Direpoet Posted April 30, 2004 Share Posted April 30, 2004 Hey all, Just needin some advice on whether to flirt or not to flirt. Ok. There is this lady in my work who is about the same age as I am. There are obvious signs of interest, but she's saying something different. I can understand that she went through 2 horrible relationships. Ok, here goes: shes given me hugs before, without even giving me warning, and she even at one time said "I'm not hitting on you even though you are attractive." She also said that I was very unique, and that she'll miss me a lot. (I'm going outta town for awhile) I did ask her one time if she was dating anyone, and she said no, but she said she's taking a long break before starting again. I've been flirting with a little bit, and she usually flirts back. I'm thinking she probably wants to get to know me very well before starting anything, but then again who knows? Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted April 30, 2004 Share Posted April 30, 2004 I can understand that she went through 2 horrible relationships. Ok, here goes: shes given me hugs before, without even giving me warning, and she even at one time said "I'm not hitting on you even though you are attractive." Is she friendly like this with other male work colleagues? How long has it been since her last relationship? I don't know where you work, but in many work environments hugging people without warning would be considered at least unprofessional and at worst sexual harrassment - that would certainly be the case if it were a man giving uninvitied hugs to women. Granted I may be over-reacting. Did she hug you because of a particularily stressful episode at work and she just wanted to offer some emotional support? Even so, given the heightened awareness about issues of harrassment in the work place I still would still tend to think that this was inappropriate behaviour for anyone, male or female. I can understand your confusion - she hugs you, flirts with you and tells you that you are unique. She could just be the type of person who likes to be ultra-supportive and friendly. Perhaps she is not astute enough to realise that you fancy her despite the fact that you've asked her if she was dating anyone ( a sure give away of romantic interest if you ask me ). ..... but she said she's taking a long break before starting again I would cut out the flirting with this woman at work if I were you. That is not to say that you can't be friendly and supportive. She may indeed like you, she may consider you future dating or boyfriend material, but if she's not ready to start dating other men again then cool it with the flirting and give her the necessary time she needs until she feels she's ready. Link to post Share on other sites
Direpoet Posted May 4, 2004 Share Posted May 4, 2004 Actually there is one other guy she talks to but she doesn't act flirty around him, I even asked her about him if she was dating him (hence the first post I asked the question because I was also curious) she said "no he's not the type I would date, plus I'm taking a break from dating." the funny thing is she talks to him a little bit more but is more flirty and physical with me. Link to post Share on other sites
winterwonderland Posted May 4, 2004 Share Posted May 4, 2004 Only one word comes to my mind. Sex. Look at it this way, he is not dating and guys just can't go without. Why else would guys do what he is doing? This would be perfect for him. Link to post Share on other sites
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