jealous of of new girlfriends same sex experiencesbasically me and an old friend were

[k100danny]

basically me and an old friend were reunited around 6 months ago and formed a great friendship. i like everything about this girl, we told each other most things and obviously trusted each other greatly.

 

she admitted she had feelings for me and i also said i did too, we started to flirt ect and go on a few dates. we have been in a casual relationship for only a few weeks when we were on a night out and she flirted blatantly with a female friend of hers who is gay. now she had told me previously that when she was younger she had fooled around with a friend kind of experimenting and this left her confised and she experimented a little. now she says she can find women sexually attractive but doesnt see herself ending up with a woman as she pictures herself with a family ect, she said it was rare she found a woman attractive but from time to time yes she did. now she says lots of women experience this at some time in there life which may be true or not. the thing is i am now having lots of doubts. I do get slightly jealous anyway but nothing that usually causes me much trouble at all. this has played on my mind a lot though, i guess i kind of new going in that she had had these experiences before but to actually see her flirt made me feel sick.

 

we argued and she cried and said she had been in love with me for a long time and she has a flirty nature but she said obviously now we were in some kind of relationship this wouldnt happen again, she was also very drunk at the time (not an excuse i know)

 

I am so worried that this will end and not only the relationship will go but probably the best friendship i have formed in the last 10 years also. any advice would be great. thanks in advance. she has assured me she would never cheat on me and as far as i know has been totally honest with me about everything (more than was best if im honest)

[PegNosePete]

Which are you worried about more? That she finds other women attractive or that she flirted blatantly with someone else in front of you?

 

If the former then look at it this way. Do you find other women attractive? If you sad no then you are lying. You find many women attractive and she finds many men attractive. So what does it matter if she finds women attractive too? All it means is that she finds a lot of people attractive. It doesn't mean she is any more or less likely to cheat than if she found only a few people attractive.

 

The blatant flirting with someone else is in my opinion much worse. What would you have done if it had been with a guy? It's pretty disrespectful but if she seems truly sorry and determined that it will never happen again, and hasn't given you reason to disbelieve her since, then I would be inclined to give her the benefit of the doubt.

[k100danny]

its more the fact that i saw her flirt, she says it was playfull and it was with a long time friend. i dotn think she thought it would bother me being a woman and all and when i walked out she looked distraught, she was shaking and crying ect. not a nice thing to see but i think it means she cares about me a lot.

 

i hope i can come to terms with it in my mind because i would hate for it not to work and if it went really bad we may end up not being friends either.