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It will be a year on 4th August .....


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We've talked a little via e-mail in the past year. He gave me false hopes. Valentines Day he put a card through the door and left a teddy bear on the doorstep. The card read on the front "I loved you yesterday, I love you today and I will love you all the tomorrows". He wrote inside "For all the days I've missed and all the nights I will miss".

 

Then in April a birthday card "You will always have a place in my heart".

 

Then email contact - he said about 2 months ago that we could try again, slowly as just friends. And now nothing. Haven't heard from him in 4 weeks and not expecting to.

 

Why did he give me false hopes? I still hurt like hell and it isn't getting any easier. I keep hoping to get a call or an email from him, but I know it won't happen. I want him out of my head, but he's in there constantly. Every minute of every day.

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Hey Lamp, I've got the anniversary of my breakup coming up August 14th, and her B-Day is the 2nd. I know I'll have it on my mind too. Fortunately though my ex hasn't tried to contact me in all this time.

 

I read a book called "He's Scared, She's Scared" by Steven Carter abut commitment-phobic people, and the way your ex has behaved sounds pretty commitment-phobic to me. He can't commit to being with you but he also wants to keep you hanging on just in case he decides he wants to give it a go again someday. The book made a lot of sense when it said that a relationship like this never really ends until the dumpee decides to let it go.

 

Clearly what he;s doing is hurting you, and you won't be able to heal until he's out of your life. When he contacts you again (and he probably will) I think you need to pull the plug. You need to take a stand and tell him that you're no longer an option and that he needs to move on.

 

So you'll always have a place in his heart? He made his choice and he needs to deal with it.

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Thanks for the reply. I just need to get over him and it's easier said than done.

Hope you deal with your "anniversary" OK.

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