Has anyone ever remained friends with an ex and got them back?

[d'janiero]

Definitely listen to this. Also, stop seeing her now since she wants space. That will give her time to decide if she really does want you back and act on it if she does. If you keep "hanging around" with her without a commitment, sooner or later she will meet another guy she wants to date and there will be nothing you can say about it. The pain will be terrible if you wait for that to happen. You are a good man and deserve to have a woman want you the way you want her. Good luck.

 

I hear what your saying, but she is the one who always innitiates hanging out, or going out together. I try and give her space, but she always contacts me.

Her moving on and dating a new guy is one of my biggest fears of all. And this is way I believe at times that NC is a must.

Thanks for your kind words:)

 

You have to do what is healthy for you! If having this limbo - confusing contact is making you miserable then maybe it is not a good idea.

 

I can't say that you will or will not get back together by remaining friends.

 

The thing that worries me the most is that you are allowing yourself to stay in this state of turmoil and it sounds like she is getting her cake and eating it too!

 

She is probably also confused as to what she wants. Going through an illness as she did is not easy and can often times result in confusion and questions about your life. Not that this should be an excuse - but it very well be playing a part in her confusion.

 

Maybe you should seek some hep individually and then ask her to join you. Be completely honest with her -- a decision has to be made -- you can't go on with the confusion and pain. She will have to decide if she is really ready to lose you or commit to you.

 

You both may need help figuring this out so you can move forward with your lives together or apart in a healthy way and find the relationship you deserve!

 

I wish you the best of luck.

 

Its awful being in this limbo mode:(. I simply don't know what is happening between us from one day to the next:(

 

I have considered getting help and asking her to come along, but she simply isnt one to sit and discuss her problems, let alone with a stranger. Its just the way she is really.

I love this girl with all my heart, especially after going through such a tough time with the cancer.

But each day that goes by,my emotions are simply all over the show. I want to be honest with her and tell her how I feel, but then stop myself, and think well, she knows this already.

 

Part of me does feel guilty about walking away and going NC. One of my best friends GFs passed away from cancer a couple of weeks ago. This has had a huge impact on me i.e. throughout the funeral, I was thinking to my self wow...that could have easily been me having to bury my gf when we were together.

 

I guess the point that I'm making is that part of me still feels obligated and wants to look after her even now. So I feel guilty for having to cut her out of my life and go NC. But I havent got any other option really I guess.

 

Thanks:)