Totally frivolous issue, but opinions welcome

[moimeme]

If you're battling weight problems, don't read this. Or at least don't get mad at me if you do.

 

I wanted to ditch a bunch of pounds which landed on me over the course of two stressful years (chocolate can only do so much before it becomes counterproductive ) I set about changing my eating habits and exercising again and it worked. We're not talking hundreds of pounds, but 15-20 is a significant amount extra and my wardrobe told me so.

 

I'm back in the clothes I kept because I was not buying a new wardrobe to accommodate the extra weight. I feel great, have all my usual energy plus more, and I can feel that I'm stronger and more fit.

 

Now here's the sticker. People are telling me I look thin; particularly that my face looks thin. I'm not anorexic, I swear. I just measured me and all my measurements are perfectly normal - I'm definitely not skinny. The clothes I mentioned fit comfortably; they are definitely not loose. I have a sort of thinnish face anyway and, wouldn't you know it, that's where some weight dropped. I could've used another two inches off my waist but no.

 

So, yes, it's not much of a worry but if you were me, what would you do? Eat more so my face fattens up again? Wear Tammy Faye makeup so people don't pay attention to the thinness? Forget about it all and spend my time praying for world peace?

[End of my rope]

And if you gained your weight back so people would shut up about your face looking thin...then you would be unhappy. They've just grown accustomed to seeing your face a little pudgy and so it now looks to thin to them. Do what makes you happy.

[sportsloving]

I can relate, ugh. I was a happy size ten, then going through the last year, something happened and now I am a size six. I didn't do anything to make things this way, it simply is. My friend was over checking out all the photos on my walls and said what happened? You looked so healthy here? Hmmm. I don't recall being unhealthy.

 

I am not about to change anything for anyone so I figure they either like me the way I am or not, not my problem. I look like I do because of the year or so I lived through, so they can eat my dust

[Thinkalot]

Merry, funnily enough, I have to say I am currently in the same boat. I gained weight some years back, then lost it (and picked up an eating disorder along the way)...got over the eating disorder, and my weight stabilised.

 

BUT, sometimes, when I am really active or busy, I shed a bit extra, and people start telling me I look too thin. I lose it on my face and bust too. At the moment, I am on the lighter side of where I usually sit, and I certainly don't have a food problem now either! I eat well, I eat healthily, and I eat chocolate.

I just do a lot of activity...surfing, gym, running, dancing whatever...and I don't eat much junk.

 

I've been wondering what to do about it too. If I put more weight on, I'll get bigger hips again and more of a tummy I guess, but my face will fill out, and my bra size will go back up to maybe decent A cup! LOL! I like being slim, I like my clothes fitting comfortably...I'm not too concerned with my size, but others say I look better with a bit more weight (including those who know me best, my partner, mum etc).

 

Here's what I have decided to do: Make sure I eat well, and don't miss meals, or skimp on lunch etc evenif I'm busy or distracted...and indulge in some extra snacks when I feel like it without worrying too much. Keep exercising at the same time, and work on muscle tone ( I do anyway...but make sure I don't let it slip). I'm especially going to do leg exercises. That way, I figure I'll stay toned and shapely, even if I have some extra pounds covering the whole package! Meanwhile, whenever I visit my mum, she keeps feeding me chocolate milk drinks...lol!

 

I reckon it's a fine line. Gain a bit, and your face fills back out a bit, and people think you look good and healthy again...when you've done that...work on maintaining and not losing too much, and keeping toned. Usually people's weight tends to bounce around a bit, but hovers around a certain spot. I'm currently a size 8. And I'm only 5'2

[bluechocolate]

Now here's the sticker. People are telling me I look thin; particularly that my face looks thin

 

Thank them for noticing that your revolutionary new face-diet is highly successful and offer to divulge your secrets for an obscene amount of money.

[moimeme]

Thanks, all! I may try a little of each and meanwhile learn to ignore the looks of benevolent concern

[FreeMe]

As I've gotten older, I don't even gain weight in my face anymore. Used to be when I was in my early 20s, if I gained weight, I would gain it all over and my face would get chubbier. After my early 30s, what used to be in my upper body basically seems to have sank. I have to lose more weight to lose it in my legs, so I start to look too thin in my upper body. As far as I'm concerned, people just have to get over it. I'm not going to be uncomfortable about wearing shorts just because people can see one or two of my ribs.

 

If you're healthy and comfortable with yourself, then you're at the right weight for you. One thing you may want to consider is a new hairstyle. If you go to someone who is really good - or maybe read up on hairstyles - you can find one that may make your face appear fuller. Also, hair color can make a difference. I have a fair complexion so when I let my hair get to it's natural dark color, my features are emphasized more. Techniques with makeup can also put more or less emphasis on the shape of your face. I don't know much about it, but there are lots of websites on those kinds of things.

[moimeme]

One thing you may want to consider is a new hairstyle

 

My usually-excellent stylist gave me a cut that really did not work last time. It made all my natural waves do really bizarre sticky-outy things . It's quite possible that people are saying I look thin when they really mean I look like a wild woman LOL.

[FreeMe]

LOL - I know what you mean. I have curly hair too and if it's not cut right the same thing happens.

[wideawake]

I'm in the same boat as you moi,

 

Whenever my weight goes up or down, the first place it's noticed is in my face.

 

Now I like my body around 11% body fat, but at that level, my face has deep shallows in the cheeks, very pronounced cheek bones and I personally think that I tend to look a little sickly (though my girl really digs it).

 

Truth be told I like my face around 14% body fat, as that's where I tend to look healthy, and still have some definition in my jaw line (no where near as at 10% though...), but of course I also tend to put on the other weight only around my mid-section at that higher body fat level, and I hate that.

 

I'm about 14% right now, and I'm looking to hit around 11% by late June or so, and I guess I'll just deal with it.

 

I think a lot of it has to do with how people have viewed you in the past, and than when you show up with a dramatic differences at different body fat levels, than people freak when they see the new skinny face. I also tend to think that these days, anytime you lose some weight and get really lean, people tend to think you have some kind of illness or something.

 

I say just deal with the new you, and don't sweat it. You're going to be healthier and enjoy life more if you're comfortable with your body and I guess that's worth the occasional questions, "Dude, are you ok?".

 

Now, on another tangent. I'm fairly certain that you could cook up some kind of transdermal gel that would inhibit fat loss from localized adipose tissue via application of certain actives.

 

Not sure about what actives though...but it's something I may look into in the next few weeks. I'd love to get down to 10-11% and during that time really reduce the fat loss in my face...

 

Pretty good probs to have though, huh?

[midori]

Originally posted by moimeme

Forget about it all and spend my time praying for world peace?

 

I wouldn't give it a second thought. Commenting on a person's weight is a tricky business. If you notice that someone has lost weight it might well be a good thing, but to say "wow, you look great, you've lost weight, haven't you?" can be taken amiss by some. They think, "was I so fat before? It wasn't that much weight, but if I hadn't lost it would this person be thinking, 'she'd look so much better if she'd just lose some weight.'" So I think some people try to remark about the weight loss in a way that conveys that they don't think you necessarily needed to lose the weight, and moreover to convey that they're not suggesting that you ought to lose more weight.

 

Unless it's one of my friends who has recovered her pre-pregnancy figure, I find I don't comment on minor weight losses specifically. It's too fraught with potential for wounded feelings!

[brashgal]

I was going to make the hairstyle comment also - long hair can make a thin face seem even more drawn. Also, makeup - focus on your eyes. Sometimes too it has to do with the clothes you wear, different necklines might be more flattering than others, different colors may be more flattering than others. I find now that I am getting grayer and my face has aged, I look better in pastels rather than bold colors or black. Give yourself a mini-makeover, buy a couple flattering color/neckline t-shirts for summer, change your makeup - they'll stop commenting on how thin you look and tell you how fabulous you look!