If MM told BW we just had an inappropriate friendship, why is she stalking me on FB?

[browndog319]

Pierre,

I did take that rather well, didn't I. I guess I'm what men would call a "good egg." I reall am a perfect OW!!!!

 

I nearly spit my Diet DP on my laptop screen when you said give it a year, he'll be back. He'll be two Viagras old and I'm already pretty old. A year seems CRAZY. Haha!!!

 

I needed a laugh. I think I'm going to drink a lot tonight. My DD is at her dads and I'm meeting some friends out at the shore where I'm sharing a house for the summer. I do an okay job living my life - there is even a very attractive guy who has expressed interest. Maybe I'll try to put my heart aside and remember that I am in fact SINGLE and free to meet eligible men.

[browndog319]

Whether or not his lying in MC will cause their M to fail is unknown, but my best bet is that his lying is simply to protect himself and not upset the apple cart too much. If he can keep the M and the A going, he hasn't really lost anything. AND, he's not having to do the REALLY hard work that will come with the discovery of a full blown A...or the fall out of the M. I think this is his goal. Otherwise, why not come clean with the W and make a choice? Or rather, let a choice be made for him as they tend to prefer.

 

I do not believe the wife totally believes him. I think she suspects or fears there is more and is trying to find out. Although I was an OW, I was a BW at one point in my life, and I can tell you this is one of the worst feelings there is. The "knowing" or feeling/fearing there is more, but not being able to put your finger on it is maddening. You question your own instincts, and sometimes fear you're simply paranoid. She's being hypervigilant right now because she's afraid if she closes her eyes for one minute, she's going to miss finding the piece of the puzzle she's looking for. As much as discovery of an A hurts, the validation brings a certain peace.

 

I'm not trying to make you feel bad...just stating what my experience was. What he's doing to her is cruel. He may think he's protecting her, but he's not. The best thing these guys can do for EVERYONE involved is be honest and let everyone make informed decisions. It's mentally exhausting to be where his W is now, and being the OW (IME) is limiting and painful as well. The only one fully benefiting from this scenario is the MP.

 

Thank you, SadinTexas. This is really good info. I've actually been reading a lot on an infidelity board to see what it would be like to be in her shoes and I have a lot of empathy. The thing is, I think we would have probably been friends in another situations.

 

When MM and I have talked since DDay I told him it was grossly unfair of him to not let her have the information to make a decision about what she was signing up for, what she was forgiving, without all of the information. He keeps saying, I'm just stopping the damage. My argument is, "Look, the damage is done. You just don't want to see the devastation."

 

I won't speak to him at all this weekend I'm sure. He goes back onto the road I think on Monday. So maybe we'll speak then. If we do, I'll give him the ultimatum then.

[waytogo]

Pierre,

I did take that rather well, didn't I. I guess I'm what men would call a "good egg." I reall am a perfect OW!!!!

 

I nearly spit my Diet DP on my laptop screen when you said give it a year, he'll be back. He'll be two Viagras old and I'm already pretty old. A year seems CRAZY. Haha!!!

 

I needed a laugh. I think I'm going to drink a lot tonight. My DD is at her dads and I'm meeting some friends out at the shore where I'm sharing a house for the summer. I do an okay job living my life - there is even a very attractive guy who has expressed interest. Maybe I'll try to put my heart aside and remember that I am in fact SINGLE and free to meet eligible men.

 

Absolutely Brown! Who knows, maybe this guy will end up being so distracting you'll say M-who? Good luck!

[Emme]

When will you be giving your married man an ultimatum?

[2sunny]

how can she check your FB - you must not have your privacy settings extremely tight. why not?

 

you must want her seeing every little thing you do - since you allow anyone to view your page.

 

YOU can change that! why haven't you?

 

IF you want to stop pretending and lying, simply call and tell her everything he won't tell.

 

she deserves to know what you two have been doing behind her back - without her consent. be honest.

[fooled once]

I never thought of that, but when you put it like that it does piss me off. You're right. Thank you for sharing your experience to help other people in the thick of it.

 

Ironically, I'm not docile in the rest of my life. I'm scrappy as hell.

 

Many OW say the same thing - they are strong, confident, etc., yet the MM makes them wishy, gooey and obedient. When you are firmly out of this affair and some time has passed, you will look back and want to smack yourself for ever being so docile and compliant while he 'used' you.

 

Many ow say that same thing.........including me. For someone I'm not intimate with, I'm a take no crap sorta gal. It's about not having good boundaries and not understanding what someone really loving us should be.

 

Yep

 

We do work together. His boss figured it out and confronted him. But not as a "you're in big trouble" but as a "man to man" thing. I love his boss and the three of us actually have a great professional relationship.

 

There is no policy we are breaking as his boss said. His boss figured it out at a dinner and how affectionate MM was to me, not the other way around. He told him that if we we a thing, be careful and discreet, but we weren't breaking rules as there is no direct reporting line. And we do great work together and are professional in front of MM's employees. Hell, his team wants to throw me a 40th birthday party next month and they have no idea.

 

Ethical dilemma - a male friend from HS thinks his wife should know and has offered to email her thru FB and tell her MM is lying, we have been in love for a year and that there are details she needs to know. His story will be that he has been trying to get together with me but I keep denying him bc of MM and he's tired of it so maybe if MM is out of the way, he'll have a shot. I know I'm being passive letting it happen this way, but part of me does feel she should know. Is this wrong to let him do it?

 

Just because there is no direct line of reporting and just because his boss gave it 2 thumbs up doesn't mean it is accepted or appropriate. So when the rest of the company gets wind of it, and someone tells his wife, and she finds out the company knew and 'allowed' the office to be used as a cheating spot, she could have grounds for you being terminated; no matter how good you are at your job. The company WILL make someone the scape goat and if he is higher than you or has more longevity, you will be tossed out.

 

The only consequences I'm afraid of are actually having the awful answer that he really didn't love me. Or didn't love me enough. Or doing something that causes him pain - I really think he needs to be the one to confess the details, be honest and up front. I don't want to tell her. I really don't.

 

I'The

 

He doesn't love you enough. He is protecting his wife. He isn't telling her the truth. Like others said, he had the opportunity to come clean and he wussed out and said you were some girl at work who is infatuated with him and while he thinks you do a good job, you are a homely girl and he feels sorry for you (just using these words as an example ... words that have been used before when a MM was busted). He will tell her he has tried to be nice to you because you seem so lonely, but you aren't getting his message.

 

Yet to your face, he tells you he love you. Yet he disrespects you by hiding you, disrespecting you, minimizing you to his wife. He chose her. He chose his marriage. Why? Why would he do that if he loved you so much? Please don't use this religion or any other baloney as an excuse. He had the PERFECT opportunity and he instead threw you under the bus. Why is that okay with you? Why is it okay that he did that?

 

YOur MM has already made his choice. He lied to his wife about the nature of your relationship.

 

He doesn't want her to know because he isn't going to leave her.Why would he when he knows he has you just where he wants you. IF he had wanted to leave, he would have come clean and told the wife. Instead he made feeble explanations.

 

As for worrying about hurting him, DON'T. He won't worry about hurting you and if you hang around, who knows what will happen.

 

If this woman has half a brain, she will know that he has lied to her. She is trying to get information. He obviously has avoided the issue , so she seems to be doing it her way.

 

If she phones you and you wish to tell her, then by all means do so. Does she not deserve an opportunity to know what has been happening to her and her life? How about an opportunity to make an informed decision about her future? He isn't giving her that much respect.

 

He hasn't given you any respect either. He said you were virtually nothing in his life.

 

Gentlegirl

 

Great post Gentle. I completely agree.

[2sunny]

he won't be around all weekend = because he's with his wife! think about how sad that is for you. you could be enjoying a nice weekend with a MAN!

 

I won't speak to him at all this weekend I'm sure. He goes back onto the road I think on Monday. So maybe we'll speak then. If we do, I'll give him the ultimatum then.

 

i don't see any reason to speak to him ever again. seriously... he ditched you - when he had an opportunity to be honest and leave her for you = but HE'S NOT LEAVING... he wants you to stay quiet and be his secret.

 

that's just not enough... and you should want more for yourself - you deserve that!

 

set FB to ultra private now!

[TurboGirl]

Fair enough. I go back and forth on this. My friend just thinks she should know. But then I hate the cowardice of it.

 

Not your "friend's" business! Tell him to butt out. Obviously she suspects, but if someone gives her confirmation, she might come after you. And I mean personally... not just on facebook or making phone calls.

 

And set your facebook page to private, unless you are enjoying the drama of it all.

 

Why on earth would you even want to speak to your xMM again? He's on the road... leave him there! :bunny:

 

time to move on. There are other men out there, available ones who will bring you happiness and companionships, not this drama and BS...

[sandrawg]

That's called "codependency." You might want to read Melody Beattie's book, Codependent No More.

 

But I am one of those people who unfortunately puts people she loves ahead of her, very much to her own detriment. And I have to stop doing that for someone who is not putting me first.

[Fight4Me]

You've received some great advice and perspective so far. I'm a fBW, but I'm posting to you as one woman to another.

 

You mentioned him drinking to the point of passing out and/or making promises and going back on them, etc. This raised some red flags for me, and I'm curious if you've had any concerns about that. It might be easy to pass it off as someone who is just drinking because of stress or circumstances, but there may be a lot he has hidden from you. He obviously has an affinity for secrecy and avoidance, so it stands to reason, kwim?

 

What I'm getting at is his personal brokenness seems to run deep and is likely complicated and messy. If his wife kicks him out and he comes to you by default (which you would resent eventually), you'll end up inheriting all his baggage. As the saying goes, wherever you go, you take yourself with you.

 

You seem like a very intelligent, accomplished woman, so I would suggest that you take some time to really think about what you want and what you deserve. Do you want someone healthy and decisive, or someone who dodges, trickle-truths, gaslights, dictates your privacy settings, and has chained himself to a titanium fence?

 

If I can play armchair psychologist for a moment, your posts seem to indicate that you are putting off the impending pain of a full and final ending. Let's face it, nothing is more painful than losing someone you love, but you already know that he isn't showing you love in ACTION. If he were single, would this be acceptable to you?

 

One last thing, please make a conscious effort to take care of yourself physically and mentally. When we're under this kind of stress, we tend to neglect ourselves and often forget to eat and/or drink enough water. You should go out and have a good time, but try to remember that drowning your sorrows impairs your judgment AND your health. You need to focus on what is truly good for you.

 

I sincerely wish you the best.

[waytogo]

You've received some great advice and perspective so far. I'm a fBW, but I'm posting to you as one woman to another.

 

You mentioned him drinking to the point of passing out and/or making promises and going back on them, etc. This raised some red flags for me, and I'm curious if you've had any concerns about that. It might be easy to pass it off as someone who is just drinking because of stress or circumstances, but there may be a lot he has hidden from you. He obviously has an affinity for secrecy and avoidance, so it stands to reason, kwim?

 

What I'm getting at is his personal brokenness seems to run deep and is likely complicated and messy. If his wife kicks him out and he comes to you by default (which you would resent eventually), you'll end up inheriting all his baggage. As the saying goes, wherever you go, you take yourself with you.

 

You seem like a very intelligent, accomplished woman, so I would suggest that you take some time to really think about what you want and what you deserve. Do you want someone healthy and decisive, or someone who dodges, trickle-truths, gaslights, dictates your privacy settings, and has chained himself to a titanium fence?

 

If I can play armchair psychologist for a moment, your posts seem to indicate that you are putting off the impending pain of a full and final ending. Let's face it, nothing is more painful than losing someone you love, but you already know that he isn't showing you love in ACTION. If he were single, would this be acceptable to you?

 

One last thing, please make a conscious effort to take care of yourself physically and mentally. When we're under this kind of stress, we tend to neglect ourselves and often forget to eat and/or drink enough water. You should go out and have a good time, but try to remember that drowning your sorrows impairs your judgment AND your health. You need to focus on what is truly good for you.

 

I sincerely wish you the best.

 

This is a great post. OP imho, does have everything it's going to take to free herself from this. She may well be here giving good advice on the level of WWIU:) in a short time.

 

Personally, it took more than 1 day to decide being in an A wasn't fair to BW, me and I may get resistance on this 1, but not fair to xMM either. If OP can't do it today or tomorrow, I believe she will do it sooner than later. Hopefully, she will continue to be made comfortable to post here as she works thru it. My senses say this is a 'good egg'

[Got it]

 

 

Just because there is no direct line of reporting and just because his boss gave it 2 thumbs up doesn't mean it is accepted or appropriate. So when the rest of the company gets wind of it, and someone tells his wife, and she finds out the company knew and 'allowed' the office to be used as a cheating spot, she could have grounds for you being terminated; no matter how good you are at your job. The company WILL make someone the scape goat and if he is higher than you or has more longevity, you will be tossed out.

 

.

 

 

I am sorry but you are incorrect. First off, if there is no policy in place to disallow dating, affairs, etc a company is limited on termination. That is asking for a morality policy that many companies are not implementing. Also, there have been some court cases in regards to said policies, discrimination of marital status, invasion of privacy that have ruled against said companies. So that is false thinking assuming the company will terminate ESPECIALLY if she is the subordinate.

 

I would argue that if she was terminated over him, she would have a case with the EEOC against the company on why they would choose to eliminate her over him. If he has a higher position, he has more responsibility to the company and then said transgression weighs heavier on him than her.

 

I am scratching my head on how if the wife found out that the company "allowed" it how she would have any power to get someone terminated. If the wife is not an employee of the company, why would the company care? If it disrupted things at work, yes. If there was a transgression of a policy, yes. But I don't know many companies where the spouse has any authority or power unless they too are an employee.

 

In regards to dating polices in companies:

"A prohibition against certain types of relationships ....that prohibits dating and relationships but only among certain categories of employees. This approach is fraught with legal and operational peril.

Consider a policy that prohibits “adulterous affairs.” While this may have some moral high ground, it discriminates against employees based upon marital status and, in doing so, opens up the company to lawsuits."

Edited July 24, 2011 by Got it

[fooled once]

I am sorry but you are incorrect. First off, if there is no policy in place to disallow dating, affairs, etc a company is limited on termination. That is asking for a morality policy that many companies are not implementing. Also, there have been some court cases in regards to said policies, discrimination of marital status, invasion of privacy that have ruled against said companies. So that is false thinking assuming the company will terminate ESPECIALLY if she is the subordinate.

 

**Sorry, but I work in HR. I know what I am talking about. They won't put "mistress" as the reason for termination, but mark my words, the smallest mistake will be the cause for termination. Many companies DO have unwritten morality policies - read the vision statements many companies have. Also, most companies have an EEOC hotline and/or a hotline for reporting abuse, fraud and other company issues anonymously. I watched a man lose his job for flirty with a co-worker; she brought a sexual harassment charge against him. As much as you don't want to believe it, there are companies that will NOT tolerate cheating in the workplace, nor do they want to have the publicity of being a place that encourages/approves of sex in the workplace.

 

I would argue that if she was terminated over him, she would have a case with the EEOC against the company on why they would choose to eliminate her over him. If he has a higher position, he has more responsibility to the company and then said transgression weighs heavier on him than her.

 

**As I stated above, it won't be listed as "having an affair with a co-worker" on her termination paperwork. That's a given. Sorry you didn't understand that. Let's go on the assumption that he does have a higher position; it also means he is possibly a more valued employee and it is easier to replace her than him. Additionally, I would bet the MM would toss her under the bus if it came down to him or her being terminated.

 

I am scratching my head on how if the wife found out that the company "allowed" it how she would have any power to get someone terminated. If the wife is not an employee of the company, why would the company care? If it disrupted things at work, yes. If there was a transgression of a policy, yes. But I don't know many companies where the spouse has any authority or power unless they too are an employee.

 

**A person can subpoena someone from the company - the guy who talked to the MM about the affair and knew it was going on. If you don't understand how much a company does NOT want to have to deal with the kind of publicity that could come from an accusation of workplace inappropriate conduct, I don't know how to explain it to you. Companies have reputations to uphold. Another example is a manager at XYZ company is arrested on Saturday night for domestic violence. He has to report it at his job on Monday. He can and will be fired for his actions on his personal time.

 

Also, if a person holds a government security clearance, and there is infidelity, the person WILL lose their clearance and will NOT be granted another one. I know this as fact, FYI.

 

In regards to dating polices in companies:

"A prohibition against certain types of relationships ....that prohibits dating and relationships but only among certain categories of employees. This approach is fraught with legal and operational peril.

Consider a policy that prohibits “adulterous affairs.” While this may have some moral high ground, it discriminates against employees based upon marital status and, in doing so, opens up the company to lawsuits."

 

**Answers in bold. I am not going to thread jack this any longer. You can believe what you want, I can go by my professional experience working in HR for the last 17 years.

[browndog319]

Absolutely Brown! Who knows, maybe this guy will end up being so distracting you'll say M-who? Good luck!

 

Had a very nice time with this guy - he was definitely a distraction and a lot of fun. Naturally, he's got some issues - he is the child of a narcissisist (sp?) and his response to this is to disappear occasionally even if he is really interested in someone. He told me this himself and said he would disappoint me, even if he didn't want to and he was seeing a counselor because he was tired of being that guy. But he is SINGLE and very attractive, and the attention and ability to be OPEN was really freeing.

[browndog319]

how can she check your FB - you must not have your privacy settings extremely tight. why not?

 

you must want her seeing every little thing you do - since you allow anyone to view your page.

 

YOU can change that! why haven't you?

 

IF you want to stop pretending and lying, simply call and tell her everything he won't tell.

 

she deserves to know what you two have been doing behind her back - without her consent. be honest.

 

I have checked my FB settings and they are tight. I have NO idea how she can see them. It freaks me out. I told him a few weeks ago I blocked her because I HATE drama, and he got worried that she would know he told me that she was viewing my FB page. So I basically agreed to be watched.

 

If she asks me, I will tell her. But I don't feel I should contact her. In fact, I've seen on some sites where BSs go that the OW contacting them is considered awful. And if I do it, I need to be sure that my motivation is for the right thing - not the vindictiveness that may be the assumed response to my motivation.

 

His wife may not believe me bc if he did serve me up as someone with a crush, he could always minimize it as, "see, I've been ignoring her and this is her being spiteful to break us up!" I'm not sure what good it would do.

 

That is why I will tell the truth if asked, but I don't think me telling proactively would have a good result.

[SoleMate]

The sooner you see him for what he really is.......and walk, the less grief you'll face, now and down the road.

Please, listen to the very wise advice from bent.

[browndog319]

When will you be giving your married man an ultimatum?

 

When I speak to him. I haven't spoken to him - although I saw that I had an Email from him last night.

 

I'm really proud of myself that I had my phone in my back and was having a good time and didn't even think to check Email until this morning. It was pretty nervy of him to send on a Saturday - he hasn't done that for a few weeks....

 

I'll let you know when we speak. Thank you for staying on me about this and keeping me accountable!

[browndog319]

Not your "friend's" business! Tell him to butt out. Obviously she suspects, but if someone gives her confirmation, she might come after you. And I mean personally... not just on facebook or making phone calls.

 

I talked to him and he isn't going to do it - it is the coward's way and I really don't want to be a coward. If she does come after me for real, I do deserve it.

[browndog319]

That's called "codependency." You might want to read Melody Beattie's book, Codependent No More.

 

I'll order it from Amazon - I'd never thought of myself as this but perhaps I am... I think I need to see a counselor on my own.

[browndog319]

You've received some great advice and perspective so far. I'm a fBW, but I'm posting to you as one woman to another.

 

You mentioned him drinking to the point of passing out and/or making promises and going back on them, etc. This raised some red flags for me, and I'm curious if you've had any concerns about that. It might be easy to pass it off as someone who is just drinking because of stress or circumstances, but there may be a lot he has hidden from you. He obviously has an affinity for secrecy and avoidance, so it stands to reason, kwim?

 

This is a really good point and I will admit that it scares me. His BW is actually the daughter of an alcoholic- he knows he has a propensity for addiction. We have talked about this a lot and it stems from him losing his best friend 5 years ago to cancer. That seems to also be when his marriage started suffering.

 

What I'm getting at is his personal brokenness seems to run deep and is likely complicated and messy. If his wife kicks him out and he comes to you by default (which you would resent eventually), you'll end up inheriting all his baggage. As the saying goes, wherever you go, you take yourself with you.

I know - but I also feel like if I was an additional nail in the coffin of his life, I should be there for him if it goes that way. But I do worry that I will always feel like he was clinging to me for support and not choosing me. But I would feel guilty for being one of the accomplices. Does that make sense?

 

You seem like a very intelligent, accomplished woman, so I would suggest that you take some time to really think about what you want and what you deserve. Do you want someone healthy and decisive, or someone who dodges, trickle-truths, gaslights, dictates your privacy settings, and has chained himself to a titanium fence?

Thank you - I'd like to think, recent history excluded, that I am those things. I want to have a legitimate relationship with MM. I feel like there are many things between us that would be really an excellent match. But I have been very hurt by him and I can't bear to be hurt anymore.

 

Can you explain the "titanium fence" reference? I'm very intrigued by this and want to understand it.

If I can play armchair psychologist for a moment, your posts seem to indicate that you are putting off the impending pain of a full and final ending. Let's face it, nothing is more painful than losing someone you love, but you already know that he isn't showing you love in ACTION. If he were single, would this be acceptable to you?

No. I would not accept this. I am probably putting it off accepting the pain. And you are right.

One last thing, please make a conscious effort to take care of yourself physically and mentally. When we're under this kind of stress, we tend to neglect ourselves and often forget to eat and/or drink enough water. You should go out and have a good time, but try to remember that drowning your sorrows impairs your judgment AND your health. You need to focus on what is truly good for you.

I do my best to get plenty of exercise and food - I always make myself eat something at mealtimes. My appetite is better than it was. And you're right about drinking - I don't do it too often, but sometimes if does feel good to blow off some steam.

 

Thank you for this information and support. I really appreciate it!

[browndog319]

This is a great post. OP imho, does have everything it's going to take to free herself from this. She may well be here giving good advice on the level of WWIU:) in a short time.

 

Personally, it took more than 1 day to decide being in an A wasn't fair to BW, me and I may get resistance on this 1, but not fair to xMM either. If OP can't do it today or tomorrow, I believe she will do it sooner than later. Hopefully, she will continue to be made comfortable to post here as she works thru it. My senses say this is a 'good egg'

 

Thank you, I try to be! I want to get beyond this. I really do - as I said, it was nice to spend time with an available, albeit somewhat screwed up man, OPENLY. OPEN is the new sexy... Is that weird?????? That is my revelation from the weekend.

 

Interestingly, there is no part of me that wants MM to know about this - I don't want him to get jealous and act like he is fighting for me to stop me from moving on. I also don't want to hurt him. I also don't want to do something hurtful and deal-breaking with the new guy so that I get sucked into the cycle because I feel like I can't have normal relationships. I'm actually INTERESTED... this is a nice feeling. People in our house think we're cute together.

 

I do feel guilty about MM, though. What if he winds up getting thrown out because of what I helped with and I'm not there? There is this little voice in my head telling me what a jerk I am - but then I talk myself into the fact that he needs to be responsible for his actions and that he was the one who ate cake for so long... Isn't it time for me to have some cake? A girl's gotta eat, right?

[browndog319]

**Answers in bold. I am not going to thread jack this any longer. You can believe what you want, I can go by my professional experience working in HR for the last 17 years.

 

Good advice, thank you for this info!

[browndog319]

Please, listen to the very wise advice from bent.

 

Thank you, I will.

[pureinheart]

I am new to this forum - just got out of a year long A with MM I work with. He is field based, I am HQ so luckily I don't see him daily, but our names come up a lot to the other so it's hard to move on. He got drunk about a month ago after emailing me all night on a Saturday, passed out and left his email open. BW woke up, shut it down, but not before she printed out the very affectionate emails between the two of us. He wanted to virtually spoon me and give me TLC because I had an injury.

 

The next day she laid into him, asked if we were in love, screwing, whatever, if he wanted out. He said no to all of them and promised to never speak to me again. He saw me two weeks later. They have gone to MC where he continues to admit inappropriate friendship nothing more.

 

Since she caught the Emails (second time, BTW, first time in January), she has somehow been able to see every one of my FB statuses, pictures, etc. EVER. MM doesn't have FB, so it's not thru his account (have no idea how she can do this). She also is on my LinkedIn page twice a day (I can see this because I see viewed by anonymous LinkedIn user). She has called my home and cell several times by blocking her number.

 

MM thinks she believes him. I think if she did she wouldn't be stalking me. I am tired of being stalked and its been a month and it hasn't let up. And they've been in MC. Why would she stalk me if she believes him? Is there another reason? Should I think there is any chance that she is potentially just looking for info to toss him? I have been uber discreet...

 

Thoughts?

 

Hey BD, I briefly read your thread and want to address the stalking. You can do something about it BTW. I would go to you local cop shop and find out what needs to be done in your area. If you get nothing from the cop shop search on line because there are laws that do protect against this sort of thing. Even though she blocks her number, her phone provider has the records and you can prove that your house was called from her location. The FB, I'm not sure how to track her on that.

 

Hang in there girl...you handle yourself well.

[browndog319]

Hey BD, I briefly read your thread and want to address the stalking. You can do something about it BTW. I would go to you local cop shop and find out what needs to be done in your area. If you get nothing from the cop shop search on line because there are laws that do protect against this sort of thing. Even though she blocks her number, her phone provider has the records and you can prove that your house was called from her location. The FB, I'm not sure how to track her on that.

 

Hang in there girl...you handle yourself well.

 

This is good information - and I could probably figure out their phone provider.

 

Thanks for the confidence building - I try to handle myself well!