xxbrokentoyxx Posted April 30, 2004 Share Posted April 30, 2004 OKay, i have went into bad terriotory. Talking with my boyfriend about his mother. I love my boyfriend dearly, but his mother just drives me nuts! Picture the mother of Raymond on everybody loves raymond, for an imagery. She has done a lot for me and my boyfriend and i have always appreciated it, but the little snide comments i cant seem to let go of anymore. Okay first first, my example im about to say isnt that big of a deal but just imagine these same kind of comments for the last 8 months. My boyfriends mother wanted her backyard/ and garden removed. My boyfriend didnt get paid till next friday and we didnt have any cigarettes at the time so we asked her for some and she said only if we did that work. I worked my ass off! His dad was back there working with us and he even complinted me on it, i raked every little crevice did more work than i needed too, for a pack of cigarettes (and she doesnt even know i smoke!) So im out there for 3 hours raking, for a reward she thinks i'll get no use of, but i was happy to do it because it meant less work for my boyfriend, and to show my appreciaton for everything she's done. SHe comes out to look at the job, and says oh it looks nice and my boyfriend said you know look at all this work jenn did she worked her ass off. Of course trying to make me feel good and win a few points with me She goes on about oh it doesnt hurt to get a little skinny thing like her to do work, i hope it didnt take time out of her schedule of painting her nails. And saying stuff like that. My boyfriend gets mad of course i laugh it off and even joke about it with her later. Now a little smart allick remark her and there isnt a big deal but she kept up with it. Her and my mom have talked to each other on the phone twice maybe three times. She repeats the same thing to my mom, also added a couple other comments. The reason i took so much offense, and she knows this too is that i hate girls that are like that. I hate prissy superficial girls yet that is what she has me pinned for in her mind now for some reason. It doesnt stop there Two months before that My boyfriends dad and his mom had the usual monthly fight, and he came and stayed the night at our place. We werent that night but when we came home in the morning and you know no big deal he was sleeping on the couch. Well we go into the bedroom and are having sex, when she just comes walking in the house, walking straight into our bedrooM! and has the audacity to say some rude ****ing comment. Then wakes up her husband to tell him. Im fairly sure the whole family knows about it. The reason im writing this is because last night i found out about what she said to my mom. And me and my boyfriend ended up fighting over it. In the end he said he saw from my perspective and he understood, just of course that it was hard for him to hear that you know. Well im wondering if now he's going to hold some resentment against me and not tell me, and i know no one on this forum can know what he's thinking but advice, and a little insight would help! Sorry this is so long, i had to rant and rave. Always Link to post Share on other sites
Debster Posted April 30, 2004 Share Posted April 30, 2004 Why are you calling his bedroom at his parent's house - your room? I'm not sure of the living situation here. If you laugh off the comments and joke about it with her - how is she to understand that it hurts you? Link to post Share on other sites
amzgmandy Posted May 1, 2004 Share Posted May 1, 2004 I have a simular sitiutation. my husbands mom is very much the same wth the comments. i have learned to ignore her. Never laugh wth her... it feeds her fuel. Also, if your man loves you he will adventually put his foot down. but don't push him too far. His mom is just jealous tht he has a female in his life. Link to post Share on other sites
sportsloving Posted May 1, 2004 Share Posted May 1, 2004 LMAO... it only gets worse if you marry the guy, trust me. My Ex's mom is exactly like that. When we got divorced, she said I took "everything" even though I only took those things I had going into the marriage and what we had agreed to split. So a week after I moved out, she comes with her car packed to the gills with things the poor guy needs; PINK rugs, for every room of his house. Recently she spent a week with him, he was at my house as often as he could be because she was driving him up the wall. I do feel badly for him, but I am glad it isn't my Mum, LOL. One of my dearest friends lives next door to my Ex, and his mother immediately decided she was an awful person... putting her down to her face, making comments and such. All because she now "hates" me. People like this are very unhappy with themselves, so they project it onto whoever they feel is causing their problems. Pick your battles, let her make comments (and just be glad that you don't see the world as she does). You can always make comments or jokes back, but rarely do they even listen to what you say. I can't say it will get better, because in my experience it doesn't. But just remember it isn't you that she isn't liking, it is the fact that you are very special to her son. Any woman he was with would get treated the same. I wish you the best... Link to post Share on other sites
befuddled11 Posted May 1, 2004 Share Posted May 1, 2004 Wow, started getting a headache after reading that convoluted post. What ages are you both? Do you both live at home with your parents? (you live with your parents, he lives with his) I don't get the big "deal" with the yardwork/fingernail painting thing. She was making a joke, what's the big deal? You admitted that you made a joke of it yourself. If you make light of, and jokes about, things she says that you later take offense to, what do you expect from her? And I'm lost about the situation with her walking into the bedroom where you and he are boinking. Did I understand this correctly? She and her husband had a big fight....he spent the night at YOUR (parent's) house, on the couch...then the next morning, and you and he went back to HIS (parent's) house.....were having sex under his parent's roof, and she walked in on you and didn't like the fact that you were both having sex? Huh? Can you be a little more clear. Link to post Share on other sites
Author xxbrokentoyxx Posted May 4, 2004 Author Share Posted May 4, 2004 sorry i know when i was rambling i wasnt to specific, No me and my boyfriend have our own place, but its by his parents house. His dad got kicked out for the night and stayed at our place because he knew we wouldnt mind, and the door was unlocked. HIs mom knew that he had went to our house, so she showed up and walked in. No me and my boyfriend live together in our OWN place. sorry i wasnt very clear Link to post Share on other sites
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