I don't know if I should be angry at myself or her or even angry at all

[photogeek]

Let me begin with some back story. I met this girl through a mutual friend who said she was interested. Got her number from him and we texted each other non stop. Went out with her, great time, nothing really transpired between us, but we continued talking. I was going on a holiday for 10 days, so I wanted to make plans with her before I left, but she was "busy" so I said alright, when I get back. We still talked while I was on holiday, occasionally about what was going on in my vacation etc.. She even joked around about getting her something (which I had already). But then it just all stopped. She didn't reply to my message, and so I left it be for that day. The next day I sent her another message and of course, no reply. I thought this was odd, but I had a feeling. Fast forward two days, and still nothing from her, I happen to log one day onto my facebook and at the very top she has changed her relationship status to in a relationship with the mutual friend who initially introduced us. I can't say I am shocked, they had been best friends for some time, and I always knew there was something between them by the way they acted. But I don't know if I should be mad at her? Not for being in a relationship with the guy, but that she couldn't see it fit to even end it properly with me? At least a text message, or even a facebook message. But then I jump to me and I feel angry at myself for not making the move earlier on her. But then I think well it wouldn't have mattered because obviously this has been brewing between them for some time. What do you think? Should I even message her just to clear up things, leave it be?

[smudge21]

I'd leave it and just try to see her as a friend now. Nothing really happened between you. Yeah okay, it would've been nice for her to tell you, but maybe she didn't know how to and so did the silent treatment thing, thinking that would be easier. But you've got to remember that you weren't dating her officially.

 

Try to take your mind off this as I can see it quickly becoming a problem for you now. I mean, she's now something you can't have, yet your heart will be telling you she should be yours, it was going great so why didn't it carry on, it's not fair... etc etc. She could quite easily become an obsession without you even knowing it. Feelings for someone don't build up when we're with them, but when we're apart.

 

Step back and tell yourself that it's fine. She's a nice girl, you got along but she was interested in someone else. Look elsewhere.

[KathyM]

Let me begin with some back story. I met this girl through a mutual friend who said she was interested. Got her number from him and we texted each other non stop. Went out with her, great time, nothing really transpired between us, but we continued talking. I was going on a holiday for 10 days, so I wanted to make plans with her before I left, but she was "busy" so I said alright, when I get back. We still talked while I was on holiday, occasionally about what was going on in my vacation etc.. She even joked around about getting her something (which I had already). But then it just all stopped. She didn't reply to my message, and so I left it be for that day. The next day I sent her another message and of course, no reply. I thought this was odd, but I had a feeling. Fast forward two days, and still nothing from her, I happen to log one day onto my facebook and at the very top she has changed her relationship status to in a relationship with the mutual friend who initially introduced us. I can't say I am shocked, they had been best friends for some time, and I always knew there was something between them by the way they acted. But I don't know if I should be mad at her? Not for being in a relationship with the guy, but that she couldn't see it fit to even end it properly with me? At least a text message, or even a facebook message. But then I jump to me and I feel angry at myself for not making the move earlier on her. But then I think well it wouldn't have mattered because obviously this has been brewing between them for some time. What do you think? Should I even message her just to clear up things, leave it be?

Leave it be. She's made her choice. No reason to contact her at this point.

[photogeek]

I'd leave it and just try to see her as a friend now. Nothing really happened between you. Yeah okay, it would've been nice for her to tell you, but maybe she didn't know how to and so did the silent treatment thing, thinking that would be easier. But you've got to remember that you weren't dating her officially.

 

Try to take your mind off this as I can see it quickly becoming a problem for you now. I mean, she's now something you can't have, yet your heart will be telling you she should be yours, it was going great so why didn't it carry on, it's not fair... etc etc. She could quite easily become an obsession without you even knowing it. Feelings for someone don't build up when we're with them, but when we're apart.

 

Step back and tell yourself that it's fine. She's a nice girl, you got along but she was interested in someone else. Look elsewhere.

 

Yeah I have moved on per say, it was just difficult to swallow the fact she could just ignore someone like that. True, it wasn't official, and maybe that is why I took my time with it, I didn't want to fully invest myself emotionally into someone that wasn't a for sure thing. haha don't worry, it wont become an obsession. Honestly, time will help, and eventually it will be a thing of the past. Just wanted some outside input in the situation.