Jmh4 Posted July 27, 2011 Share Posted July 27, 2011 Well, I have to first say that this site has been very inspirational for the past few months. I had to create an account and get some insight on my own issue. To start off with, my GF and I have been together since grade 11 (6 years). We moved in together and had been living together for 3 of those years. I then received an opportunity and had to move away. This shouldn't have been a problem since we have had 1.5 years as a long distant relationship before. When my best friend (for 2.5 years) heard about this he started speaking with her. Like a fool, I figured it was because they were friends. I tried to let my jealousy issues go and never brought it up. As soon as I moved though, my GF broke up with me without any warning or signs, it was very surprising. I was devastated and became very depressed. Then a few weeks after this I discovered she had been having sex with my best friend; the same guy who would call me up every day and hear me tell him how much I loved her and wanted to get back with her. Well I was crushed because of this! When I confronted him he lied telling me she cheated on me and that she forced him to do it. He kept telling me we were still great friends, blah, blah, blah. So I obviously told him never to talk to me again. So I gave it 4 months, but sincerely love this girl more than anything in the world, and I always have, so I contacted her. After confirming with her friends it turns out this so called friend of mine was lying. Although I still feel what she did was very unfair to me and hurt full. She had been going through a very similar experience because of the whole situation too. He was very manipulative and abusive. I know it’s a messed up situation but I just can’t be without her. So we got back together and I moved back with her. I've never really been with anyone else and I was her first as well so this is pretty upsetting for me. Although I should mention that I have no desire to be with anyone else. Well here we are a month in and I was hoping for advice. We speak about everything and she is very accommodating, no contact with the other guy (at all), lets me see all emails/calls/texts, and has been very supportive. I try to keep the information of what took place to prevent me from being hurt further. I’m not looking to give her up and truly want to do whatever it takes to stay with her. I know she feels the same way. When I am alone I keep getting these crazy jealous thoughts though and I feel they consume me. What are some ways, methods or practices I can do to help me get through this? I know only time will heal but any information would be much appreciated. Thank you! (sorry it was so long :S) Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted July 27, 2011 Share Posted July 27, 2011 Let me get this straight. Your girlfriend breaks up with you without warning and proceeds to have sex with your former best friend. 4 months later you contact her and get back together again. Why would you do this? 1. She breaks up with you without telling you why. 2. She then continues to sleep with your then best friend. She seems very immature and easily manipulated. I think you are making a huge mistake. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Darren Steez Posted July 27, 2011 Share Posted July 27, 2011 It will never get better! Everytime you're alone you'll be wondering what she's up to, when she goes out and she stays out late you'll be wondering why. The reason? She betrayed your trust and no amount of "love" can ever heal that. You want to be with her so bad then learn to curb your jealousy but it seems you're a jealous person by nature so that maybe tricky and confining her movements will only drive her away. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted July 28, 2011 Share Posted July 28, 2011 Well, I have to first say that this site has been very inspirational for the past few months. I had to create an account and get some insight on my own issue. To start off with, my GF and I have been together since grade 11 (6 years). We moved in together and had been living together for 3 of those years. I then received an opportunity and had to move away. This shouldn't have been a problem since we have had 1.5 years as a long distant relationship before. When my best friend (for 2.5 years) heard about this he started speaking with her. Like a fool, I figured it was because they were friends. I tried to let my jealousy issues go and never brought it up. As soon as I moved though, my GF broke up with me without any warning or signs, it was very surprising. I was devastated and became very depressed. Then a few weeks after this I discovered she had been having sex with my best friend; the same guy who would call me up every day and hear me tell him how much I loved her and wanted to get back with her. Well I was crushed because of this! When I confronted him he lied telling me she cheated on me and that she forced him to do it. He kept telling me we were still great friends, blah, blah, blah. So I obviously told him never to talk to me again. So I gave it 4 months, but sincerely love this girl more than anything in the world, and I always have, so I contacted her. After confirming with her friends it turns out this so called friend of mine was lying. Although I still feel what she did was very unfair to me and hurt full. She had been going through a very similar experience because of the whole situation too. He was very manipulative and abusive. I know it’s a messed up situation but I just can’t be without her. So we got back together and I moved back with her. I've never really been with anyone else and I was her first as well so this is pretty upsetting for me. Although I should mention that I have no desire to be with anyone else. Well here we are a month in and I was hoping for advice. We speak about everything and she is very accommodating, no contact with the other guy (at all), lets me see all emails/calls/texts, and has been very supportive. I try to keep the information of what took place to prevent me from being hurt further. I’m not looking to give her up and truly want to do whatever it takes to stay with her. I know she feels the same way. When I am alone I keep getting these crazy jealous thoughts though and I feel they consume me. What are some ways, methods or practices I can do to help me get through this? I know only time will heal but any information would be much appreciated. Thank you! (sorry it was so long :S) Your relationship is over. Stop thinking it gets any better. She does not respect you, she see you as a weakling. You want to believe otherwise but believe us, you would be much better off dating someone local. The well is poisoned and it WILL happen again if you stay with her.... Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted July 28, 2011 Share Posted July 28, 2011 If she felt the same way you do she would not have gotten the straight and skinny from your friend.... Link to post Share on other sites
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