heartogold Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Hello my name is S me and my wife were having problems sometime back and I recentley found out after five years of marriage she slept with another man Im heart broken shes the only women I have ever ben with. As a child her parents sheltered her to much they never would let her go out. And since we have ben married were I was working alot and she dont have a license it bothered her real bad I think like she was reliving her childhood she lost her mom. And that devestated her cause her dad was already dead. But I dont understand her I love her and have always ben here for her but she always turns to other people its like she pushes away the people that realy care and the ones that use her and manipulate her are the ones she runs to like this guy she wanted to have a week away frome me space to figure things out she stayed with relatives and while she was there slept with a friend of the family called me on the phone and said its over that she dont deserve me that she made a big mistake I picked her up frome her relatives and she toald me she slep with this guy and I forgave her but still at first she was shocked and even mad at me for this I toald her its unconditional love. But Im still confused its like she isnt even here some times like she has to have all these people in her life to be happy I dont understand does she love me? Or could this be hoples we also have a three year old son together wich complicats things more!!! Link to post Share on other sites
2011aug Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 You also have a 3 years old son (mentioned in another post). She made a conscious decision to cheat. I would think you need to stop making excuses for her for the cheating. Cheating is 100% her fault. She knows this and that is why she is behaving differently now. Questions you should ask are possibly these: 1. Will the adultery bother you? Will you always be thinking about it? Will you wonder whenever she is away from the house what she is doing? Will the images in your mind of another man screwing your wife bother you? 2. Is she still seeing the other man? 3. What are the advantages of staying married? Dont do it for the son. If you stayed in the marriage, it probably will do more harm to the son because kids can pick up these things. 4. Will she cheat again? You need to realize once a person cheated, the next time is easier because she has already crossed a threshold. Link to post Share on other sites
2011aug Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 heartogold, you will probably get more/better comments/advice if you ask to have this thread of yours moved to the Infidelity subforum. Link to post Share on other sites
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