Fiance cheated and I punched but is he right to get mad

[summerdowling87]

Maybe she just high fived his face by accident

[robdrm32]

I find this thread amusing. In the moral sense no the OP wasn't right in punching her fiance, but I don't blame her for a second and wouldn't say to her "you shouldn't have done that"

 

I think some are failing to realize that humans are animals, with complex emotions and react to situations in non-constructive ways but that doesn't mean they were wrong or out of line to do so.

 

Here is 2 stories for you.

 

One of my friends had sex with my g/f a few years back, and rather than beating him up like i should have I chose the high road. And what did that do? nothing. made it worse, all those horrible feelings of anger and hatred just got bottled up and resulted in depression. If i had knocked that effer out I would have gotten all of it out and frankly been much better off today emotionally.

 

Another story, my sister cheated on her fiance while he was asleep in the other room. he caught her in the act and went after the guy, and then her. He didn't beat her up he hit her in the arms and such nothing major. Not once did i ever feel like "that bastard put his hands on my sister!" the dumb b*tch was asking for it. and yes i love my sister i do ALOT for her but that was just messed up I harbor no ill will towards my now bro in-law for hitting her. He was emotional, he LOVES her those emotions can drive you to do crazy things.

 

So i say good for you OP, he got what he had coming.

 

And i wonder, how many that say she was so childish/wrong would say that a child rapist that goes to prison and is brutalized "get's whats coming to him" when he gets to prison. Or are you employing the 2 wrongs don't make a right theory.

 

No, 2 wrongs don't make a right but actions have consequences.

[samsungxoxo]

I harbor no ill will towards my now bro in-law for hitting her. He was emotional, he LOVES her those emotions can drive you to do crazy things.

So you mean he still marry her?

[Woggle]

If he left her and dated another woman while not caring one bit about her it would be better revenge. I know her type and it drives them crazy when a man moves on. Now she knows she can get a reaction out of him and can use it as a weapon.

[robdrm32]

So you mean he still marry her?

 

yeah, he is a good man

[samsungxoxo]

yeah, he is a good man

I think she'll cheat again (or maybe she still is but knows how to hide it better) and if that's the case.... then all well shame on him this time.

 

This just seems more like a ''sorry I got caught cheating'' story.

 

I myself would find it disgusting staying with a man who not only cheated but I saw in bed screwing another woman. I don't think I would ever get over the visuals.

[nofool4u]

Isn't a woman who hits a man (knowing he's not likely to strike back) equally a coward? Your logic is warped IMO. She is a bastard, a coward because she hit a man knowing that he wouldn't respond back.

 

absolutely correct

[nofool4u]

Having an impulsive moment of anger because you found out the love of your life has been screwing your best friend is not someone who is a coward, and it's unrealistic for you to even claim that.

 

then you just gave a justification for a man letting his impulses get the best of him, if you believe that its acceptable for a woman.

[robdrm32]

then you just gave a justification for a man letting his impulses get the best of him, if you believe that its acceptable for a woman.

 

well one of my ex's told me how her ex used to hit her. after a few months of her lying and cheating on me i began to understand what happened.

 

Now i never hit her and never would, but thats because i have alot of self control. But i don't blame a guy that feels the need to slap a b*tch that says she loves him then goes off and bangs someone else. theres always 3 sides to a story.

 

There is a difference between punching/beating and a simple slap out of a moment of anger caused by someones selfish and disrespectful behavior.

[samsungxoxo]

There is a difference between punching/beating and a simple slap out of a moment of anger caused by someones selfish and disrespectful behavior.

But the OP didn't slapped him... she punched him.

[Woggle]

I understand that getting cheated on hurts but just leave their asses. I actually think most cheaters would enjoy the fact that they pushes somebody to that point. It feeds their ego.

[robdrm32]

But the OP didn't slapped him... she punched him.

 

true i meant to do punch/slap as opposed to beating.

 

Still, a punch in the face hurts for hours or a day at most. The pain of being cheated on can hurt for months, if not years depending on the situation.

 

Woggle, i agree with your sentiment but we live in the real world where emotions take control of people and rationality often gets tossed out the window. This thread is a good example.

 

the op's fiance should be pissed at himself, he brought that fist to his face by his own actions.

[LZ2000]

Last week I found out my fiance cheated on me with my friend Aracelly. I discovered this through a message written on his email and confronted him about it. As you can imagine, he went on expressing remorse and saying sorry.

 

It was then I punched him hard in the mouth, drawing a bit of blood. He went on saying ''What the ****, stupid *****, that is assault and you had no rights to hit me. What if you were the cheater and I hit you for that, you would have had me arrested right so why can I do the same. Forget it I don't feel bad about it anymore'' and he left.

 

Since then it's been NC but was he right in his reasoning? I think I overracted but getting cheated on hurts and even worst when they do with your friend.

 

Honestly, if I cheated on my girlfriend, I would toss away my pride, go on my knees, and beg for forgiveness. I'd even take her punches.

 

Because what is more important is that I make up for my mistakes and not destroy everything we've built up for. Emotional investments in a relationship are often the largest losses when things go severely wrong.

Edited September 16, 2011 by LZ2000

[nofool4u]

well one of my ex's told me how her ex used to hit her. after a few months of her lying and cheating on me i began to understand what happened.

 

Now i never hit her and never would, but thats because i have alot of self control. But i don't blame a guy that feels the need to slap a b*tch that says she loves him then goes off and bangs someone else. theres always 3 sides to a story.

 

There is a difference between punching/beating and a simple slap out of a moment of anger caused by someones selfish and disrespectful behavior.

 

so if you think its acceptable for a woman to "slap" a man, then wouldn't it be also acceptable in reverse? Seeing as how you and the ones that support the double standard are tying this to strength, and a slap isn't a punch.

[nofool4u]

the op's fiance should be pissed at himself, he brought that fist to his face by his own actions.

 

and if she was the one that cheated instead?

[country_gurl]

Assault is assault and it's a criminal act and the "reason" one assaults someone (unless it was self-defense) is irrelevant. Regardless of gender, NOBODY should be physically assaulting anyone. Regardless of the fact that the OP's fiance cheated on her, he would be well within the law to press charges of assault. It doesn't matter one iota if this is the first time she's ever hit anyone, once is more than enough. It's scary that there are people here who condone this kind of criminal behavior because that's what it is, it's a crime to assault someone - period.