How to deal with hearbreak... a list of small things to do

[reimeivn]

Here I have a list of things that helped me a lot, some of those seem very silly but make sense:

 

1. Eating a bowl of fresh fruit everyday

2. Cooking new meal/ try new recipe almost everyday

3. A new mirror

4. A new pocket planner

5. A new set of bedding

6. New shoes!

7. Planting flowers

8. Deleting people from my facebook

9. Being on a facebook diet

10. Cleaning the house. All the times.

 

I just got a panic attack writing this thinking about my ex in bed with somebody else. But hmm, it doesn't matter. SO whatever.

 

What do you do that helps?

[amethyste]

1. I eat fruits daily too! (I didn't use to eat fruits before my break-up)

2. Shopping - I rarely buy new things because I have everything I need, but I like looking at stuff, walking & being outside. I'm now focused on shoes, plaid shirts, and items that have a classy, non-obnoxious animal print on them

3. Cross stitching - it's relaxing and gives me the opportunity to think about something else

4. Re-arranging stuff - I took everything out of all of my closets (clothes, accessories, sheets, towels, fabrics, threads, buttons, dishes blah blah) and I'm now re-arranging them

5. Cooking - I haven't been in the mood for cooking lately, but I have a long list of recipes I wanna try.

6. Crossword puzzles

7. Playing all kind of (PC) games

8. Working

9. Reading

 

I don't have a Fb account anymore, yaaaay!

[radiodarcy]

i love the facebook diet! i've done that too and it really has helped me heal. other things i have done:

 

1.) went vegetarian - - which has also done wonders for my mood and energy

2.) tried out new classes at the gym - - i've lost the two inches i'd been wanting to lose and toned up more

3.) developed a deeper appreciation for my own interests -- like reading and writing. i've already finished three books and am on my fourth.reading really does help keep the mind off the ex!

4.) gotten out more with friends and family

5.) splurging on a haircut or new item of clothing - - when i can afford it! lol

[thelovingkind]

Reading a novel at least an hour every day.

Doing a full body work out every two days.

Come on love shack and try to help people out.

Learn to cook new meals (most recent success, Pasta Carbonara).

 

I try to keep it simple, just enriching myself as a person and also gaining practical skills that'll help when I start dating / relationships in the future. My new motto is to try and be the sort of person I want to meet - not someone who's perfect, but just someone who's doing their best to make the most of this lonely world.

[reimeivn]

I feel like one of the things I stopped doing recently that makes me happy is just to sit back, relax, and be easy with myself.

 

I dont care what people think of me anymore, which will be really good in the long term because I can focus more on building my own values and set boundaries in relationships.

 

I also do not care about people more than I should anymore. I mean I started doing volunteering and such, but I do not care if my male roommate do not have a ride to the groceries store. He never asked me to help him get a ride there, and he lives at my place, piss me off, and I am NOT HIS MOM. So hell with it. If he says thank it would have been much easier and less awkward but he never did so I dont care. I need to stop mommying the guys in my life, it's an Asian thing and it is getting on my nerves as I care too much my brain hurts.

 

It's so true when you are not in a relationship you need to care about yourself. Try to get to know yourself and treat yourself better.

[Steven T]

Here is what I have done, and I feel AMAZING.

 

1. Moved house.

2. Got a new phone, new number.

3. Working out everyday.

4. Talking and hanging out with new girl-friends.

5. Playing video games

6. Got a full time job.

7. Enjoying my life

 

 

[PelicanPete]

Things I did to help get over my ex.

 

While I was depressed/heartbroken:

 

-Reflected on my what I didn't like about myself

-Conquered my phobia of a certain insect

-Identified and fixed my emotional prejudices

-Reconnected with people from my past and fixed my wrongs

-Contacted a girl I use to like and told her what I was once too afraid to

-Started a journal and wrote down every thought and feeling

-Began working towards things I felt I could never do

 

When I was moving on:

-Looked for a job

-Started working out 6 days a week

-Helped people on LS

-Ate healthier

-Started taking care of some plants

-Fixed things around the house

-Became closer with family

 

8 months after breakup:

 

-Found a new job that I love

-Made new friends

-Learned how to handstand and human flag

-Ripped

-Happy with who I am

-No regrets

-Excited for the future

[thelovingkind]

Good stuff Pelican Pete, I've been getting really into bodyweight stuff too. Nothing beats the satisfaction from mastering a new bodyweight move. I hope to be at about human flag level in 8 months Check out the book "Convict Conditioning" if you haven't, I think it's the best one for bodyweight progressions...leads you to stuff like one arm chin up, one arm press up and even one arm handstand press up eventually.

 

Anyway, just posting to say two that I forgot:

 

Flossing my teeth every day!

Learnt to enjoy coffee without sugar (= 2 or 3 fewer tsps of sugar a day I'll consume for the rest of my life)

 

Adding these tiny steps of self-care and pride in your body and respect for your well-being to a daily routine post-break up has made such a difference for me. This is a great thread with lots of inspiring stuff. I hope that any freshly broken up people here who are about to sit down in front of the television for seven hours with a bottle of whiskey and a carton of icecream read over this and take a different approach!

Edited July 9, 2011 by thelovingkind

[IfiKnewThen]

conquered some fears.

 

stayed in touch with God.

 

swim.

 

game

 

try to help on LS

 

in touch with old friends and visit with a sick friend

 

try to cheer others up

 

reflective (this can be healthy or not lol)

 

ride bike again

 

cut my hair different

 

i like the stages of healing that pelicanpete highlights. its true one uses different coping methods and different times or stages of healing. also became closer with family. still a work in progress : )

[Treble Clef]

1. Getting back on a normal sleep schedule. Sleeping at 12 and getting up at 8 feels so much better than 4am and sleeping in till noon ^_^

 

2. Cooking! I'm experimenting with Japanese dishes now

 

3. Video game/movie marathons with friends

 

4. Read the Bible and pray

 

5. Make a photo scrapbook. So much easier now that I upgraded to an iphone lol

 

6. Help on LS

 

 

I was feeling crappy yesterday but I hope today will be good =)

[sleepykitten]

Great thread....

Here's what I've done-after the second week of break up hell was over

 

Facebook culling/blocking

 

Listening to Louise hays power thoughs every night as i go to sleep

 

Listening to a talk only radio station in the mornings while i get ready (no chance of any songs triggering memories/feelings).

 

Reading novels

 

Read the secret by rhonda byrne and put it into practise daily

 

Write a gratidue list at the end of each day

 

Wrote a list of all the things i want to achieve.eg..buy a flat next year, what will be in it, roll top bath, types of decor etc (i live in rented and have for 3 yrs so I am desperate to have my own tastes, furniture, a garden).

 

Eating healthily

 

Cut down on the smoking

 

Posting reading threads on here

 

List of goals for next few week...exercise, sort out cupboards, start writing, cook more, go out more but not out drinking, walks etc, exploring london.