Anonymous15 Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 Hi everyone. There is a girl that has really captivated me but I'm not sure if there is any way I can approach her without scaring her away. Here's the situation. I work as a programmer so I work really late hours (into the early morning several times a week.) Right outside my office is one of those flower vending machines. Well, I've noticed that the same girl comes to restock the machine once a week betwen 11pm-midnight. I've never seen a girl as beautiful as her. The crazy thing is, she's often smiling and actually seems to be happy restocking a machine with flowers all by herself when most people are asleep. Whenever I see her out my window, always late at night, I can't help but wonder what she's like. The problem, of course, is how can I approach her? The only time I could potentially talk to her is way late in the evening when she's doing her thing. I'm sure she'd be freaked out if I just walked outside and started talking to her--she'd probably assume I'm a psycho. I realize that in most likelihood, this is just a physical infatuation but I feel like I should at least do something in case it's more. Any suggestions? P.S. I'm in my mid 20's (if it makes any difference) but because of my career, I've found it really hard to meet any women I'm interested in. I mostly work with guys and I'm tired of the bar scene. Link to post Share on other sites
average guy Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 How do you know SHE is not a psycho? Anyway, do something non-threatening like smile ate her from your office window (if you have to knock on the glass to get her attantion and wave at her) keep doing this for a few nights until she knows you and realises that you work there and gets used to you. Then one night maybe pput a piece of paper up to the window that says "Will you marry me?" (just kidding) maybe try going for a cup of coffee first Anyway, you will soon get an idea if she is interested and can go from there ps. When you do talk to her, keep it simple and fun. I've known programmers before that couldn't make as simple a small conversation as talking about the weather without freaking out, so just relax and be nice and smile Good luck! A.G. Link to post Share on other sites
Anonymous15 Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 Originally posted by average guy How do you know SHE is not a psycho? Anyway, do something non-threatening like smile ate her from your office window (if you have to knock on the glass to get her attantion and wave at her) keep doing this for a few nights until she knows you and realises that you work there and gets used to you. Then one night maybe pput a piece of paper up to the window that says "Will you marry me?" (just kidding) maybe try going for a cup of coffee first Anyway, you will soon get an idea if you is interested and can go from there ps. When you do talk to her, keep it simple and fun. I've known programmers before that couldn't make as simple a small conversation as talking about the weather without freaking out, so just relax and be nice and smile Good luck! A.G. Thanks for the advice but won't knocking on the window and waving be a bit weird too? Won't she wonder whether she knows me and if she realizes she doesn't, won't she wonder why the hell I'm waving at her? My personality is that of an anti-programmer in the sense that I have no problems talking to people (girls included) and am pretty social. I'm pretty athletic too which makes me wonder how I got into this industry in the first place. Still, I think it's the scenario I'm working with that makes it difficult. If she's a psycho, I don't mind cause she's a HOT psycho. Link to post Share on other sites
average guy Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 Originally posted by Anonymous15 If she's a psycho, I don't mind cause she's a HOT psycho. I think you have just solved a lot of these relationship problems!!! LOL Link to post Share on other sites
Thinkalot Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 What about you be totally honest? "Excuse me, but can't help but notice your usually here around this time...I am too, with this job of mine. Look, I know this might seem a bit odd, or forward, but I was actually wondering if you'd like to maybe go and have a coffee with me sometime, during daylight hours? " If you are feeling game, and she seems receptive, you could make a joke about thinking she's beautiful...but say it in a lighthearted way so she doesn't feel threatened and think you are laying it on too thick! If I was her, I'd be flattered, and then she can control things if she wants to and finds itless threatening, by taking your number. Nothing ventured nothing gained. I initially asked my guy out for coffee after meditation class! 3 years later and we are happily together still. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 There's this thing called 'the truth'. Give it a try. "I was looking out my window during my boring work shift upstairs and noticed you looking very happy at your job. I thought that was great and wanted to tell you so." That oughtn't freak anybody out. Link to post Share on other sites
Anonymous15 Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 Originally posted by Thinkalot What about you be totally honest? "Excuse me, but can't help but notice your usually here around this time...I am too, with this job of mine. Look, I know this might seem a bit odd, or forward, but I was actually wondering if you'd like to maybe go and have a coffee with me sometime, during daylight hours? " If you are feeling game, and she seems receptive, you could make a joke about thinking she's beautiful...but say it in a lighthearted way so she doesn't feel threatened and think you are laying it on too thick! If I was her, I'd be flattered, and then she can control things if she wants to and finds itless threatening, by taking your number. Nothing ventured nothing gained. I initially asked my guy out for coffee after meditation class! 3 years later and we are happily together still. What if she replies, "Oh. I'm sorry but I can't be out when there's daylight--but I can meet you for dinner tomorrow night." Should I be worried? Haha. So you think I should just walk out there, huh? I'm still afraid she'll be a bit threatened considering the hour it'll be. I have an idea: Would this be cheesy or what? What if I went out there, just said hello, and then bought one of the flowers out of the machine and gave it to her before I started talking to her. You think that would break the ice at all or be even worse than just going out there and talking to her? I had another idea. I could buy one of the flowers before hand so I could put a note in the machine. It could say something like, "Hello there. This note is from the guy that you can see through the window slaving away at work. I wanted to know if you'd like to hang out sometime. If so, wave and I'll come out to talk to you. If not, no worries. Have a great night/morning." She'll get the note while she's restocking the machines. Link to post Share on other sites
Anonymous15 Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 Or how about the casual take my time approach. I could just walk out there like I need some fresh air or something and start a conversation like I never noticed her before. I could say stuff like, "Wow. I didn't think there'd be anyone out here at this hour. Do you always have to work out here this late? How do you like it, etc." And just leave it at small talk and continue next time. Maybe after 2-3 conversations like this, after asking what she does during the day (another job, school, etc), I could then ask her out. Link to post Share on other sites
Thinkalot Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 Yep, moimeme's thinking along the same lines as me. Try being honest with her. It's not usually intimidating and you'll earn respect if nothing else. Link to post Share on other sites
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