tryingtorecover Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 Hello everyone...new here but have been browsing the forum. Just need a venting ground to help me move on so do bear with me! Will welcome any input as well. Basically, me and my ex have broken up after 4 years plus. It was, in a word, beautiful. We even went overseas back in December and had so much fun there. But now... He started mentioning in May that he could not see our future together. Initially he painted the problem out to be our age difference (17 years. Yes I know it's huge but it was amazing being with him), but later he talked more about his change in feelings. It really devastated me. I made all the mistakes that dumpees invariably made: cried, begged for another chance etc. Of course, they didn't work, but instead drove him further away from me, or at least that's what I felt. He went from "Maybe we should give each other space till the end of the year" to "Let's keep away until the emotional attachment is not there anymore." Recently he went to London, and I'm guessing he just got back today. What's worse is that he was my first love. And I realised after this separation, I love him more than I ever thought I did before. I know about all the NC rules etc. I do try hard not to contact him now, but I had been stupid previously and went to email him, basically laying all my cards on the table. Yup the ball's in his court now, but I doubt he will return it back to me anytime soon. Ok I'm rambling on now... Sorry for being so long-winded just need to get all these off my chest! Part of me has accepted it, and I've deleted his number and email (but I still remember them...sucks.), but part of me still holds on to the hope that he will give us another chance. It's been 4 days since the last time we had contact. Give me strength, to move on from this... Link to post Share on other sites
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