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Consolidated Discussion - Older/younger woman/man and age gap dating

sleepykitten

By sleepykitten
in General Relationship Discussion

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RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

Posted
Posted
Shame shame resorting to insults

 

 

It's not an insult. She admitted herself she is inexperienced.

 

 

Others have mentioned their concerns based on her inexperience as well.

 

 

We all know where YOU stand on women applying filters to men's behavior. You think women shouldn't have any. Filters that is.

 

 

Anyway, take it to the other thread. Her personal situation is discussed there.

joystickd Established Member

joystickd

Posted
Posted
It's not an insult. She admitted herself she is inexperienced.

 

 

Others have mentioned their concerns based on her inexperience as well.

 

 

We all know where YOU stand on women applying filters to men's behavior. You think women shouldn't have any. Filters that is.

You assume I think that it's ok to have filter so but too many ruin the whole experience. Plus I'm not an attraction at the circus so I'm not going through hoops for some woman to satisfy her need to control the dynamic of a relationship. I'm also not looking to control either.

sillyanswer Established Member

sillyanswer

Posted
Posted
Excellent. They were both 45 at the time. His character was a 'playboy' and the plot line was that he met his 'match' in Russo's part as the detective.

 

 

It should be noted that the screenplay was written by a woman. ;)

 

Well spotted! Will you be on my pub quiz team?

 

Another example: Chocolat. Juliette Binoche and Johnny Depp. Both around 35/36 at the time, if I've done my sums right. The book is by a woman, but the screenplay wasn't (and I have no idea what the ages of the characters are in either the book or the screenplay, I'm just mentioning the ages of the actors).

  • Like 1
RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

Posted
Posted
You assume I think that it's ok to have filter so but too many ruin the whole experience. Plus I'm not an attraction at the circus so I'm not going through hoops for some woman to satisfy her need to control the dynamic of a relationship. I'm also not looking to control either.

 

 

Not trying to control the dynamic. That's your baggage. I want a real partnership with a peer, not a poseur.

 

 

Just don't want to have sex with losers or men claiming to be something they are not. I can get that any day.

Babolat Established Member

Babolat

Posted
Posted
Noone does here. I've never stated it.

How quickly she forgets PMs that she sends to other LSers, and switching user names at one point. Some of us DO know how old you are.

I'm horny too; I think it's time for another dinner to persue the 29 year old again in her weakend emotional state of mind where she has no ability to make a decision on her own. Wait, she did, she is the one after 4+ weeks who said she could not have sex with me. Wait, she is the one who came back to me about 6 weeks later to say she wants to have sex with me again. Wait, she is the one who said after that she can't have sex with me......

 

Poor girl.

 

And yes, I am parading her, she's a hot one and I am an old crusty worn out has been.

 

Back to the topic....

  • Like 4
joystickd Established Member

joystickd

Posted
Posted
Not trying to control the dynamic. That's your baggage. I want a real partnership with a peer, not a poseur.

 

 

Just don't want to have sex with losers or men claiming to be something they are not. I can get that any day.

 

No you want control. We see how you say drive a motorcycle when it's ride. Any woman that demands a lot wants control or to control some dynamic in a relationship hoping the man will be invested. You make someone wait because you assume he will be really into you. It's the reason a lot of women do it. It comes from reacting than being proactive. Hell you nit picked about FWB and a man commenting about pubic hair. That's issues. You mentioned the need for a credit check. I'm not lookin for a relationship and able to be honest about it. I also can be honest with myself about reasons why I'm still single unlike you.

  • Like 1
joystickd Established Member

joystickd

Posted
Posted
I was reading this yesterday and it made me think of KathyM

 

Hollywood?s hottest cougars are hunting this 27-year-old | New York Post

 

A lot of guys like him out there but since he hasn't gotten married he doesn't exist per her marriage statistics.

 

Funny thing is there are plenty of men that like older women. I think these women would be pleasantly surprised

  • Like 1
Babolat Established Member

Babolat

Posted
Posted
He looks like a little kid in a couple of those photos!

 

I'm officially squicked out.

Me too! He must "have something", right? ;)

Untouched Established Member

Untouched

Posted
Posted
Was also going to say. This guy doesn't seem to be acting any differently than the younger 3-date rule guys you seem to want to avoid.

 

I did not share anything about how he is "acting." I wonder what you are talking about.

 

Maybe it's a generational thing; you seem to think that sex is something that men want and try to take from women. Isn't that pretty old school? Believe it or not, even in my uptight religeon, we are not taught that. It is supposed to be mutual. In marriage, though, of course! :)

 

Anyway, this man I dated - he "acted" in a way that made me like to be with him. Unlike the college guys who made me want to get out of there. That is all I am concerned about at this point. If I am enjoying it and I feel good about MYSELF with what is going on. Believe me I do have my eyes open. Just not because I think that all men and especially ones older than me have an evil agenda.

  • Like 1
joystickd Established Member

joystickd

Posted
Posted
I did not share anything about how he is "acting." I wonder what you are talking about.

 

Maybe it's a generational thing; you seem to think that sex is something that men want and try to take from women. Isn't that pretty old school? Believe it or not, even in my uptight religeon, we are not taught that. It is supposed to be mutual. In marriage, though, of course! :)

 

Anyway, this man I dated - he "acted" in a way that made me like to be with him. Unlike the college guys who made me want to get out of there. That is all I am concerned about at this point. If I am enjoying it and I feel good about MYSELF with what is going on. Believe me I do have my eyes open. Just not because I think that all men and especially ones older than me have an evil agenda.

It's not really a generational thing. Just bad experiences that they react badly to. People like that find aspects of the male/female interaction they can control. Sex being one. A person like that thinks if they can control aspects like that then maybe a desired result will occur. People are unpredictable and a man that genuinely likes you will want you whether its sex on first date or sex after marriage. People tend to vibe off of each other and if a woman gives off a you have to go through hoops to have me vibe very few men will give a positive result. Some will push for sex just for the challenge or even just to get them to leave them alone.

  • Like 1
RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

Posted
Posted
How quickly she forgets PMs that she sends to other LSers, and switching user names at one point. Some of us DO know how old you are.

I'm horny too; I think it's time for another dinner to persue the 29 year old again in her weakend emotional state of mind where she has no ability to make a decision on her own. Wait, she did, she is the one after 4+ weeks who said she could not have sex with me. Wait, she is the one who came back to me about 6 weeks later to say she wants to have sex with me again. Wait, she is the one who said after that she can't have sex with me......

 

Poor girl.

 

And yes, I am parading her, she's a hot one and I am an old crusty worn out has been.

 

Back to the topic....

 

 

?? I have no idea what you are talking about. I've never told you or anyone my age here. Not in a PM or anything else.

 

 

I know you asked before, and I declined.

RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

Posted
Posted
I did not share anything about how he is "acting." I wonder what you are talking about.

 

Maybe it's a generational thing; you seem to think that sex is something that men want and try to take from women. Isn't that pretty old school? Believe it or not, even in my uptight religeon, we are not taught that. It is supposed to be mutual. In marriage, though, of course! :)

 

Anyway, this man I dated - he "acted" in a way that made me like to be with him. Unlike the college guys who made me want to get out of there. That is all I am concerned about at this point. If I am enjoying it and I feel good about MYSELF with what is going on. Believe me I do have my eyes open. Just not because I think that all men and especially ones older than me have an evil agenda.

 

 

Sorry, not me either. Has always been mutual for me too.

 

 

You'll just have to take it on face value that I don't like having sex with strangers, and I am looking for a relationship. So I consider it a waste of my time and theirs to have sex with someone I'm not interested in pursuing a relationship with and with someone who hasn't confirmed with me that he is too.

 

 

No 'agenda'. Just different priorities. The last thing *I* want to do is dump some guy shortly after having sex with him because I found out something about his life or history that I consider unacceptable. Not a fun situation to be in.

joystickd Established Member

joystickd

Posted
Posted
Sorry, not me either. Has always been mutual for me too.

 

 

You'll just have to take it on face value that I don't like having sex with strangers, and I am looking for a relationship. So I consider it a waste of my time and theirs to have sex with someone I'm not interested in pursuing a relationship with and with someone who hasn't confirmed with me that he is too.

 

 

No 'agenda'. Just different priorities. The last thing *I* want to do is dump some guy shortly after having sex with him because I found out something about his life or history that I consider unacceptable. Not a fun situation to be in.

This monologue is just a big euphemism to serve as rationale for your negativity towards men. We don't see you checking women on their behavior all you do is shyte on men

Haydn Established Member

Haydn

Posted
Posted

What would be not acceptable in his history? I am 32 and most women i have had serious RS have been at least 5 to 8 years older than me. I do not understand. What is the issue? If you like someone and they like you, you has a series of tests they must pass? What happened to you to make feel like this? We are not all bad.

 

 

Sorry, not me either. Has always been mutual for me too.

 

 

You'll just have to take it on face value that I don't like having sex with strangers, and I am looking for a relationship. So I consider it a waste of my time and theirs to have sex with someone I'm not interested in pursuing a relationship with and with someone who hasn't confirmed with me that he is too.

 

 

No 'agenda'. Just different priorities. The last thing *I* want to do is dump some guy shortly after having sex with him because I found out something about his life or history that I consider unacceptable. Not a fun situation to be in.

  • Like 3
RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

Posted
Posted
This monologue is just a big euphemism to serve as rationale for your negativity towards men. We don't see you checking women on their behavior all you do is shyte on men

 

 

Oh, waaaaaa. Not every woman is going to look the other way on a man's sexual past, or lack of financial responsibility, or fetishes, or dating history, or lots of other things she hasn't done or is not burdened by. Get over it.

 

 

Just because lots of men in my preferred age range happen to have this 'baggage' doesn't mean I have to settle for it or have sex with them. Call that a poor attitude if you prefer, but lots of guys wouldn't settle for it either if they were in my shoes.

joystickd Established Member

joystickd

Posted
Posted
Oh, waaaaaa. Not every woman is going to look the other way on a man's sexual past, or lack of financial responsibility, or fetishes, or dating history, or lots of other things she hasn't done or is not burdened by. Get over it.

 

 

Just because lots of men in my preferred age range happen to have this 'baggage' doesn't mean I have to settle for it or have sex with them. Call that a poor attitude if you prefer, but lots of guys wouldn't settle for it either if they were in my shoes.

Cut the crap. We all have standard but its a big damn difference between what most people have and what you do. Everyone seen your opinions so don't downplay it like you are doing what everyone else does. It's a big difference on advice you give it's almost like you think you are the shyte because you make a man wait and look down on other women that don't follow the fringe female way to date. We have all noticed that most women on here that are happy don't subscribe to your shyte. How can you even hope to have a man when you shyte on men every chance you get?

Hell your monologues shyting on men are pornography. We all don't have some agenda. Our intentions are known and the things is we happen to not want to operate the way you want us too and that irks you to the fullest.

RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

Posted
Posted

Not sure what some of the above posts have to do with the topic.

 

 

Also, for a bunch of people who claim to be 'age-blind', you sure are wound tight about trying to find out mine.

 

 

Why is that? Could it be that you aren't as age-blind as you think you are?

 

 

I for one will likely stop referring to people's ages when talking about dating, and instead talk about relative experience. That to me seems to have more relevance to compatibility and potentially negative dynamics when there are large gaps in that... that also gets at my core concerns when it comes to lots of older men who seek to date younger women. The life experience gap. This thread has been useful for that.

 

 

Don't believe I'll stop sharing my opinion on what a woman is giving up that she might not be aware of when she dates a much older man though. Regardless of experience.

Keenly Established Member

Keenly

Posted
Posted
Oh, waaaaaa. Not every woman is going to look the other way on a man's sexual past, or lack of financial responsibility, or fetishes, or dating history, or lots of other things she hasn't done or is not burdened by. Get over it.

 

 

Just because lots of men in my preferred age range happen to have this 'baggage' doesn't mean I have to settle for it or have sex with them. Call that a poor attitude if you prefer, but lots of guys wouldn't settle for it either if they were in my shoes.

 

You are describing people that wouldn't even be attracted to each other in then first place.....

 

 

You're a pretty judgmental person from what I've gathered, ams what I don't understand is how you can try and have it both ways...

 

You scoff at men for judging by looks, and meanwhile your judging everything from finances to what flavor of milk he liked in 3rd grade.

 

Do you not see the irony?

  • Like 5
123321 Established Member

123321

Posted
Posted
Funny thing is there are plenty of men that like older women. I think these women would be pleasantly surprised

 

One of the core issues is simply that women are the ones who, for the most part, want a long term monogamous commitment. 27yo dude nailing 47yo gal isn't likely to be "that guy", and thus not likely to, in the long run, give her what she wants.

 

And admit it or not, she knows it.

 

Before I hear a lot of screeching, look in this site and see who is complaining about "he won't commit" vs "she won't commit".

joystickd Established Member

joystickd

Posted
Posted
You are describing people that wouldn't even be attracted to each other in then first place.....

 

 

You're a pretty judgmental person from what I've gathered, ams what I don't understand is how you can try and have it both ways...

 

You scoff at men for judging by looks, and meanwhile your judging everything from finances to what flavor of milk he liked in 3rd grade.

 

Do you not see the irony?

 

You forgot if you have a certain verbiage on here then you are a player :lmao:

RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

Posted
Posted
You're a pretty judgmental person from what I've gathered, ams what I don't understand is how you can try and have it both ways...

 

You scoff at men for judging by looks, and meanwhile your judging everything from finances to what flavor of milk he liked in 3rd grade.

 

Do you not see the irony?

 

 

I'm not having anything both ways. Seems there are plenty of men here who go after younger women for reasons that go beyond looks. Those reasons were stated ad nauseum up thread.

 

 

The only irony I see are the men who get their panties in a twist when they are judged for the same things they judge women for... looks, age, sexual history, etc.

 

 

If you are personally insecure about your finances or sexual history, that's not my problem. I haven't been irresponsible in either respect, and so don't feel the need to settle for men who have.

RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

Posted
Posted
One of the core issues is simply that women are the ones who, for the most part, want a long term monogamous commitment. 27yo dude nailing 47yo gal isn't likely to be "that guy", and thus not likely to, in the long run, give her what she wants.

 

And admit it or not, she knows it.

 

Before I hear a lot of screeching, look in this site and see who is complaining about "he won't commit" vs "she won't commit".

 

 

... and most 47 year old men nailing a 27 year old woman aren't going to get a commitment out of her either. According to the marriage stats.

 

 

The only difference is that one is currently considered more socially acceptable than the other.

 

 

But that seems to be changing as more and more women decide not to have children, have sizeable incomes of their own, and decide they don't need to screw an older man (at least not long term) in order to reach their goals in life.

joystickd Established Member

joystickd

Posted
Posted
One of the core issues is simply that women are the ones who, for the most part, want a long term monogamous commitment. 27yo dude nailing 47yo gal isn't likely to be "that guy", and thus not likely to, in the long run, give her what she wants.

 

And admit it or not, she knows it.

 

Before I hear a lot of screeching, look in this site and see who is complaining about "he won't commit" vs "she won't commit".

 

Women know with younger men they can't give them kids. If it's a man that doesn't want kids then she will commit.

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