Disillusioned Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 I'd have to take it a little further and ask, does it make a difference to women if the man not only owns a home, but he isn't in any immediate danger of losing it? My answer is HELL NO!!! Since I inherited my home 4 years ago this fall, it hasn't made one damn bit of difference. I speak as someone who has no debts, a steady daytime job and 2 part-time home businesses, health insurance and a 401K... and these things have not attracted ONE WOMAN since I got the house and started living alone. I think the reason is that owning a house, paying the taxes on it, and keeping it maintained are things that require commitment... and that's something that turns women off faster than you can say Jack Robinson. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 (edited) Most good finacial planners will want you to be mortgage heavy if you are young. The tax deduction from owning a home is a huge benefit that helps offset the cost and makes owning a mortgage heavy home cheaper than rent in most cases. Although you have to weigh being comfortable with no tax deductions if your house is paid for. Edited August 14, 2011 by Art_Critic Link to post Share on other sites
Asics Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 I can't believe you even needed to ask this question. The answer is of course yes. Women want men for security, and owning a house is a sign of security and stability, and generally means that you have a job and money. Women are going to give you all kinds of answers to this question because they don't want to be percieved as gold-diggers. Truth is, they will not see a guy as a long term prospect unless he owns a house. Link to post Share on other sites
Disillusioned Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 I can't believe you even needed to ask this question. The answer is of course yes. Women want men for security, and owning a house is a sign of security and stability, and generally means that you have a job and money. Women are going to give you all kinds of answers to this question because they don't want to be percieved as gold-diggers. Truth is, they will not see a guy as a long term prospect unless he owns a house. Maybe the answer is yes in the land down under, but not here in Los Angeles. Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 I have my mortgage paid off so all that's left is utilities and property taxes which are high in NJ. It's great to have that out of the way at such a young age. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 Just wondering if women view single male home owners as a plus. Or it simply does not matter where a man lives, apartment, with roommates, parents basement. It depends a lot on a man's age. If a man is a college aged student, living with the parents is not a detriment. But if he has graduated and has a job, I think women expect him to be living away from the parents (unless he has to take care of a disabled or elderly parent). If a man is past 30, a lot of women would consider it a plus if he owned his own home. It's a sign of success, achievement, and responsibility. Link to post Share on other sites
LoveandSuch Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 Women prefer a man in his parent's basement. Lol. Link to post Share on other sites
tigressA Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 A man owning a home doesn't matter to me. If he just has his own place whether he rents or owns, that is what's most important to me. If he's still living with his parents beyond a certain age, that's a turn-off. I'm not a fan of roommates beyond a certain age either, but IMO that's better than still being with one's parents. Link to post Share on other sites
musemaj11 Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 Its okay to want a certain standard in a potential mate as long as you meet the same standard yourself. What make me roll my eyes are people who want this and that in someone else while they dont even have those things themselves. Link to post Share on other sites
lonelyheartbeat Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 I have to admit, when I first saw this thread my answer was yes. However, after reading the responses it's made me contemplate my answer. I've come to the conclusion that what has been said already is true. I don't think I care if a guy rents or owns his apartment/condo/house. If he's got a job and is financially responsible, that's all that's important. But I must also say, as a female who turned 30 this year and really wants to settle down with the right guy, a man who owns his own place is certainly a plus. Shows me that he's serious enough about a home, so he might just be interested in settling down with a special someone and start a family. Not saying that's true for all guys, but for me, that's what I think. Link to post Share on other sites
LoveandSuch Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 Its okay to want a certain standard in a potential mate as long as you meet the same standard yourself. What make me roll my eyes are people who want this and that in someone else while they dont even have those things themselves. Yeah, but then again the same people who are against this are the same ones who were impressed by the Royal Wedding and how sweet it was the Prince married way below his family's means. I do not see anything wrong with it, if both parties are happy in their arrangements. Link to post Share on other sites
motive2002 Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 I've heard a saying that I like, and I'll repeat it here: "It's not where you live, it's how you live." Link to post Share on other sites
aquablue Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 Yes, I find home ownership a very attractive quality in a man. I own my own home and am financially stable and have a plan for retirement, therefore I want a partner who is able to contribute equally to this and have goals/plans of their own that line up with mine. Not saying that I wouldn't date a man who rents because I will and I have. I wouldn't date somebody who wasn't independant on their own two feel though and living at home with the parents. Link to post Share on other sites
Negative Nancy Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 Yes, I find home ownership a very attractive quality in a man. I own my own home then what's the point in the man having his own home? say you decide to move in together and start a family, whose house you're gonna live in? both? not possible. 1 week here, 1 week there? pretty inconvenient. you can't live in both houses at the same time, so it's pretty useless to judge a man like that. Link to post Share on other sites
grkBoy Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 When I lived at home, saving up a down payment, women were turned off. When I bought a condo, it was a 180° flip. I bought one though because I wanted to. Dating had nothing to do with it. Link to post Share on other sites
zengirl Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 It certainly isn't a negative... I have owned a home since my early 20s and can attest that it is a plus I think it may be a plus for many women, but for me, it's actually a negative. I don't like the idea that the guy isn't as open to starting a life WITH me should things get serious. Guys who own homes seem to be (my observation) more into fitting a girl that fits their "mold" of the life they already know they want, but guys who still aren't quite there yet but are still relationship oriented tend to be more into the idea of building a life together. But then, my last exBF buying a home was probably a strong part of why we broke up, as well as my ex-fiance from a few years back. I don't want to be another accessory in someone's already settled life; I want to get settled together. As you get towards the end of your 30s, I think this dynamic changes. I just think guys who buy houses super-early AND are relationship oriented tend to have this "I want a wife" mentality where it's more about wanting the wife and family and less about the individual woman. Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyDude Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 Any women who has a problem with a guy not having a house in this economy and job market needs her damm head examined and must never stay updated on current events Link to post Share on other sites
Jynxx Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 I don't have a house as I haven't decided yet in what country I would like to eventually settle, but LOL at people thinking they "own a house" and owe 80% of its value to the bank. Link to post Share on other sites
thatone Posted August 15, 2011 Share Posted August 15, 2011 i own (half, for the reason jynxx posted ) of my house. here's something for you all to consider... the idea of a home being a good investment and displaying responsibility and long term goals and all that stuff? bullsh*t. a house is a terrible investment. always has been. someone with a glancing perusal of the financial markets every now and then will earn more over time than someone relying on a home as an investment every time. even just putting your money in an S&P mirror fund and never touching it for 30 years would earn you 5x over what a house will appreciate in value over the same amount of time. if you buy a house you want for the aesthetic value, or buy a house comparable in cost to what you would pay to rent, that's all fine and good. but someone who pays enough for a house that they don't invest any money elsewhere is a fool. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted August 15, 2011 Share Posted August 15, 2011 (edited) I don't like the idea that the guy isn't as open to starting a life WITH me should things get serious. Guys who own homes seem to be (my observation) more into fitting a girl that fits their "mold" of the life they already know they want, but guys who still aren't quite there yet but are still relationship oriented tend to be more into the idea of building a life together. I get that.. it in a way that emulates me... I have owned my business for over 30 years in the same approx city I live in.. So my location has always been set in stone.. There is no moving the company and certainly not for a girl.. I was engaged to a woman one time that wanted me to sell my stock and uproot everything to move to another state... that was about 24 years ago and I can tell you that it would have been the biggest mistake of my life. I certainly would have sold any of my homes when I got married.. Right now it just so happens that both of the homes we have aren't going up for sale anytime soon though.. have you seen the real estate market We do kinda have plans to get rid of this monster of a house and the log cabin one day and buy something smaller to live in and larger to have on the weekends... So I get that a guy with a home can be set in stone.. so to speak..but I will say my wife has been great about that.. She sold her home when we got married.. pocketed the money and we redecorated this home to suit her instead of me.. I wonder how many other women are out there that feel the way you do about why it is a negative.. Interesting perspective... Edited August 15, 2011 by Art_Critic Link to post Share on other sites
zengirl Posted August 15, 2011 Share Posted August 15, 2011 Right now it just so happens that both of the homes we have aren't going up for sale anytime soon though.. have you seen the real estate market Yeah, I find the guys who buy now don't seem to realize that the market has changed either. . . I mean, they do, and they buy for the "great low prices" but who's to say it's really tanked? Or that it'll be easy to unload? For me, a house is something you buy when you're ready to have a family, not as an investment, but only when you're committed to that area. And if a guy is older (35+) and still unmarried, I get him wanting to buy a house if he's 100% committed to the area. But not if he thinks he might get married soon . . . why not just wait. In the case of my fiance, it was really bad because we were already living together, and he bought a house "to surprise me" --- this was before the market tanked too, so he still has that house back in the city I used to live in (I traveled around all after that, and settled down somewhere else last fall), wanted to move cities, and couldn't. He knew I wanted to travel potentially and it was a source of frustration between us---he had even agreed at various points that he wanted to too, but I suspected (correctly) he just wanted to be with me and really didn't---and he bought the house as a ploy to convince me not to travel but to stay and marry him. Really crap move. I'm not committed to the area I live in and actively want to move after I finish my PhD. But so does my BF and we like the same places. So I'm hoping to find someone more my speed, and that likely colors my views. I'm not saying unmarried dudes with houses are all bad guys or anything. Link to post Share on other sites
irc333 Posted August 15, 2011 Share Posted August 15, 2011 Just wondering if women view single male home owners as a plus. Or it simply does not matter where a man lives, apartment, with roommates, parents basement. I'm single, thus I don't need to be a homeowner, but it'll something I'll consider if I ever get married. Owning a home is something more couples or married tend to do. Link to post Share on other sites
OliveOyl Posted August 15, 2011 Share Posted August 15, 2011 My BF owns a home that he bought with his ex (but now he retains ownership). If he lived closer it would be a positive thing, but he lives in an area that I wouldn't want to move to (a bit too far away from the "pulse" of the greater metropolitan area). Maybe it's a good thing because it prevents us from rushing into the moving-in together phase. He'd have to sell it or rent it out and we'd both have to move for that to happen. I think if a guy owned a nice home that was close by that would be lovely, but in general, at this stage/age owning a home doesn't really make a difference to me concerning "attractiveness." As long as a guy is able to be self-sufficient that's all that really matters. And at age 50 he better not be living in his parent's basement. Link to post Share on other sites
Pierre Posted August 15, 2011 Share Posted August 15, 2011 I have a large home and it is professionally decorated. I think it helps a lot! The maids clean it once a week and most women enjoy a well kept residence. Way better than having a room mate bin a tiny apartment. Link to post Share on other sites
irc333 Posted August 15, 2011 Share Posted August 15, 2011 I have a large home and it is professionally decorated. I think it helps a lot! The maids clean it once a week and most women enjoy a well kept residence. Way better than having a room mate bin a tiny apartment.. Well, hello Mr. Moneybags. Link to post Share on other sites
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