Author beefolive Posted August 19, 2011 Author Share Posted August 19, 2011 We have never talked about that to be honest..perhaps that may be a genuine issue however my gut suggests it is a culmination of all of my mess ups!. I can admit they were all my fault and I want to change things for both myself and for her however I fear I may not get the chance It's strange, I can't understand how we went from being so together and speaking so much to being so far away and her being so COLD. Am I being stupid or is there any real hope, I was ready to accept things and try to move on before I got that text last night. I've taken it as a sign of hope when the reality is it might not be? I fear she has friends and family trying to influence her thoughts..I'll never change and I won't be good enough! Link to post Share on other sites
Pierre Posted August 19, 2011 Share Posted August 19, 2011 If I had a GF for two years and we were in love I would have discussed a future together. How old are you? What is her family background? Does she come from a typical household with mom and dad and siblings? Link to post Share on other sites
Author beefolive Posted August 19, 2011 Author Share Posted August 19, 2011 I'm 27 and she is 25...we have had brief conversations more in a joking manor than anything else. Link to post Share on other sites
Pierre Posted August 19, 2011 Share Posted August 19, 2011 I'm 27 and she is 25...we have had brief conversations more in a joking manor than anything else. If you look at her family you should have a pretty good idea if she is looking for marriage. Perhaps, I am 100% wrong and she does not want to be married at all. Only you can make this assessment. What do you think? Is she the type that want a family or does she want to remain single and travel the world? How about you? What do you want? What is her family like? Link to post Share on other sites
Author beefolive Posted August 19, 2011 Author Share Posted August 19, 2011 Her family is perfect, mum and dad married for 20 odd years. Myself, id love to be with her and marry her. Maybe she was thinking about that however i do not know. It may have been all of the above At the moment she hasnt replied to my text about what we would avhieve by meeting up so im not holding out much hope Link to post Share on other sites
Pierre Posted August 19, 2011 Share Posted August 19, 2011 Her family is perfect, mum and dad married for 20 odd years. Myself, id love to be with her and marry her. Maybe she was thinking about that however i do not know. It may have been all of the above At the moment she hasnt replied to my text about what we would avhieve by meeting up so im not holding out much hope If you really love her and if you both have jobs and are independent and if you dated for two years you need to ask her to marry you. Don't wait any longer. GO to her apartment with a huge proposing banner and called from the sidewalk. Hire some street muscians to play a love song she likes. I suspect this girl wants marriage and i also suspect you take her for granted and don't do romantic stuff. Link to post Share on other sites
Author beefolive Posted August 19, 2011 Author Share Posted August 19, 2011 I agree with your comment re perhaps neglecting the romantic element of our relationship...again we were in the comfort zone and both took each other for granted. Im dubious about your suggestion of proposing to her...she isnt even replying to my text at the moment. I would think she would believe that to be a knee jerk reaction. I would prefer to try to fix things with us and propose to her one day under better circumstances. Does that sound silly?. I perhaps feel ive misread the situation and her saying 'what do you hope to achiev by meeting up' was said as a its not going to fix anything kinda text?????? im going through phases of having hope and then none Link to post Share on other sites
iJester Posted August 19, 2011 Share Posted August 19, 2011 You'd be a complete ****ing idiot to propose to her right now. Especially with a banner and some musicians...what about a ring? Your used-to-be relationship is nonexistent and you've already shown just how clingy you are. A marriage proposal right now would just make you look nuts. Anyway, don't worry about her reply, just pretend it's not coming and start moving on. Maybe she'll surprise you, but you need to already be working on yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
Author beefolive Posted August 19, 2011 Author Share Posted August 19, 2011 many thanks for the advice Link to post Share on other sites
Pierre Posted August 20, 2011 Share Posted August 20, 2011 I agree with your comment re perhaps neglecting the romantic element of our relationship...again we were in the comfort zone and both took each other for granted. Im dubious about your suggestion of proposing to her...she isnt even replying to my text at the moment. I would think she would believe that to be a knee jerk reaction. I would prefer to try to fix things with us and propose to her one day under better circumstances. Does that sound silly?. I perhaps feel ive misread the situation and her saying 'what do you hope to achiev by meeting up' was said as a its not going to fix anything kinda text?????? im going through phases of having hope and then none Make no mistake about it. It is a true act of desperation, but you lose nothing by trying something different and daring. This is no time to play relationship games. I don't advise playing hard to get at this time. I suspect you have really neglected your gf. You need to learn to be romantic and pay a lot of attention to women. She is struggling with the breakup and you will have a window of opportunity. The more you delay this the deeper she will get into her NC pattern. You need to be super romantic. Link to post Share on other sites
Author beefolive Posted August 20, 2011 Author Share Posted August 20, 2011 Ok so I'll update you on the situation...I still havnt received a reply.it's been less than 24 hours but I'm not holding out much hope anymore...is that stupid? I'm not sure if it was a come and get me text!. What I don't understand is how she can be so cold when only 3 weeks ago we were talking about going away on holiday!. Is it her way of coping? I will see her again in two weeks when our work holidays finish...what should I do until then? Wish her the best and go NC till then..hopefully make her mish me? Or just cut my losses and try to move on? I don't want to give up hope but she is giving me no reason to have hope? Link to post Share on other sites
Pierre Posted August 20, 2011 Share Posted August 20, 2011 Ok so I'll update you on the situation...I still havnt received a reply.it's been less than 24 hours but I'm not holding out much hope anymore...is that stupid? I'm not sure if it was a come and get me text!. What I don't understand is how she can be so cold when only 3 weeks ago we were talking about going away on holiday!. Is it her way of coping? I will see her again in two weeks when our work holidays finish...what should I do until then? Wish her the best and go NC till then..hopefully make her mish me? Or just cut my losses and try to move on? I don't want to give up hope but she is giving me no reason to have hope? Holy Shyte!!!!!! I sense no passion in your words or modus operandi (MO). Wait for two more weeks of NC is not correct. She will grow stronger with every additional minute of NC and your window to reignite the relationp will become very narrow. If you do nothing at this point you are simply reaffirming to her your non-chalant (I don't give a shyte) MO. This is the way you treated her for two years. More of the same is not going to work. This is not time for false self pride and count the hours since you texted her. You do your best and if she does not return to you then you walk away with your head high. It would be much worse to lose her because you did nothing. Forget the false pride. You are acting as if you only knew her for two weeks instead of two years. Link to post Share on other sites
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