confused

[Bobby Dygytul]

Ok, i have this problem. I met this girl like 3 weeks ago. We hit it off pretty well. Im 23 and for some reason i have always liked younger girls. She is 16. I really like her alot and im highly attracted to her. When we first met like, she was crazy about me. I notice she has always got a bunch of friends over and alot of them are guys. She tells me that they are just friends and stuff. Well, last weekend, i went over to her house and we was chillin drinkin some beer and stuff, and she wanted to have sex. It was like 4:00 a.m. and i was really tired and i told her that. Well she insisted that we have sex, so i tried to, but my male organ was asleep. I told her that and that i was tired and wanted to go home and she said "what, so your gona just leave me like this?" I told her that i was sorry and that we can try again some other time. She sounded like she was cool with that. Well, we haven't talked much this week. I have got online a couple times and we I.M. each other and we would talk for a couple minutes, but i haven't called her on the phone and she hasn't me either. Ever since then she has been acting like she is mad or something. I got online last night and she was online and usually she always I.M.'s me first so i waited about 15 minutes and she never I.M me. So i I.M. her and said "what, you can't holla at me?" She was like "sorry i was going to" and i was like "aiight" and she said "what, are you mad or something" and i said "no" and she was like "aiight then" and she was kinda acting like a bitch. I might be just be trippin but she has acted different since that night. Help, i really like her and i don't want to lose her. Did i do something wrong? What should i do? Any kinda advise is appriciated.

[Larry]

Yo, like...homeboy...in the house...word, dis bitch be dissin yo ass. down wit O.P.P..

 

be pullin' da mad young hoochie

[Tony T]

Hey, this girl is a BABY. She is 16 years old. First, what is she doing with bunches of people at her home at 4 a.m. drinking beer. What kind of girl is she? What kind of family does she come from?

 

Many 16 year olds are extremely selfish and want what they want. If you can't furnish her sex on demand at 4 a.m. she is going elsewhere, OK. Maybe she felt rejected but I doubt it...she was pissed because she couldn't have what she wanted.

 

I know you like younger girls and there are many good reasons for that. But, maturity and selflessness are not among them. It may work out better when you are 40 and go for 32 year old women.

 

While you are still seeing 16 to 19 years olds especially, you will experience a great deal of immaturity. Young girls will seldom have empathy for your tiredness or anything else. They are extremely fickle. Your gal was probably having cybersex with five guys at once when you tried to IM her. That's probably why she didn't have time to IM you first or was upset with your interference.

 

If you must, enjoy your young chirpies for the time you can and move on. Also, be aware that in most states, a 23 year old man having sex with a minor child under the age of 18 is a third degree felony (the worst kind) and punishable by ten years to life in prison. In some areas, just fondling (petting) them in a dating situation, you can be charged with contributing to the deliquency of a minor. Check with your local prosecutor for the exact details, statute numbers, and sentencing guidelines.

 

Also, let her mama know most municipalities have laws providing for jailtime for letting her 16 year old drink beer.

 

This gal has got you where she wants you...be nice to her.

[Paulie]

Tony,

I agree with your entire post...but I don't understand your final comment- " be nice to her"

 

Why???

 

It sounds to me like this girl is nothing but trouble.

[Tony T]

It is absolutely necessary to be nice to a girl who, with the dial of a telephone, can cause your arrest and possible imprisonment for up to a period of life, depending on the laws of the particular state, for statuatory rape. That is why I suggested he be nice to her.

 

Statuatory rape is the act of having sexual intercourse with a person under the age of consent, 18 in most states, even if it is consensual. It is outright rape if it is forcible.

 

Now, is that a good enough reason???

[Paulie]

Yeah...I totally agree with you, if that's the reason.

 

But I would ultimately suggest that he have no contact with her whatsoever. Perhaps I misunderstood you, but come on Tony-

 

"Now is that good enough reason" is just a little confrontational-I was just questioning part of your post that might be easily misunderstood for your approval of the situation and an endorsement that he be outwardly nice to her. Like you say sometimes...maybe this is one of the limitations of the Internet-no tone of voice in your post.

 

Thank you for the clarification.

[Nina]

Ok, this is a bad situation. First of all, statutory rape. Secondly, STATUTORY RAPE. This means that you can be convited of rape if her parents or she chooses to talk to the police. This is a law in every state excpet Kentucky, I think. You can be convicted even if she consented to sex because according to the law, a 16 year old isn't capable of deciding if she can have sex with a man older than 18.

 

Also, as far as the situation goes, I agree with TOny. Teenaged girls are notoriously fickle. And self-centered. It's not a bad thing, it's a developmental stage and they grow out of it. All teenagers are like this. It has to do with developing physical brain structures. Being that you didn't satisfy her immediately upon erquest, she felt that you were rejecting her and reacted in an immature fashion, which is normal for her age.

 

I want to mention that men change physiologically around 21. They reach their sexual peak at around 17/18, and can have frequent erections and a lot of stamina, but this naturally decreases as time passes. So even at 23, you're sexual capabilities are different from those of a teenager.

[Deejette]

I don't think this is something to lose too much sleep over. It doesn't sound like a mutually supportive loving relationship. Even if it was about sexual attraction,`it didn't really happen for you. She doesn't sound like she is worth it and has a lot to learn before she can be a worthwhile girlfriend.

But I would ultimately suggest that he have no contact with her whatsoever. Perhaps I misunderstood you, but come on Tony- "Now is that good enough reason" is just a little confrontational-I was just questioning part of your post that might be easily misunderstood for your approval of the situation and an endorsement that he be outwardly nice to her. Like you say sometimes...maybe this is one of the limitations of the Internet-no tone of voice in your post.

 

Thank you for the clarification.

[Tony T]

Actually, I felt that my first response pretty much made it clear to this guy that he was not only barking up the wrong tree, but a dangerous one at that.

 

As far as my remark about my reason being enough, I guess I was trying more to be cute. I am not a confrontational person and have no reason to be. And besides, I consider you to be a great friend in these parts. You are just too sensitive. uppps....I didn't really mean that!!!

[Roger]

Check your attitude, Paulie was giving some good advice.

Actually, I felt that my first response pretty much made it clear to this guy that he was not only barking up the wrong tree, but a dangerous one at that. As far as my remark about my reason being enough, I guess I was trying more to be cute. I am not a confrontational person and have no reason to be. And besides, I consider you to be a great friend in these parts. You are just too sensitive. uppps....I didn't really mean that!!!

 

[Paulie]

You got no ally here, Roger...I hope what you said was in jest. Jeez...you guys must think I'm this stiff, no sense of humor...person.

 

[Roger]

I wasn't looking for allies! I was serious about my posting and thought your opinion had merit. As far as being a stiff, no sense of humor person, I don't know you well enough to make that kind of judgement!

 

I apologize for the misunderstanding

[Tony T]

I'm really sorry too!!!

[The Truth]

Maybe you three should get togehter to settle this. As far as the original post goes, any guy who is 23 shouldn't be messing around with 16 year old girls. Period. (looking is one thing!)