Im dating a married woman!

[sunnysideplz]

Let me begin by saying I had no intentions of dating this married girl.. It just somehow happen, like when we first met which was through mutual friends a year ago, we bonded and connected really well, soon enough I founded out she was married and i respected that. As time goes on we would do small talks and make jokes about things from time to time, it was just mutual. About 4 months ago, she called me crying about her husband, and she needed a friend because honestly shes only been here in my town for about 5 years and Im one of good friends and bamm that was how it all began, took her out, had couple of drinks and things led to another. The romance was great and as time goes on we talk more and started seeing eachother more to a point where feelings starts to build.

 

Dont get me wrong Im only 26 and she is 27 and she is only married for a year n a few months, no kids, but she been with the guy for 5 years total. She tells me ever since they got married things change, things hasnt been the same, so on etc. And as for me, Ive been in the dating scene for a while, I tend to nick pick woman, and tend to have commitment problems, you can say Im emotionally dis function, but for some reason this married woman actually grew on me. We connect at all levels, our communication is great, we understand each other very well, its like mentally and physical we bond like no other. Like we talked about our complicated situation together, and we both agreed that it feels like we are in high school, that we both thought we would never feel this way about anyone ever again, but somehow we both came in each others life and sparked what was missing from our lives. And she also says she been faithful with her husband but ever since I came in, it destroyed everything.

 

And now I come to reality and realize as the time goes on, this can go bad or good, Im in the worst situation then she is because at the end of the day hes there and im not. Im like confused, lost dangling in dead air not knowing what to do.. I confronted her about the situation and she tells me that a divorce doesn't happen overnight, that she wants to see me more then her husband. But can this all be bull****?! Is she feeding me lies or being honest? Im confused.. Like for me, Im still young,but I traveled a lot, met a lot of ladies, and no one catches me like the way she does. Everything we do, we do like a team, we connect very well, its just crazy how we vibe. Even her close friend which is mines also knows the situation, and she thinks we are both crazyy! And that i should stop, but for me, im the type of person that if she is truely the one, i rather know, then stop now and wonder WHAT IF but at the same time I don't want to get burned. Like I know the married woman cares for me because she trys to mold me as a man, like she'll lecture me, for examples she will tell me to work harder and save my money, and things like be more responsible and start worrying about your future. Like she tries to make me better my life. And thats what attracts me more because I would change for her just to see her happy. Just throwing it in there, we both grew up rough and from broken families. Anyways

 

So Im completely lost.. Plz dont judge me because love has its own language. And as of this moment I feel like its 2 genuine people connecting, despite the complications in between. Has anyone ever been married but divorced the other person and is happily in love with the other spouse? Should i carry this on or just defuse it and drop it? Any advice will help. I think im going to hell... but honestly i feel like everything happens for a reason in life, everything teaches you something or will mold you to your future. So advice plz. Is this real or not real? What should I do

[worldover98]

If you're hanging with a married woman, then in the same town, that could turn very ugly. Imagine the other guy's feelings when he finds out. We don't know his temperament and breaking point. There could be a lot of hurt going around.

 

Perhaps you should give her an ultimatum that she must separate before you two can continue your thing. It's seem the only reasonable and safe thing to do.

 

Good Luck...man....

[StoneCold]

You get involved with a marred woman and it should be for sex and sex ONLY....even thats a risk and a half but to fall for her? you're nuts.

 

You add feelings to this and it will certainly go badly..

 

A) You will not win because when push comes to shove she almost always will choose the encumbant (her hubby); which leads to...

 

B) You'll hate the idea of not being able to have what you really want

 

C) The likelihood of her getting caught goes way up and if she does get caught you may have to deal with an irate man you know nothing about.

 

 

Also...DO NOT give an ultimatum of her leaving the hubby so that she can be with you because....if she does.

 

1) She may be leaving under the wrong premise...you'd be starting with her on a bad foot...its likely best emotionally and mentally if shes leaves for her on her time.

 

2) You're going to feel like you owe her and may feel pressured into moving things along at a pace you may not be comfortable with

 

 

I'd reccomend either you turn this into a sex only thing with rules(unlikely) or you bounce

[Desert Rose]

It's seems that you're in love, so it should be serious.

For now, there's no future in this relationship.

 

Think about it!

[fltc]

Possibly her husband will learn about you and will tear your testicles off. If you'd prefer that not happen, tell her to leave him before you see her again.

 

That's called self preservation.

[RepairMinded]

Question for the OP:

 

--What's it like tasting another man's semen on his wife's lips or other areas?

[Orianne]

If she wanted to be with you, nothing would stop her. Saying a divorce 'takes time' is nothing more than a ploy. She could separate from her husband right now and be free to date whomever she wanted while the divorce process went underway.

 

I think she's using you to fill an emotional gap in her relationship with her husband, and as long as you continue to fill that role, she'll never have a reason to leave him. Think of yourself as an 'emotional crutch'.

 

I know you care about this woman, but you're in a tough spot. She's obviously not ready to leave her husband, so giving her an ultimatum will likely backfire. And then, in the event that she did end up with you, you would have to deal with the fact that she cheated on her husband to be with you. Is that something you could move past--could you trust her? Every couple is different, but it's foolish to think that wouldn't be an issue.

 

I think you'd be much better off finding someone else. The dating scene gets old after a while, but there's someone for everyone, and the right one won't have a husband already.