Fiancée of friend asked me to for approval of sexy outfit

[confused_man]

OK I am more confused right now – I yesterday Amy, the fiancée of a friend, basically asked me to for approval for wearing a sexy outfit.

 

I picked up Amy and her friend Ann at Amy’s place last night. Amy wore jeans and a grey tank top – under it a black bra – clearly visible in the back and sides. I came in and sat down Ann was in the bathroom. Amy moved around talking to me and Ann.

At some point Amy asked whether it was better to go with or without the bra. Ann said something that I did not understand. I said I don’t know. She went to her room and came back without the bra and asked how it looks. I said that it looked good – did not know what else to say.

On the way to the car Ann asked Amy about her outfit and Amy told her that I thought it was good.

 

She did not flirt with me. At our event Amy talked to other people and she got a ride home from another girl.

[Lucky_One]

She doesn't sound like she is coming on to you at all.

 

You, on the other hand, seem a bit obsessed with her and her actions. Are you crushing on her?

[carhill]

Don't worry about it OP. You're a 'safe' friend of her fiance. She was asking for a man's opinion and you gave her one.

 

So, did you meet any single ladies at the event?

[Memphis Raines]

and just why are you picking up your friend's fiance for a night on the town?

 

I think you need to worry a little less about what she is asking you, or doing in front of you and a little more time being a true friend to her fiance.

 

Because you are putting yourself in a position to have these interactions with her.

 

your "friend" is being disrespected by his fiance.........and you. if you were a friend, I'd let him know what is going on. that is of course you like these interactions with her which is why you place yourself in situations where he isn't around.

[TigerCub]

I think you need to stop spending so much time with Amy.

 

She's not hitting on you, BUT she is being a tease, and that's not appropriate when she's engaged to someone else, and you're actually his friend to boot.

 

Stop putting yourself in situations with this Amy and then obsessing about her bra-less adventures

[elleorbianca]

Nothing going on here. Stop crushing on your friend's fiance

[Chi townD]

Yeah, I don't think she's flirting or trying to come on to you. I think she a girl that's very secure with her body and wanted a man's (and her girlfriends) opinion.

 

And don't take this the wrong way, but she might think your gay. Something like this happened to me before. My buddy was dating this girl and in a previous relationship she had, her Ex's friends were always hitting on her. So, she asked my buddy about me. Apparently, he said, "don't worry, he's harmless." She took that statement to mean that I was gay. One day we we're going out with a group of people and we ended up that their place and we we're changing to go out that evening. My friends girlfriend yell down from upstairs to bring her jeans up that were folded up on top of the dryer in their utility room as my buddy was out in the Garage loading up the car.

 

I went uo there knocked on the door, and she told me to come in. She was standing there in her bra and panties with and open blouse that she was in the process of buttoning up. My jaw hit the floor and I tossed the jeans on the bed and got the hell out of there.

 

I went to the kitchen my friend came in and saw that something was up. I told him that I walked in on his girl changing and that I was sorry. He didn't think it was a big deal and for me not to worry about it.

 

Later, he called me and had to tell me what she said after he asked about the incident. She said she didn't know why it would have upset me so much to see her in a state of undress.

He said, "Because he's my friend and you're my girlfriend."

She said, " Yeah, but he's gay."

He responded, " What?!?! No he's not."

She said, "Ummm...yeah, you told me he was."

"No, I told you he was harmless, he's not gay."

He told me she went white as a sheet and kept on saying, "OH MY GOD!"

 

True story, they been married for eight years now and I stood up at their wedding.

[nyc_guy2003]

So how did they look without a bra?

[Coil]

PIX or it did not happen!!!

 

no but seriously what TigerCub said. I have been following your other thread and this does not sound like a healthy situation.

 

How would the fiance that is away feel about all of these happenings?

 

Move on and find a single woman.

[confused_man]

Thank you for your feedback.

 

First a few clarifications.

I am not in love with Amy. I do not want to sleep with her.

I am not very good with relationships and women in general – that’s why I ask for help.

It is hard for me to judge what is normal and what is not.

Amy does not flirt with me or acts strange in any other way – just the change in dress.

 

I am still confused.

Some of you think she is behaving normal, some think she is not.

 

Some of you think I should avoid contact – that would be difficult – is there an alternative?

Not seeing Amy would mean that I give up 90% of my social life – we have the same friends.

Plus, I have agreed to a number of upcoming events where she will be present.

What would I tell her? I do not want to hang out with you anymore? Why?

 

Should I talk to her or Alan?

 

Or should I just do nothing? When do I have to do something?

[Chi townD]

If you are uncomfortable being around her, then don't be around her. I personally wouldn't think much of it, but I would keep an eye out. Maybe she's dressing sexy for someone other than Alan. If that's the case, then I would inform him. But, if she just the same old Ann but just dresses different than what you're used to, then I wouldn't say anything. When would you say something? When she asks your opinion on a black see-thru teddy.

[Memphis Raines]

Thank you for your feedback.

 

First a few clarifications.

I am not in love with Amy. I do not want to sleep with her.

 

ok, so why are you placing yourself in situations where you are with Amy, but her fiance, your friend, is nowhere in sight?

 

 

Amy does not flirt with me or acts strange in any other way – just the change in dress.

 

if this were true, I don't think it would prompt you to create an account on loveshack to gain insight on why she asked you about it this one time if she doesn't flirt with you or act strange.

 

creating an account here to talk about her asking you about a dress one time? really?

 

 

Some of you think I should avoid contact – that would be difficult – is there an alternative?

 

not avoid contact, but contact where you are alone with her, or at the very least hanging out with her without her fiance.

 

 

Not seeing Amy would mean that I give up 90% of my social life – we have the same friends.

Plus, I have agreed to a number of upcoming events where she will be present.

What would I tell her? I do not want to hang out with you anymore? Why?

 

no, because according to what you just said, its not a problem. You now say she doesn't flirt with you or act strange in any way, other than asking you one time about how she looks in a dress. I don't get it.

[make me believe]

Wow. You are giving way too much thought to a couple of freaking OUTFITS! lol. First of all: I do think it was inappropriate of her to ask you if she should wear it with or without a bra. Her fiance would probably not appreciate that. But also, you're just reading waaaayyy too much into all of this!! Especially the "sexy" outfits -- in your other thread you said she wore a short dress and high heels to an event a group of friends went to. I wear stuff like that frequently when I go out. I certainly hope my husband's friends don't think that I am wearing it for them specifically. Girls like to look good, ok? Maybe she is just experimenting with dressing up more. And as for her not wearing a bra recently, well that's tacky but some women don't feel the need to wear bras all the time. I seriously doubt it has anything to you.

 

Anyway you need to stop overthinking this, and maybe not spend so much time with her when her fiance is not present. You're way too fixated on what a couple of random outfits may or may not mean. If your friend knew you were on here creating threads about how his fiance dresses (and trying to convince us that you're not obsessing about it when clearly you are), he'd probably be super weirded out.

[confused_man]

Thank you for all the replies – even the not so serious ones.

 

This really helped me to reflect.

I am not good at reading others and cannot anticipate their reactions.

 

I realized what I am most worried about is losing my friends – it takes me a long time to get close to people. I think I thought that Amy’s – perceived – change in attitude could threaten my friendship to her, Alan and our common friends.

 

I will see both of them tonight – I will pick up Amy and we go to a party – Alan will join us there (he is coming in late from out of town)

[jnj express]

Sounds like amy's fiance is using you, to make sure his GF, is safe, and you are just falling right in----

 

Time for you to stop escorting Amy around town, and go find a real live girl of your own

 

You should not be Alan's lackey, and amy's cheauffer, and escort.

 

No matter how hard it is, go out there on your own, and find your own girl, and start to live your own life

 

Right now you are making every excuse in the book, to avoid facing life!!!!!