Consolidated Discussion - Older/younger woman/man and age gap dating

[joystickd]

I like his article: 'Age-Shaming' Men Who Only Want Younger Women Is Justified | The Stir

LOL! You had to find an article to fit your needs. Funny thing is no man here will attack this article the way women attack a man's article that has male centric view. First thing you all will say its misogynist.

[oz-missy]

Well, let me know how that works out for you when you're 30 and wanting children, and he's 50 and has finished with child rearing. Or when you're 40 and in the middle of raising children, and he's 60 and ready for retirement. Or when you're 50 and wanting to enjoy your empty nest and do some traveling, and he's 70 with health problems. Let me know how that works out for you. *winks*

 

Well for your information, he has 2 teenage children. He is 50, I'm 30. We are planning to have a baby in the next year or so. We have family support so it won't just be the two of us raising the baby but the family coming together as a community to raise the child.

 

Any other questions? Oh that's right. It's my life. We love each other and couldn't give a $h!+ what others think.

[KathyM]

Well for your information, he has 2 teenage children. He is 50, I'm 30. We are planning to have a baby in the next year or so. We have family support so it won't just be the two of us raising the baby but the family coming together as a community to raise the child.

 

Any other questions? Oh that's right. It's my life. We love each other and couldn't give a $h!+ what others think.

Well, good luck with that. I hope it works out for you.

[pickflicker]

Well, let me know how that works out for you when you're 30 and wanting children, and he's 50 and has finished with child rearing. Or when you're 40 and in the middle of raising children, and he's 60 and ready for retirement. Or when you're 50 and wanting to enjoy your empty nest and do some traveling, and he's 70 with health problems. Let me know how that works out for you. *winks*

 

How patronising, for someone who makes their living out of counselling people.

[Woggle]

If two consenting adults want to date each other it is their business. I don't see why others feel the need to poke into their lives.

[KathyM]

And these men looking for a younger woman are not insecure? I don't think too many of these meetings happen by chance, if they meet via the internet for example the older man and the younger woman are well aware of the age difference.

Exactly. Men are insecure about their aging, so they go after much younger women. Women are insecure about their aging because men their age reject them for much younger women.

[Robert Z]

Meh. I've got my solid relationship, and I'm not in competition with younger women for my husband. My husband is 6 years older than me and gets complimented frequently about his young looking wife, so I have no worries in that department. I'm merely stating a principle: that older men who pursue much younger women either can't relate to women their own age because of their own immaturity, or they feel the need to feed their ego by going after much younger women, or they feel they can control a much younger woman.

 

 

I love how you post unsupported and indefensible personal opinions as fact.

 

It is mostly simple biology. With youth comes the beauty of youth. Statements like yours are so naïve as to laughable. But in a sense there is truth in what you say. It is arguments like yours that to a large degree make me prefer younger women. I can hardly think of a better example. You either vilify men or your are condescending in your attitude. No matter the issue, your arguments always put men at fault. That in a nutshell is what turns me off more than anything else when it comes to women my age. The 70s and women's lib taught women that they are superior to men.

 

You have falsely accused me of being a pimp or similar for two years now. So how do you justify that besides blind hate of men who don't see the world as you do? The fact is that I am an engineer with my own company and have been for almost two decades.

[Woggle]

Exactly. Men are insecure about their aging, so they go after much younger women. Women are insecure about their aging because men their age reject them for much younger women.

 

There are women who are into younger men as well. I don't go around complaining about Madonna, J Lo and Susan Sarandon. If them and the guys they are dating are happy more power to them.

[Robert Z]

There are women who are into younger men as well. I don't go around complaining about Madonna, J Lo and Susan Sarandon. If them and the guys they are dating are happy more power to them.

 

 

 

Don't you mean whining and passing judgment?

[KathyM]

If two consenting adults want to date each other it is their business. I don't see why others feel the need to poke into their lives.

Because a lot of older men ARE predators. I know some who ARE predators, and take advantage of the naivety and inexperience of younger women.

 

 

And also, it's discrimination. I don't think men would be all that happy if women would only be interested in men much younger than them. I wonder how many men on this thread would be content if the only women that were interested in them were 15+ years older than them. I doubt men would be saying it doesn't matter to them.

[hotpotato]

Yeah..ok sure....

 

Thats why last year when we went on vacation at the beach with two other couples,(both guys in their 30's), this "old man"(me) was the only one in the water playing with the kids...Neither of the other two lett the towels...One has bad knees and the other one is so fat, he's too embarrassed to take his t-shirt off because his man boobs are friggin hideous..

 

I get where you are coming from...but people arent created equal..I womder how many folks would call Lee L..an "old guy"...(I think he is around 54)...

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qjtgy8x9sNM

 

TFY

He's still old, he's just well preserved.

That's like saying 50 year old women look like Rena Lesnar. The man is a very big outlier.

 

I'm liberal about age gaps, but a lot of men are simply delusional. They feel that no matter how old they are, as long as they can get it up they are desirable.

 

Ive had some old guys really come at me. It was really sad.

[joystickd]

Because a lot of older men ARE predators. I know some who ARE predators, and take advantage of the naivety and inexperience of younger women.

 

 

And also, it's discrimination. I don't think men would be all that happy if women would only be interested in men much younger than them. I wonder how many men on this thread would be content if the only women that were interested in them were 15+ years older than them. I doubt men would be saying it doesn't matter to them.

It really wouldn't matter men don't see women the way women see men

[Woggle]

Because a lot of older men ARE predators. I know some who ARE predators, and take advantage of the naivety and inexperience of younger women.

 

 

And also, it's discrimination. I don't think men would be all that happy if women would only be interested in men much younger than them. I wonder how many men on this thread would be content if the only women that were interested in them were 15+ years older than them. I doubt men would be saying it doesn't matter to them.

 

There are still a number of men interested in women their own age. I see plenty of couples that seem very happy and of men and women in their 40s and 50s.

[KathyM]

You either vilify men or your are condescending in your attitude.

Only to certain men. *winks* Men who prey on much younger women. Men who think they are too good for women their own age. I guess that would include you, since you so often like to brag about your sugar baby that's half your age on here.

No matter the issue, your arguments always put men at fault. That in a nutshell is what turns me off more than anything else when it comes to women my age. The 70s and women's lib taught women that they are superior to men.

Actually, women's lib has a long way to go. Some men still think they are superior to women, and they have a sense of entitlement. This age thing is just one example of that.

You have falsely accused me of being a pimp or similar for two years now. So how do you justify that besides blind hate of men who don't see the world as you do? The fact is that I am an engineer with my own company and have been for almost two decades.

Well, I have to wonder why a man who is secure in his manhood would make thread after thread over multiple years that brags about his relationships with prostitutes and sugar babies in such extensive detail as you do. I don't think my suspicions are too far fetched, considering.

[joystickd]

There are still a number of men interested in women their own age. I see plenty of couples that seem very happy and of men and women in their 40s and 50s.

^

This! It's funny how women on LS over dramatize certain issues. Most men look for women their age. You all on here talk sh*t about the few men that make the choice to talk to younger women. Let's be honest here women are more insecure about age and looks than men ever would be.

[xxoo]

I have no problem with men who date younger, or women who do so. I simply wouldn't consider it a desirable thing for me. And I understand why a woman wouldn't be interested in a relationship with an older man. Tons of drawbacks from my point of view. Plus, I'm most attracted to men my age. At 40, a fit 40 year old is so much hotter to me than a fit 20 year old. At 20, I didn't even notice 40 year old guys.

[joystickd]

 

You have falsely accused me of being a pimp or similar for two years now.

For real! She accused you of being a pimp lol. From your posts you would be more of a trick

[thefooloftheyear]

Meh. I've got my solid relationship, and I'm not in competition with younger women for my husband. My husband is 6 years older than me and gets complimented frequently about his young looking wife, so I have no worries in that department. I'm merely stating a principle: that older men who pursue much younger women either can't relate to women their own age because of their own immaturity, or they feel the need to feed their ego by going after much younger women, or they feel they can control a much younger woman. Unfortunately, when men abandon their same age female peers, where does that leave women that are 30+? With much older dudes than them, which they are not compatible with. No wonder women are frustrated. Some men refuse to grow up, and don't value women their own age. Can you really blame women for feeling frustrated about this? The middle aged men who want to deny their aging go after much younger women, and that leaves the 30+ women with much older dudes that are not compatible with them. Women get the short end of the stick on this.

 

So, if I read the tea leaves here, basically it is about competition....using yourself as an example is irrelevant...You are technically "off the market"..

 

And again...You keep using "catch phrases"(see bolded) that implies that men are the predators, the purveyors, the pursuers, the controllers...etc...You fail to ever recognize that the woman may be the pursuer and the guy is just accepting what is being handed to him...Shame on him?? *shrug*

 

And here I thought that all women of these days are empowered...You have them all as naive fools that get bamboozled...

 

Thanks for making my point!!

 

TFY

Edited April 16, 2014 by thefooloftheyear

[oz-missy]

And also, it's discrimination. I don't think men would be all that happy if women would only be interested in men much younger than them. I wonder how many men on this thread would be content if the only women that were interested in them were 15+ years older than them. I doubt men would be saying it doesn't matter to them.

 

A friend that I work with has been married for more than a decade to a woman who is 19 years his senior.

[mario_C]

"Age is just a number!", said no young person ever.

 

Exactly. Men are insecure about their aging, so they go after much younger women. Women are insecure about their aging because men their age reject them for much younger women.

And why are mature men insecure about their age? (That's age, not "aging" BTW.) Because threads like this and people like most of the posters here slam us with sweeping brushes as fat old geezers, dirty old men and self-important dimwits. They demand we be ashamed of ourselves. They, in a word, hate us.

Yes, I understand it happens to other people, and it's always wrong. Turning the tables doesn't make it right, though.

[Imported]

A friend that I work with has been married for more than a decade to a woman who is 19 years his senior.

 

 

OMFG!!!!! She is such a predertor! Preying on that poor innocent child. Has she no shame?

 

Or is it different somehow here?

[KathyM]

How patronising, for someone who makes their living out of counselling people.

Yeah, well, I'm tired of my young and vulnerable female clients being preyed on by much older men who are taking advantage of their psychological dysfunction. Yeah, I don't have a lot of empathy for male predators preying on vulnerable young women.

[Imported]

Yeah, well, I'm tired of my young and vulnerable female clients being preyed on by much older men who are taking advantage of their psychological dysfunction. Yeah, I don't have a lot of empathy for male predators preying on vulnerable young women.

 

What does it take to be a male "predator" in your opinion? Nevermind, I really don't care what you think. I just think it is funny that you actually advise people professionally with how closed minded you seem to be. And when I say funny, I mean sad. I think you are doing these people a dis-service. It's a ****ed up world, yes. The warped minded leading the blind.

Edited April 16, 2014 by Imported
Changed first use of the word blind to warped minded

[pickflicker]

Because a lot of older men ARE predators. I know some who ARE predators, and take advantage of the naivety and inexperience of younger women.

 

 

And also, it's discrimination. I don't think men would be all that happy if women would only be interested in men much younger than them. I wonder how many men on this thread would be content if the only women that were interested in them were 15+ years older than them. I doubt men would be saying it doesn't matter to them.

 

It is NOT discrimination. When a person is passed over for promotion at work because of their gender, sexual orientation or ethnicity, that's discrimination. What you're attracted to, is not "discrimination", it's what you're attracted to.

 

I absolutely hate it when people scream discrimination on issues that aren't discrimination. It makes a mockery of the term, which should be reserved for serious things that need the attention. Stop it.

[pickflicker]

Yeah, well, I'm tired of my young and vulnerable female clients being preyed on by much older men who are taking advantage of their psychological dysfunction. Yeah, I don't have a lot of empathy for male predators preying on vulnerable young women.

 

I think you'll find that most reasonable people don't. But when you're busy constructing a giant strawman to ineffectively cover up for your own blatant, sexist prejudices, I think you'll find it hard for reasonable people to continue to agree with you.

 

You're anti-male in the worst possible way. You're a counsellor. You should be less judgmental.