Its been one year

[collegeguy_24]

Its been exactly one year since my ex left me. I will admit its sad to think about, but then to cheer myself up, I decided to go to the Mostly Crue concert in Billings, MT.

 

It was an amazing concert, lots of fun and very loud, I actually lost my hearing for the rest of the night, but it was totally worth it.

 

And one woman flashed her breasts, as a man, that made me happy

 

Also, during a lunch me, my mother, and my brother discussed my past, and current relationship.

 

We talked about how my current GF is a wonderful person, and she is. She doesn't tell me half truths, she doesn't lie, she doesn't manipulate me, and she certainly doesn't cheat.

 

My ex did all the above, and she even confessed to it. Except the cheating, for some strange reason she just doesn't get that what she did was cheating. Some of her friends, former friends, hell even her own mother agrees that what she did was cheat, she is just the only one that doesn't see it.

 

I will admit, I still have some feelings for her, I mean she was the first person I saw myself marrying, and part of me will always love her.

 

But you know what, she is not in my life anymore, I even extended an olive branch of friendship and she threw it in my face. If she wants contact she can initiate.

 

We also discussed how my brother and mother see my ex all the time. Because my ex and my brother go to the same college, and its a small college, he sees her a lot, and my mom does too because she works there.

 

They told me she dyed her hair blonde, she is a natural red head. They also said they catch her smoking quite a bit now.

 

I don't know if its true, but if it is, she has certainly changed from the person I thought I knew.

 

My ex has a very active sexual past, something she told me she regrets, yet at the same time she continues to do after she left me. Its a complete contradiction.

 

Yet with her dying her hair and smoking the descriptions told to me make it sound like she went from a nerdy looking whore to a person who now fits the role.

 

Again, that is based on what was told to me, I haven't seen her in person or any recent photos of her in months, so I don't know.

 

Frankly, I don't care as well.

 

If anything, I pity her now. When we were together she always told me she was glad to be rid of her past, and to focus on the future with me.

 

Now she continues with her same methods as before, one loveless relationship after another.

 

Its a shame, and a pity. She now has a high risk of STDs and she will never know love, cause if she falls for a person and wants a future with them, they will, one way or another find out about her past, and the cheating, and that will cause strain. She brought this on herself.

 

I am still open to being friends with her, but not more then that. I have a girlfriend now, and I will not, ever, leave her for the ex.

 

Heck, even if I was single, and my ex was interested, she would have to work her arse off if she wanted a chance with me.

 

I have choices, if I wanted I could get just about any woman i want, and the one I want is my current GF, not the ex.

 

All I want from her is a friendship, nothing more. I have a girlfriend who I care about, she is beautiful to me, kind, and caring.

 

Another thing we discuses was how my current GF is nice and polite. Yes she has her faults, we all do its part of being human.

 

But her good qualities outweigh her faults by a lot. I like her, I really do, and I hope she knows that as well.

 

I have a lot of faults and frankly I am surprised my GF has stayed with me thus far.

 

I have been working hard to improve my relationship with her and plan to continue doing so. She is my present, my ex is the past. I don't know what the future holds, and I don't care. I plan to focus on the present that is my current GF.

[Nohbody]

Thanks for sharing!

[wilsonx]

Congrats on the year and your story of moving forward.

 

But leave the ex in the past. Tell your family to stop talking to you about it. She is the past and I know she was a big part of your life but what she does now should not concern your or your family in the least. The fact that you want to be friends with someone that cheated and told you half truths tells me that you still have stronger feelings for her then you admit to yourself. You have to truly let go and quit caring about her and even wanting to be friends with her.

 

Good Luck on the Present and the Near Future

[collegeguy_24]

The only reason my family was talking about her was because they were comparing her to my current GF and telling me how my GF is so much better then the ex.

 

And I agree with them.

 

 

I'll accept being friends if she were to initiate, but I'm not going to contact her, ever again. Period.

 

The most I'll do is say Hi if we pass by each other around town, other then that I'm not doing jack.

 

I have my own life to live and she no longer plays a factor in it. My GF plays a role in my life and a big one at that, thats all that matters to me.

[jeff2321]

I am a year out from my ex leaving me and I'm a lot better, but still getting over things. I am through most of the pain, but have almost turned into a hermit the last few months. I'm not dating anyone and I've kid of let myself go. I really need to get myself back out there, but I have just felt depressed lately... Yeah I think I'm severely depressed, but functional enough to hold down an engineering job.

 

I just wanted to congratulate you on your success through heart break and hope someday I can get to where you are.

 

Jeff2321

[reimeivn]

i cant wait to get to that point. only three months out and still think back and feel bad a lot of the times. i feel as if the attachment will take a very long time to fade away.

[stopthemadness]

Its been exactly one year since my ex left me. I will admit its sad to think about, but then to cheer myself up, I decided to go to the Mostly Crue concert in Billings, MT.

 

It was an amazing concert, lots of fun and very loud, I actually lost my hearing for the rest of the night, but it was totally worth it.

 

And one woman flashed her breasts, as a man, that made me happy

 

Also, during a lunch me, my mother, and my brother discussed my past, and current relationship.

 

We talked about how my current GF is a wonderful person, and she is. She doesn't tell me half truths, she doesn't lie, she doesn't manipulate me, and she certainly doesn't cheat.

 

My ex did all the above, and she even confessed to it. Except the cheating, for some strange reason she just doesn't get that what she did was cheating. Some of her friends, former friends, hell even her own mother agrees that what she did was cheat, she is just the only one that doesn't see it.

 

I will admit, I still have some feelings for her, I mean she was the first person I saw myself marrying, and part of me will always love her.

 

But you know what, she is not in my life anymore, I even extended an olive branch of friendship and she threw it in my face. If she wants contact she can initiate.

 

We also discussed how my brother and mother see my ex all the time. Because my ex and my brother go to the same college, and its a small college, he sees her a lot, and my mom does too because she works there.

 

They told me she dyed her hair blonde, she is a natural red head. They also said they catch her smoking quite a bit now.

 

I don't know if its true, but if it is, she has certainly changed from the person I thought I knew.

 

My ex has a very active sexual past, something she told me she regrets, yet at the same time she continues to do after she left me. Its a complete contradiction.

 

Yet with her dying her hair and smoking the descriptions told to me make it sound like she went from a nerdy looking whore to a person who now fits the role.

 

Again, that is based on what was told to me, I haven't seen her in person or any recent photos of her in months, so I don't know.

 

Frankly, I don't care as well.

 

If anything, I pity her now. When we were together she always told me she was glad to be rid of her past, and to focus on the future with me.

 

Now she continues with her same methods as before, one loveless relationship after another.

 

Its a shame, and a pity. She now has a high risk of STDs and she will never know love, cause if she falls for a person and wants a future with them, they will, one way or another find out about her past, and the cheating, and that will cause strain. She brought this on herself.

 

I am still open to being friends with her, but not more then that. I have a girlfriend now, and I will not, ever, leave her for the ex.

 

Heck, even if I was single, and my ex was interested, she would have to work her arse off if she wanted a chance with me.

 

I have choices, if I wanted I could get just about any woman i want, and the one I want is my current GF, not the ex.

 

All I want from her is a friendship, nothing more. I have a girlfriend who I care about, she is beautiful to me, kind, and caring.

 

Another thing we discuses was how my current GF is nice and polite. Yes she has her faults, we all do its part of being human.

 

But her good qualities outweigh her faults by a lot. I like her, I really do, and I hope she knows that as well.

 

I have a lot of faults and frankly I am surprised my GF has stayed with me thus far.

 

I have been working hard to improve my relationship with her and plan to continue doing so. She is my present, my ex is the past. I don't know what the future holds, and I don't care. I plan to focus on the present that is my current GF.[/QUO

 

 

Well good for you on finding your next relationship person. But Gess I almost feel bad for her because you sound like you may have many unresolved issues with your ex? In fact Iam pretty sure you do. See am a little over a year out of my breakup too. And I think I havent found my next relationship person yet because am not ready. I wanta be ready and I feel it comen on any day now (smile) But not yet. I saw a therapist for 7 months and learned ALOT of coping skills. One thing you need to start doing is, Stop talking about your ex!! And ask family and friends to do the same. And if you must talk about them, dont say their name. Say my ex or in the past. Get rid of ALL triggers that make you think of her. Your new person sounds great!! I hope you dont mess it up because it was too soon for you, ya know? Hey am just being real with you. Slow things down, see if that helps. Good luck.........