xxoooo Posted July 24, 2011 Share Posted July 24, 2011 (edited) Briefly giving you guys a bit of background, i dated this guy for 4 months(first love) and he stopped talking to me (rather completely ignored me) 3 months ago. I thought we were very happy together and he said a lot of times im very special and we have a lot in common and we're unbelievably compatible and stuff..and we had the same sense of humor and we had a good time every time we went out on a date.. And he liked me not controlling or jeally and we were just getting to know eAch otherrr. And he asked me to be his gf and stuff. Things were goin really well! But as his work got busier and he got stressed out about it and i was havig hard times with my school work as well, and i needed him more but he was not available to listen to me. These things happened a few times. Seriously ts not that we had a huge fight or nothing, we never argued if my memory serves me right! and without giving me an opportunity to try to solve these little falling outs, he just ignored my txt, phone calls and thats that. Its not even that i wanted him back even tho i wanted to be with him..i just needed to talk whats wrong and if hes not willing to be with me i could have let him go and wished him nth but good luck. I just wanted to have a proper closer so that itd be easier for us to move on.. But he neverrrr answered me even once and he deleted me on skype and everything. Literally he shunned me away from his life and i was just left there stooding in limbo...crying much and hurt so bad. I just didt know what was wtong and what i did not to deserve a chance to say byee.. I think its bc he always has thought me as a nice sweet lil girl. Guess he didnt wanna or couldnt deal with breaking up with a girl whos been just nice To him, and guess he didnt wanna see me crying and stuff. I understand but hes deff a coward and he was soo mean to me:( One more important thing we didnt have sex and my ex was wating for me to be ready for it.(im a univ student, its Not that im a high school girl or even younger that thst so this might be critical why this relationship didnt last) Its just bc of my personal experience that i slept with a guy before and obvi it turned out that he just used me and i had my heart broken so bad. So i just needed more time to trust my ex and he agreed on waiting. Well i thought he was gonna be freaked out but rather, he was very sweet and said "it seems like his previous relationshoips failed bc he didnt wait for the right time, and this time he wants to do it when it feels the right moment for both of us and stuff.." Guess it could be another reason for him to leave me like that?? I feel bad i was so ready to take another step as in relationship even tho its too slow ha ha So im in 2 months of nc waiting for him to come around to talk to me. I even wanna befriend him. Just this doesnt feel right to end the relatiomship without saying anything and giving reasons. My friend said hes never gonna come back to me despise my NC bc we didnt have sex. He would have nth to miss in the relationship...haha it was hurting but i think realistically it has a point too bc the relationship lasts along with both physical and mental connection. Sorry for this long thrEad but i really need some advice. I miss him and i even want him as a friend...but i dont know how that can ever happen to me. Or should i just keep Nc and try to get over him bc what he did was very low and shows that he never really took me seriously??? Thank you for reading this through!! Edited July 24, 2011 by xxoooo Link to post Share on other sites
Almond_Joy Posted July 24, 2011 Share Posted July 24, 2011 Hi, My ex did the same thing. Just completely cut me out of his life. We'd had sex, though, and had been together for ten months instead of 4. I'd say maintain no contact. It won't help you to try and see him. Like the more you push yourself on him, the more likely he is to pull farther away (if that's even possible from ignoring someone). Just focus on your self and living life without him, and if he decides to come talk to you he knows how to get a hold of you. Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGal Posted July 24, 2011 Share Posted July 24, 2011 I agree with Almond Joy, maintain no contact. Today makes 6 weeks for me since my ex broke up with me... in an email! We were together for 6 months and were very happy, but a couple fights caused him to do this. I tried to call and text just after the break and was ignored. The last text I sent was over 2 weeks ago because I want the rest of my things back, again I was ignored. I will not try to contact again because being ignored will only make me hurt more. And, it gives them power and an ego boost to think you still care. Also, a man is either going to be decent to you or not. It has nothing to do with sex, so don't think it does. You should not have to go out of your comfort zone to make a relationship work. Stick to what is best for you! Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
flitzanu Posted July 25, 2011 Share Posted July 25, 2011 from past experience, when someone does something like that, i means they've likely gone back to a past partner and just don't have the decency to tell you. Link to post Share on other sites
hew Posted July 25, 2011 Share Posted July 25, 2011 Hi there! ok so im in a similar situation to yours. me and my boyfriend ended yesterday.... i think? I got upset because we had plans to hangout and he ditched me for his friends and another girl and i "overeacted"... He wouldnt answer texts, said he didnt want to see me and ignored my calls and everything else under the sun. I finally sent a text saying thats it were done! and he said he would come get his things at 6 o'clock yesterday and give me mine, but he was a no show. I discovered he went out drinking with his friends and this new girl was there im pretty sure. Also he didnt call to say he couldnt make, just left me hanging. I love the kid to death, dont get me wrong, but you dont do that to someone. And although he thinks its me thats in the wrong, i know im not. and you arent either. you will be okay, i know that might not be what will get you by, but you have to believe that when you hear it. It hurts, i know the feeling in your stomach and throat. That lump of energy you dont want there. That feeling of despair and lonliness. Its horrible and you feel alone. But your not, think of all the people posting on here and so many other websites, and people who dont post anything at all. So people people are hurting just like you, and me. Time heals everything, it really does. But by the looks of it, you dont deserve to be waiting around. Get your life in control, do what makes you happy. Go shopping! seriously by yourself stuff haha... youll feel better People change, and its a hard thing to accept. But you will also change and realize different things and different hopes for your future. Dont ever allow someone to make you feel a certain way. You are in control of your life, and you make sure it stays that way. Best of luck, and remember, im here with you too Link to post Share on other sites
Author xxoooo Posted July 29, 2011 Author Share Posted July 29, 2011 (edited) After I read you girls' replies, I maintained NC. well, nothing happened after, I mean we still do not talk to each other. But obviously i think you guys encouraged me to make a right decision, bc now it feels easier to cope. and slowly i'm getting this idea that the relationship is over, and he was not the right one for me;) Thank you so much girls, seriously all of your comments meant a lot! Well, what my ex did was very shady and low haha, but I'm sure he's got his own reasons to have done that...and i am not going to figure out what that ever would be anymore.. i've had enough and I want to treat myself better It seems like there are many people suffering from the breakup issue...i'll just pray for all of you girls to be stronger and wiser from what you guys are going through....I mean i've been there and know how hard it could be :_( you know if its meant to be, you and your ex would get back.. and if it wasnt meant to be, i'm 100 percent sure that you'll find the right one anytime soon. Again thank you for everyone who made comments here<3 <3 <3 Edited July 29, 2011 by xxoooo Link to post Share on other sites
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