Californiadoll Posted April 28, 2004 Share Posted April 28, 2004 Okay, i'm in a bit of a bind right now. Some of you have read my posts about the devestating break up I had with my boyfriend. Well, since we've broken up 2 weeks ago. We've chatting a bit over the phone, most recently lastnight for about 20 minutes, and i'm anxious to talk to him more but I won't call him for a few more days. anyways, My twentieth birthday is coming up next thursday and before we broke up, we talked about what we would do for each other on our birthdays. I threw him a party on his and he said he'd make sure my 20th would be a day I would never forget. Well, obviously things changed but I still desperately want him to be with me when I go to Sea World (my mom is taking me). We broke up on April 12th and my birthday is on May 6th and we've only hung out once since we broke up. Do you think it's too soon so invite him? It would be the best birthday present I could ever recieve. I know he misses me, there is no doubt in my mind. I could hear it in his voice when I talked to him lastnight but he's really afraid to dive into anything like that right now. I think that if he comes, we'll have such a great time and he'll see how much more positive I am and more confident I am in myself. I'm not sure if anyone would believe me when I say that 2 and a half weeks away from your ex gives you a lot of time to think about where you screwed up, recognize and it change it. I feel very satisfied with myself but I know it's him that's missing in my life. I think spending the day with each other and a few of his and my friends will bring us a little closer. I'm not necessarily asking for him to ask me back that night (although that would be my dream come true), all I want is for him to see that i'm better than I used to be and that there is still so much chemistry we still have together. When I talked to him lastnight, I assured him that first and foremost, I want him to be my friend. One of my friends is a DJ for a local radio station and i've asked him to play "The Reason" by Hoobastank and "Until the Day I Die" by Story of the year (one of his favorite songs) about the same time that we'll be driving home from Sea World. I told my friend to make sure he said that I dedicated those songs to him. This would be sentimental to my ex because he's a musician himself and he obviously has a passion for music. If we're driving home and he hears that over the radio, I wonder what his reaction might be. But anyways, none of that will happen unless he decides to go that day. I'm not quite sure how to ask him. I was thinking about driving to his house, which is about a 45 minute drive for me, and saying something like "I just wanted to show you by driving out here how much it would mean for you and your sister (my friend also) to join me on my special day." I'd get an answer and then leave. Does anyone else have a better idea? I want it to be cute and sentimental and something that will manipulate him into going (muhahaha, *maniacle laugh*). Just kidding...no, but I really do want him to go. I just don't know how to go about asking and time is running out! It's a week from Thursday and I don't want him to make any plans but I don't want to suffocate him because I just called him lastnight! Help! Link to post Share on other sites
tiki Posted April 28, 2004 Share Posted April 28, 2004 idunno...I kinda feel like it's his obligation to make sure that you are taken care of for your b-day *if he still cares about you*. It's not your obligation to bend over backwards for him to be there. Kinda get what I'm saying? If I loved someone (not familiar with the stats here, how long you guys were together and all that)...then I'd make damn sure that I didn't miss my love's birthday. That'd be MY job...not HIS. So let him do the work. If he's interested, he needs to come around. I'd say shoot him an email at most. Don't act desperate to see him. If he digs you, he'll shine thru. Tell him you are tryin to get a head count. Tell him you are thinking of inviting other friends. If he declines, then take it as a major hint. If he can't court you for/on your birthday...the boy AIN'T worth keepin. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Californiadoll Posted April 28, 2004 Author Share Posted April 28, 2004 new news! my mom called him yesterday, I had no clue she would, and invited him. She told me he said yes and he sounded really enthusiastic about going. Now i'm just nervous about it...I'm really exicted though. Obviously he wants to hang which hasn't been to apparent the past few weeks. What should I do on that day??? Link to post Share on other sites
Becks84 Posted April 28, 2004 Share Posted April 28, 2004 Well just be yourself -- the "new and improved you" as you say . Don't sweat him...pay attention to everyone else there and have a good time! Enjoy your birthday, not just for the fact that he is there, but also because you are with your family and friends. Look at the big picture, and although it's hard for us humans to do, try and be thankful for the wonderful life you do in fact have, and try and appreciate the fact that you are celebrating your 20th birthday in such a way, and even at all. I know your world seems miserable without your bf in it the way he was, but believe me life has a funny way of working itself out! ANd in time, it will. There's only so much you can do. Now it's time to sit back and let a higher power with the control take care. We are never given anything we can't handle! But it's often not apparent until later when we look back. Keep working on yourself and making yourself happy in the days to come. You have a lot to do yet whether you realize it or not. You'll do great! And like I said, things WILL work themselves out the way they should! Good luck and have a happy birthday!! -becks Link to post Share on other sites
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