RiderCC Posted July 13, 2011 Share Posted July 13, 2011 So, I met an amazing girl and we started spending a lot of time together. She is in a relationship of 3 years with a man. One day we spent together she told me she owed me for helping her. I said than you give me one chance if you ever break up, and she said yes, for sure. Then she took me out to the bar and we got real drunk and started making out heavily in the bar and then made love all night. About 2 hours later she had to get up for work and was very upset with herself for what she had done, not upset with me at all. She knows that I am in love with her yet says that we would never make a good couple. We have a lot in common but not everything, the way it should be I think. She is very much in love with her man, but I feel she wanted to get drunk and let her inhibitions go. She really means the world to me and yes, I compare every woman to her. Her smile, her lips, her eyes just envelope me and I turn to mush. I will never be happy until I have her. Her boyfriend does not know about this and she and I still talk and discuss things in our relationships. What do I do? Does she love me too? Is she just telling me this for her own support? I want her in every way, and I am willing to wait. She also wont set me up with any of her friends yet she was supposedly happy when I got a girlfriend. I think she is saving me for her secretly, but just doesnt want to admit it? I have other girl/friends that think what she did that night was on purpose. What should I do ? Girls Opinions wanted also PLEASE !! Link to post Share on other sites
Author RiderCC Posted July 13, 2011 Author Share Posted July 13, 2011 btw. I am 38 y/o and she is 26. I am divorced, she has never been married and doesnt want to get married. Ladies, Please respond, What do you think? Link to post Share on other sites
Nela Posted July 17, 2011 Share Posted July 17, 2011 Maybe she wants you both... Maybe she really loves her boyfriend and wouldnt be able to stand hurting him, but at the same really likes you too. Bets are she is absolutely and totally confused right now, and bare in mind, she just cheated on her boyfriend with you - and judging by her reaction, she feels absolutely horrible about that too. So, ask her what she is willing to do. If she is willing to leave her boyfriend, and be with you, then yay for you. However, if she cant make a decision, you will have to make it for her, because if you dont, she will not only be hurting you, but her boyfriend as well. He exists too, and he will probably be devastated to know that she cheated on him. So, if she's not willing to be with you, you have to let go! You have honestly got to let go... Go NC for a while, explain to her that you need some time, and just try the hardest to move on. Because what if in 5 years time, she will still be with her boyfriend? Then what about you? You need to live your life!!! Try to move on, and if she ever wants to try things with you, then fair enough, go ahead, give it a try, but you cant wait for that to happen. As hard as it is (we all know it's impossibly hard to let go :S) Good luck - talk to her, see what she wants, if she doesnt know, you can always give her a deadline - after that deadline, if she still doesnt know, you move on. Link to post Share on other sites
Cracker Jack Posted July 17, 2011 Share Posted July 17, 2011 As someone who's been in a situation similar to this, all I can say is there's a great chance she'll just tell you she doesn't want to have anything more than friendship. What she said about you two not making a good couple is already a good hint at that. She knew what she was getting into that night, but realized it wasn't worth her relationship when it was all done. You can continue to wait if you want, but the chances of her actually leaving her boyfriend isn't really in your favor. You'd probably be better off not pursuing this woman. Link to post Share on other sites
susanfollows Posted July 19, 2011 Share Posted July 19, 2011 It's very easy to explain this womans behavior, you men just don't get it! She actually doesn't want you or her current boyfriend, she wants to be free and sleep around. But her relationship with the boyfriend has gone on so long she's afraid to leave it and so used you as an excuse to test the waters. Now she's blaming herself but deep inside she thinks this is all to much and it might be better to cut all contact with both of you and start a fresh new life. That's what I've seen 3 of my friends do and each time they dumped both men they were with and went out to party and stuff. You scored so that's a big plus for you, at least you had some fun with her before anything else happens but as far as future relationship? I seriously doubt she'd do it as she'll now feel you caused her to breakup with the bf whenever it does happen and despite what she says to you I know she'll do it! Link to post Share on other sites
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