not that bad. I can live with what having a baby does to a womans body.

[Rinas]

Just start distancing yourself from her, so to have time to look for a hotter body, but still have her and not be alone..

 

That is RIDICULOUS advice to give. OP do NOT do this. Talk to your GF about the issues, she may be willing to work on her weight. If you split up, then you can look for others.

 

Never use a person just to "not be alone".

 

 

I am actually in a similar dilemna myself at the moment. Met a hot woman, great personaility, pretty, small waist size..etc.. but when she undressed, YIKES!!!!!!!! stretch marks and some left over fat from when she was pregnant a load of years ago... So you haven't seen anything yet, wait till the g/f gets pregnant, she will likely end up fatter than she is now when she has the baby...

 

Sorry that this new hot woman couldn't meet perfection for you.

 

Many women take care of their bodies during pregnancy. I guess you'll be looking around till you're not alone? :rolleyes:

[thatone]

K but why umad though? Lol take a chill pill. I was trying to explain to you his way of thinking not be condescending. So idk why umad but umad though. I don't know what post you're talking about but the post you quoted was speaking nothing but truth.

 

Of course there are skinny people who don't work out and eat junk. They are called ectomorphs. Its genetic so there ectomorph kids probably won't get fat either.

 

And yea there are fat people who eat health food but they aren't in the majority. The majority of fat people are fat for a reason. That reason is called laziness. They are weak. Not trying to bag on fat people i could care less if someone is fat or not that is there personal choice. And just because someone is fat that doesn't make them a bad parent. But if there kids pick up on there habits yes it will make there kids fat. There is exceptions to every rule but the rules is there for a reason.

 

lol, there's probably fat people reading this thinking people who can't use their and there properly are the worst possible candidates to be parents.

 

there are assuredly people who think that if the best you can come up with for your strawman is the 'umad' defese that you DEFINITELY don't need to be a parent.

 

you're not weak though, you got those roids to make you strong, right?

 

maybe the one you got is the best you can do.

[TheCoolest]

lol, there's probably fat people reading this thinking people who can't use their and there properly are the worst possible candidates to be parents.

 

there are assuredly people who think that if the best you can come up with for your strawman is the 'umad' defese that you DEFINITELY don't need to be a parent.

 

you're not weak though, you got those roids to make you strong, right?

 

maybe the one you got is the best you can do.

Are you one of those fat people? I write for a living. Just not too worried about grammar while posting on a forum. And what does grammar have to do with being a good parent? Nothing? I know.

 

And the best i can come up with? I kinda proved everything she said wrong though. I put umad cuz shemad kinda like how umad. Get it?

 

And don't even try to comment on anyones grammar until you learn to spell. Is shift button on your keyboard broken? Fail post is fail.

 

And yes as far as personality goes she is the best i can do. Thanks for pointing that out.

Edited July 6, 2011 by TheCoolest

[OliveOyl]

Well, if she is healthy but if it doesn't turn him on then he has every right to dump her.

 

Ok, and about reality. I've seen plenty of REAL LIFE people who look like models on magazine covers or even better. A lot of people like to say "Oh no one looks that good in real life" to compensate for their own average self but I live in Orange County and around O.C AND Los Angeles I see people ALL THE TIME who look that good in the flesh.

Ahh... that explains it