Curvy bodies vs. Slender/Lean Bodies

[D-Lish]

Lol, I was telling a buddy of mine the other day that despite the fact that our women want to feel like they are special and the only ones for us, the truth is they are simply the first ones to come along, meet our criteria, and want to date us. There is likely a decent number of other women who fit the bill. He agreed and we both agreed that any woman listening to our conversation would be horrified.

 

No- not really horrified at all, I totallly get it- the smart ones do get it.

 

There are a lot of beautiful women out there- you have choice, and so do the chicks. It's playing the odds right?

 

If this construction dude encountered 20 girls in the alley on a Thursday, while they take a short cut into work- one of them will respond... That's called playing the odds- that's a totally acceptable way to date. He's going to attract someone out of those 20 women- and probably get laid way more often than the guy that never has the courage to say anything at all.. That's just his Thursday... lol.

[Sanman]

No- not really horrified at all, I totallly get it- the smart ones do get it.

 

There are a lot of beautiful women out there- you have choice, and so do the chicks. It's playing the odds right?

 

If this construction dude encountered 20 girls in the alley on a Thursday, while they take a short cut into work- one of them will respond... That's called playing the odds- that's a totally acceptable way to date. He's going to attract someone out of those 20 women- and probably get laid way more often than the guy that never has the courage to say anything at all.. That's just his Thursday... lol.

 

 

Pretty much, lol! Many (most ?) guys are just looking for the basics. A woman they find attractive to have sex with and maybe spend their time with. The details may be a bit different for all of us, but those are the broad strokes.

[Anela]

Lol, I was telling a buddy of mine the other day that despite the fact that our women want to feel like they are special and the only ones for us, the truth is they are simply the first ones to come along, meet our criteria, and want to date us. There is likely a decent number of other women who fit the bill. He agreed and we both agreed that any woman listening to our conversation would be horrified.

 

I know a man who still isn't over his ex of eight years. It does bother me, I'll admit that. I know someone else who's married to the woman of his dreams, and another, actually - an American man who met his Australian wife over the internet (not the couple from here). they all seem smitten.

 

It seems to me that there's more room for insecurities to bloom when it comes to what you describe, precisely because they're not considered to be special, but maybe that's just because of the head space I'm in tonight. I don't like the idea of being settled for, but I'm not a stunner, either. D-lish's comment made me laugh, though - I had messages from college students, and men in their forties and fifties, and I wondered how many women they were messaging (most were the "sexy lady" comments, but a few actually spoke to me nicely).

[threebyfate]

I know a man who still isn't over his ex of eight years. It does bother me, I'll admit that. I know someone else who's married to the woman of his dreams, and another, actually - an American man who met his Australian wife over the internet (not the couple from here). they all seem smitten.

 

It seems to me that there's more room for insecurities to bloom when it comes to what you describe, precisely because they're not considered to be special, but maybe that's just because of the head space I'm in tonight. I don't like the idea of being settled for, but I'm not a stunner, either. D-lish's comment made me laugh, though - I had messages from college students, and men in their forties and fifties, and I wondered how many women they were messaging (most were the "sexy lady" comments, but a few actually spoke to me nicely).

I wouldn't take these kinds of comments too seriously on LS. While I don't believe in soulmates or "the one", when people really are in love, the other person is plenty, plenty special. And if the other person isn't special to these guys, they're not in love, just passing time with someone who's somewhat good enough.

[Anela]

Lol, I was telling a buddy of mine the other day that despite the fact that our women want to feel like they are special and the only ones for us, the truth is they are simply the first ones to come along, meet our criteria, and want to date us. There is likely a decent number of other women who fit the bill. He agreed and we both agreed that any woman listening to our conversation would be horrified.

 

The guy who misses his ex, eight years later, said the year before he lost her, that no doubt were there other women who might be compatible with him, but he wanted his girlfriend. I wonder if he thought she would be easy to replace when they broke up. (although his jealousy was the reason they broke up - she was a stunner, who would be approached by men when he would leave her side to just go to the bathroom).

 

She's moved on; he still regrets screwing that up.

[D-Lish]

Pretty much, lol! Many (most ?) guys are just looking for the basics. A woman they find attractive to have sex with and maybe spend their time with. The details may be a bit different for all of us, but those are the broad strokes.

 

And that's okay- and nothing to apologize for my friend, I'm telling you, hang out in an alley in a hard hat...

[threebyfate]

And that's okay- and nothing to apologize for my friend, I'm telling you, hang out in an alley in a hard hat...

D, right now you're probably a touch cynical. But there really are men who are capable and willing to love, particularly someone special like yourself. That's not to say there aren't plenty of men like Sanman and his friend. But most definitely, they don't represent the entire male gender.

 

As far as curvy v. slender, there are preferences for both or either but most often, either.

[D-Lish]

D, right now you're probably a touch cynical. But there really are men who are capable and willing to love, particularly someone special like yourself. That's not to say there aren't plenty of men like Sanman and his friend. But most definitely, they don't represent the entire male gender.

 

As far as curvy v. slender, there are preferences for both or either but most often, either.

 

Well you know I am jaded. My Posts will sometimes reflect that,

but I have said all along- there are preferences for "all"

[Chocolat]

When did curvy stop referring to hot in shape women with a true hour glass figure? Little in the middle is what I’m saying. You are not little in the middle just because you are less fat in the gut then in the fat top and bottom. Most women who compare themselves to Beyonce or what ever are just plain fat and shapeless yet think they are “curvy” and then go around insulting healthy young women as being rail thin and having no shape when they in fact have shape and rounder buts and boobs and the hour glass shape.

 

I think that, as the US (and world, I guess) becomes heavier, there is aneed to find nicer words to describe women who are overweight. And curvy is one of them. So the women who are truly curvy (your definition) and those who are just overweight are both identified with the same label.

 

 

I don't think a lot of men are overly discerning- as long as you're average or above- you're going to get attention.

 

This!

 

Men seem to see women like wine -- there's lots of bottles they can enjoy.

 

I have seen several threads on LS in which a woman is upset over the fact that her ex is now dating someone she deems less attractive than herself, but I've never seen this coming from a man. I think women don't understand how flexible men can be in what they find attractive.

[Eternal Sunshine]

I do think the most men have preferences for one or the other. It's only really low quality guys that will go for almost anything that moves (no offense to anyone).

 

Me and my best friend (dark haired girl in my avatar) are pretty good example of this. She is tall and thin, but pretty straight up and down. I am curvy but definitely would look much better if I dropped around 20lbs. When we go out we get around 50/50 split of guys that approach one or the other. She seems completely invisible to the guys that are interested in me and vice versa. In fact, in the 7 years that we have been friends -there was never a guy that showed interest in both of us.

[Engadget]

I am a fan of curvy up into fat, I personally think a woman looks more feminine with a bigger body and it's my preference.

 

I don't dislike skinny girls, I just prefer bigger if it comes down to it.

[zengirl]

I do think the most men have preferences for one or the other. It's only really low quality guys that will go for almost anything that moves (no offense to anyone).

 

Me and my best friend (dark haired girl in my avatar) are pretty good example of this. She is tall and thin, but pretty straight up and down. I am curvy but definitely would look much better if I dropped around 20lbs. When we go out we get around 50/50 split of guys that approach one or the other. She seems completely invisible to the guys that are interested in me and vice versa. In fact, in the 7 years that we have been friends -there was never a guy that showed interest in both of us.

 

You and your friend look different in loads of other ways, and I assume you don't act EXACTLY the same either (smiles, eye contact, etc, have a LOT to do with being approached and so on) so that's not quite a scientific thing there.

 

Your low quality man theory seems off to me. Really, I have dated men with slight preferences (though I think some degree of curves are a universal male preference, as is some degree of thinness---the best is likely a balance of both, and where a man finds that balance is the individual part), but I've never dated men whose ex-girlfriends all looked like me, body-wise or otherwise, and that would indicate a low quality man to me, because it would make me think they choose looks over other (potentially more important) factors to a very specific degree. (Doesn't mean they had to date ugly girls or anything, but if they all look the same, it'd weird me out.)

[Chocolat]

I do think the most men have preferences for one or the other. It's only really low quality guys that will go for almost anything that moves (no offense to anyone).

 

Me and my best friend (dark haired girl in my avatar) are pretty good example of this. She is tall and thin, but pretty straight up and down. I am curvy but definitely would look much better if I dropped around 20lbs. When we go out we get around 50/50 split of guys that approach one or the other. She seems completely invisible to the guys that are interested in me and vice versa. In fact, in the 7 years that we have been friends -there was never a guy that showed interest in both of us.

 

Oh, I think men have preferences, if all things are equal. And I do think there are legs/ass guys versus breast guys (in particular, there seems to be a subset of men who have very definite opinions abut breast size). But, all that said, I don't think it's as fixed as it is made out to be. Sure, if there are two girls at a bar and two guys are going to approach, they will likely discuss beforehand who is going to approach whom. But does that mean if you were out with a friend who looked very similar to you that the same two guys would not approach you? I doubt it.

 

I've never dated men whose ex-girlfriends all looked like me, body-wise or otherwise, and that would indicate a low quality man to me, because it would make me think they choose looks over other (potentially more important) factors to a very specific degree.

 

My experience is similar. In fact, I have sometimes been surprised at how dissimilar some of my bf's ex-gf's were.

 

Honestly, especially with high-quality, mature, men (and they're the only ones who count, right? ), looks are just one part of the equation. Of course there has to be attraction, but personality and character are also part of attraction as are mannerisms and other less quantifiable charactertistics. We're all familar with people who are not classicially beautiful (or handsome) but somehow have an undefined magnetism that draws others to them.

[Engadget]

Thank you, Engadget.

 

It's tough, and I tell women that they look great bigger all the time. Sadly society has indoctrinated most to hate themselves if they're "fat".

 

Big women get me going like no skinny woman can, but I guess my position isn't all that common!

[Hot Chick]

A lot of blonde women will get attention just because of the blonde hair, even if they have an unattractive face. so it's not a compliment to go out with a dark haired friend who is thinner than you and get attention, the guys hitting on the blond are just into the hair and face and body don't matter.

[Casablanca]

I dont mind them skinny or with a little meat on the bones and everything in between, face is important, and becomes more important with more meat on the bones. The weight needs to be distributed well though; it its all in the gut and love handles, probably not.

 

I have a friend she's a few extra pounds, but very cute face and very fun...if her and her boyfriend ever break up I'm gonna ask her out if Im single...Ive had such a crush on her since first meeting her.

[somedude81]

A lot of blonde women will get attention just because of the blonde hair, even if they have an unattractive face. so it's not a compliment to go out with a dark haired friend who is thinner than you and get attention, the guys hitting on the blond are just into the hair and face and body don't matter.

That's not true at all.

 

Even though I prefer blondes I will always go for the prettier girl. Also ES said that her friend is "She is tall and thin, but pretty straight up and down."Which I understand as, no boobs.

 

For me, the order of preference is; body, face, hair. And for hair, style and length is more important than color. I'd pick a long haired brunette over a short haired blond any day.

[stillafool]

I've been a victim more than once. Other women will tell me I'm skinny or boney & can't seem to grasp that my weight is proportional to my height (5'9" @ 140lbs) & yes, they're usually short & round. But I still have small boobs & a small a$$. Slim people have feelings too.

 

I hear you, but yet if you called them fat and out of shape you would be considered a bitoch. Why do heavier women think it is okay to insult thinner women?

[xoxoDaniellexoxo]

I want an honest answer on this , and i'm not saying this to start and argument. I am 5'3" naturally have a big chest 34DD tiny waist(go figure) and hips that I think are proportional. I am 117lbs wear a size 4/5 jean and have a pretty flat stomach, definitly not a six pack! Would you guys consider me curvy or skinny or am I in between?? I won't take offense!

[jasperste]

I want an honest answer on this , and i'm not saying this to start and argument. I am 5'3" naturally have a big chest 34DD tiny waist(go figure) and hips that I think are proportional. I am 117lbs wear a size 4/5 jean and have a pretty flat stomach, definitly not a six pack! Would you guys consider me curvy or skinny or am I in between?? I won't take offense!

You are curvy as you have reasonably large breasts and a propertionally small waist. There is a curve to your body so you are curvy. Whether you tand facing someone or sideways there is some curve. I think if you had a large stomach (which you don't ) this would decrease the curve / difference between waist and hips/chest and you would be overweight.

[somedude81]

I want an honest answer on this , and i'm not saying this to start and argument. I am 5'3" naturally have a big chest 34DD tiny waist(go figure) and hips that I think are proportional. I am 117lbs wear a size 4/5 jean and have a pretty flat stomach, definitly not a six pack! Would you guys consider me curvy or skinny or am I in between?? I won't take offense!

Because of the chest, I'd say you fall under curvy. It also depends on your hips and butt.

 

Pictures would really help.

[jasperste]

I think even if the difference between waist and hips/but is small she is still curvy becasue of the chest. However not 'hourglass' if but and hips are small and narrow

[carhill]

From a site which appears to address the same subject as the topic of this thread, here's an example of well-preserved curvy, Sophia Loren at age 74. In her prime, her measurements were purportedly 38C-24-38 and she was a relatively tall 5' 8". It was interesting see her next to Jayne Mansfield and how 'slender' Sophia looked in comparison. Jayne, with a 40" bust and 21" waist, seemed a bit exaggerated, even for 'curvy'

[irc333]

this about sums it up

http://www.body2shape.com/image-files/0bodyshapequestionnaire.jpg

 

 

Yeah, I don't know how women got stuck with the curse of the "Apple" shape.

[misssmartypants]

1) The part of the breast that gets admired is mostly fat. Genetics determine how that fat arranges its self. Or the plastic surgeon.

 

2) Weight loss causes the breast and the butt to shrink.

 

how do I know? I recent lost about 20 pounds and my bras don't fit right anymore and my butt lost some roundness.

 

As to shape preference, the media and the fashion industry push the thin look. The truth is that women and men come in all sorts of shapes. Just because a certain body type is considered to be more desirable or healthy, doesn't mean that a person's genes support that shape.

 

I'm not saying anyone is wrong for having an ideal, but it seems like several users here can't accept any female in their lives who doesn't meet that ideal. This attitude that women are supposed to look, act, dress, and keep their hair a certain way is honestly shallow and ridiculous.