Wesker Posted August 5, 2011 Share Posted August 5, 2011 A couple previous threads for my backstory. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t284031/ http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t286359/ So I find out today that my ex has been with someone else for the past month(at least), just after dumping me the beginning of June. We work at the same place so word gets around. Also find out that they are perhaps getting married pretty soon. WTF would be a understatement. The end of this month would have been 8 years we would have been together. Must say that there is a huge pit not only in my heart, but my stomach right now. Thing is, I know who the guy she's with. Talk about a major downgrade from me. Not only is he way older than her (she's 35, he's 43), he's very chunky, and not a great looking guy. He also works at the same place, but is in the office management dept. So what if he can afford a house, and makes more $$$ than me. I just can't believe how someone I thought loved me to death can just erase almost 8 years in almost 2 months time. At least now I can finally have the final nail of closure, and really start to move on. I'm going to do total NC, even if I do happen to see her at work. After all, she is dead to me now. The woman I loved the most is not the person there today. So there won't be any awkwardness. Link to post Share on other sites
smudge21 Posted August 5, 2011 Share Posted August 5, 2011 I think the line "I don't miss her, I miss the person I thought she was" rings true here. I know what you mean about people changing, I'm going through that right now. It's just so hard to accept that these people we were willing to give so much to can now change so much. Like you say, your ex has gone for someone below you (maybe just for the money). Her loss, your gain when you meet someone better. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wesker Posted August 6, 2011 Author Share Posted August 6, 2011 I'm also in a dilemma too. A long while back, I had given her an old baby picture of me sleeping. I never got it back when she dumped me. Since I don't exactly have that many old pictures of me, I would really like it back. Would an email be suffice? Also, I have tons of clothes, and gifts she had given me while we were together, all packed up and ready for Goodwill. Except I can't really let them go. Part of me says just to throw them in the back of my closet, and forget em. The other part says to just let go and close this chapter of my life. Some of the the shirts are still pretty nice. Link to post Share on other sites
smudge21 Posted August 6, 2011 Share Posted August 6, 2011 Those things are connections to her, dragging up memories which will make you feel happy one minute and sad the next. I had pictures of my ex that took me ages to delete or get rid of. It was the hardest thing ever but they were always there to look at. Decide how these things make you feel, not just straight away but after you've looked at them. As for the picture she has I would send an email or text, but keep it business like, no sweetness or flirting, just nice and friendly. Don't get drawn into a conversation or a meeting. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wesker Posted August 6, 2011 Author Share Posted August 6, 2011 Yeah, I decided to just hide all the things away in my closet for now. I wiped all the pics on my computer clean. I do actually have some 3x5 film pics that I stashed in the closet as well. Maybe some day I'll be able to bring them back out; or hell, in some bizzaro world happening, we would actually get back together, I'd still have them. Just wish the 8 years of memories in my head/heart could just be hidden away like that. Link to post Share on other sites
Bito Posted August 6, 2011 Share Posted August 6, 2011 Maybe some day I'll be able to bring them back out; or hell, in some bizzaro world happening, we would actually get back together Dangerous to think like that. She left you and started daiting someone she had known shorely after your breakup which probly means something was happening with them while you were still in the relationship. Obviously it is just speculation but either way you should not get back with her... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wesker Posted August 7, 2011 Author Share Posted August 7, 2011 Dangerous to think like that. She left you and started daiting someone she had known shorely after your breakup which probly means something was happening with them while you were still in the relationship. Obviously it is just speculation but either way you should not get back with her... Considering that they are apparently getting married soon(reliable sources), I would say speculation of them fooling around while she was with me is more truth. It just sucks trying to get over almost 8 years of being together, and trying to move on. On a plus side, people who work directly with her have a different opinion of her now, and tell me I'm a hot catch out there. Too bad these people are old and married though.. Link to post Share on other sites
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