reachingskywards Posted April 26, 2004 Share Posted April 26, 2004 Do you think that if the roles were reversed and you were the married one and the MM was single -- would he put up with the situation?? Mine wouldn't I'm sure. I said to my MM the other day that he had no right to complain if I started seeing other men -- and he was shocked and tried to tell me it wasn't the same as him being with his wife. Ha ha... Link to post Share on other sites
Beach Gurl Posted April 26, 2004 Share Posted April 26, 2004 Good Question! I suspect NO is the answer in most cases. I suggested the same thing as you did (Dating other men), and in fact followed through (did not see him during these times), but none of them led to anything. During those times, he was crazy with jealousy and part of the reason the relationships did not work. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted April 26, 2004 Share Posted April 26, 2004 in my case - yes, i think so. -yes Link to post Share on other sites
Chrissy21 Posted April 28, 2004 Share Posted April 28, 2004 Funny, I have asked myself that question many times and even intended on asking him that very same question. But, of course, the right time never seems to come for asking it. When we are together, I am just too happy to ruin the moment. But, to answer your question, NO, I don't think that he would put up with it. He would have too much pride to see me go home to my MM every night and believe that I wasn't sleeping or having sex with him. There is no way that he would put up with it. Which begs the question: why do I? Right? The the thing is i can only deal with so much for so long. Link to post Share on other sites
justcallmesnug Posted April 28, 2004 Share Posted April 28, 2004 I have brought this up to him before-what if I was the one sleeping in bed with some guy, a husband or otherwise. He said he would not handle it well. Also, and interesting, me seeing another guy is not the same as him being with his wife because there is no romantic or sexual interest there, and if I were with a guy, it would be different. Yikes! He says I am getting upset and crying over nothing because he can not stand her. Well, it's not nothing to me! You made kids with her and all you do is brag about them 24/7 Link to post Share on other sites
Author reachingskywards Posted May 1, 2004 Author Share Posted May 1, 2004 My MM also said that being with his wife would not be the same as me being with someone else -- because he doesn't love his wife or even sleep in the same bed. But I kinda think -- so what?? The point is that he is with her and that's his choice not mine. And how do I really know what he feels about her. Probably more than he's letting on considering that he's been with her for 24 years and still is. Link to post Share on other sites
Rightlymia Posted May 2, 2004 Share Posted May 2, 2004 There are quite a few pigs out there. They can do whatever they want but the women can't. If their wives cheated on them they would blow up and freak out on them. I say go out with whomever you want because I can promise he isn't staying away from his wife. They most likely still sleep together. I have too many male friends so I hear all about this stuff all the time. Link to post Share on other sites
Debster Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 If it is important for you to be the only woman in your man's life. Demand it. If he is not willing to lose the wife, lose him. Every woman deserves to be #1 in their man's life. If you were truly your married man's #1, he wouldn't still be married. Link to post Share on other sites
istilllovehim Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 My ex-husband will be released from jail in June. I guess were about to find out how the MM will react in my situation because I know my ex and he isnt going to give up on me so easily. Will let ya'll know. Link to post Share on other sites
JBoz0605 Posted May 7, 2004 Share Posted May 7, 2004 We are both married and not planning on leaving our spouses, so I don't think he would mind if he were single and I were married. But I could be wrong, if he were not married he might push me to leave my husband. Link to post Share on other sites
unluckylady Posted July 26, 2004 Share Posted July 26, 2004 If he can have sex with her, you can have sex with other men, though I totally understand your desire to be faithful to him...to be the "better" woman for him. Link to post Share on other sites
1Yoyo Posted August 16, 2004 Share Posted August 16, 2004 Originally posted by reachingskywards Do you think that if the roles were reversed and you were the married one and the MM was single -- would he put up with the situation?? Mine wouldn't I'm sure. I said to my MM the other day that he had no right to complain if I started seeing other men -- and he was shocked and tried to tell me it wasn't the same as him being with his wife. Ha ha... Based on the situation my MM and I are in now, Id have to say yes, my MM would wait. Ill have to ask him and Ill get back to you. I'm sure he will say yes, but the only way to REALLY know is to be in the situation. He has not ever asked me to wait for him, but I know he would like me to. Yo Link to post Share on other sites
smile95 Posted August 20, 2004 Share Posted August 20, 2004 I used to ask my MM that all the time and he said"We are married, but I feel nothing". Which meant I would be cheatihg if I saw someone else, but HE COULD BE MARRIED??? HMMMM? HE also said he would wait around for me if the tables were turned. No he would not.Wait 2 years?? I do not think so. They just say that-what are they going to say "You are righ, honey, I would not wait." Right Link to post Share on other sites
daisy123 Posted August 22, 2004 Share Posted August 22, 2004 my MM told me not to give up other opportunites to meet other people because of him, i told him i wouldnt. but ever since he said that to me he is sweeter than ever (if that is possible) and comes over almost every night and calls more. they dont want us to find someone else Link to post Share on other sites
Kizzyfur Posted August 23, 2004 Share Posted August 23, 2004 Originally posted by reachingskywards Do you think that if the roles were reversed and you were the married one and the MM was single -- would he put up with the situation?? Mine wouldn't I'm sure. I said to my MM the other day that he had no right to complain if I started seeing other men -- and he was shocked and tried to tell me it wasn't the same as him being with his wife. Ha ha... I have actually asked this of my MM. He said he'd stay with me for as long as it would take. I trust that he would too as long as I was making some sort of an effort to leave my husband. We've also discussed my seeing other guys. I've told him I won't wait forever for him. He says he understands and hopes he's divorced before I meet someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
painter Posted August 28, 2004 Share Posted August 28, 2004 i have to say...i could never be relaxed enough to be turned on or in love with someone who i thought may be lying to me. simple fact of the matter is, dont shag someone you cant trust. if they lie to their wives or dont tell her about you, you have no way of knowing how much they are hiding from you, no matter what they say. if the person they LIVE with cant see through them.....what are your chances. good people are capable of atrocities in the right circumstances. he may be a good guy but he is human, with all the power of deciet and lies that humans have. look after your heart. if you let it get broken too many times, the scars will stop it beating Link to post Share on other sites
Shiraz Posted November 1, 2004 Share Posted November 1, 2004 I have been with my MM for 3 years. He always told me, if I want to see other guys go ahead, how can he tell me not too if he has his wife. He says if he said I couldn't see anyone else, it would be double standards. I have gone out on about 3 dates, and I didn't tell him. I hated those dates. I feel any guy I date, has huge shoes to fill. My MM treats me very well. I wonder though. If I met some one, who I did click with. My MM said he would probably stay with me. But I don't think I would want that. If I met a nice guy. I would be faithful to him. PLUS..... It's easy for my MM to say he wouldn't mind, and it wouldn't hurt, and he'd stick by me. But when that situation actually arises (I'm being optomistic that I will meet some one). Then the true test will show. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts