How do you know if you are on the verge of becoming a stalker?

[anon]

I can't seem to get over the break-up with my ex-boyfriend.

 

He left me with no warning. just got up and disappeared without leaving an address or nothin. I tried to find him, finally traced his whereabouts my reverse phone numbers on the internet. went to his place and demanded to speak to him, but he wouldn't let me in. Said he'd call the police if i botherd him again. all i wanted to do was talk. he won't give me any time. what do I do? Am I a stalker?

[Tony T]

You're not a stalker yet but you certainly are a glutton for punishment. You were hurt enough by the way he left. He clearly showed you he was rotten to the core and didn't care enough about you to say good-bye. Now why would you want to put yourself through more pain, suffering and rejection by hunting down this guy so he can further crush you???

 

If you are obsessed out of control, see a professional counsellor immediately. You need to heal from this without the normal closure that any decent guy would give you. But to put yourself at the hands of such an uncaring, inhuman scumbag is highly irrational on your part.

 

STAY AWAY FROM HIM AT ALL COST. You are doing nothing more than making a great fool of yourself by contacting him in any way.

 

He has warned you that he will call the police if you come around again and I'm sure he would. This sorry excuse for a living organism IS NOT WORTH GOING TO JAIL FOR!!!

[Deejette]

Even if he explained to you why he left, the way he left you was cruel and inhumane. He could give you a hundred reasons for why he left, but changing yourself to suit him would not be the answer, because he sounds like an uncaring person. Believe it or not, you are lucky to be rid of him, though it hurts now. But you would be stalking him if you came after him after his warning.

You're not a stalker yet but you certainly are a glutton for punishment. You were hurt enough by the way he left. He clearly showed you he was rotten to the core and didn't care enough about you to say good-bye. Now why would you want to put yourself through more pain, suffering and rejection by hunting down this guy so he can further crush you??? If you are obsessed out of control, see a professional counsellor immediately. You need to heal from this without the normal closure that any decent guy would give you. But to put yourself at the hands of such an uncaring, inhuman scumbag is highly irrational on your part. STAY AWAY FROM HIM AT ALL COST. You are doing nothing more than making a great fool of yourself by contacting him in any way. He has warned you that he will call the police if you come around again and I'm sure he would. This sorry excuse for a living organism IS NOT WORTH GOING TO JAIL FOR!!!