Inappropriate Friendship

[jjlil]

I have a dilemma. I've been married 12 years and up until very recently everything was fine. My husband and I are partners in business and last year a new client came on board. I met her a couple of time in a business setting...my husband however became friends with her on a personal level. The initial reason appeared to be that he had an art hobby and she was interested in joining classes. She was in a long term relationship and living with someone and my husband asked if I minded her attending the art class with him. I said no.

 

They have been friends since (I have not been involved in the 'friendship' at all) but things have gathered pace considerably. About six weeks ago she split with her partner & this is where it gets strange...she moved from a town 20 miles away to two blocks away (my husband helped her find the accomodation). She asked him out for a one on one meal to thank him for being a good friend...he told me right away but this made me feel very uncomfortable and I told him so..he agreed and the meal never went ahead. She then started offering him rides to places in her car to help him out. He said she was just being friendly. I then discover she has been meeting up with him in the morning while walking respective dogs. This came out in conversation with my husband when he casually mentioned it. Then she asked him if she could tag along one day while he was working as she felt very low. My husband has told me all of this in a very flippant 'she is just a friend in need' way. The final straw was the cell phone bill which showed 250 texts in a one month period. When I flipped, my husband said I could read them all and gave me his phone. They were all there and appeared fairly innocent...discussing art etc but am not happy with how far this friendship has gone. He spends more time talking to her than he does me. I have told him how I feel and he says in hindsight that maybe things do look strange and that if I want he will cool it with her (I know he is not happy doing this though). I feel I want to confront her too but he doesn't want me to do this and says I am completely over reacting.

I wonder if her intentions are more sinister ..well I wonder lots of things.

Thanks

[ver13]

IMO I feel that you are right on point about her intentions and your husband who might be enjoying all the attention needs to back off. Just ask him how he would see this situation if it were you instead of him that had this type of relationship with a male friend.