CopingGal Posted August 24, 2011 Share Posted August 24, 2011 Here's my list. My ex: -is a compulsive liar -has no remorse for the hurtful things he does -is arrogant -is narcissistic -has boundries issues -jumps from woman to woman -acts as if women are interchangeable with other women -does not respect women Link to post Share on other sites
Buttercup84 Posted August 24, 2011 Share Posted August 24, 2011 - he lied to me about how he felt and signed up to a dating site a day before we broke up - he was obsessed with guns - he was superficial - he never looked after me when I was sick - he spoke badly about me to his friends - he put me down a lot and critised me - he spent all weekend playing wow - he made remarks about good looking girls - his porn - racist and very easily angry Link to post Share on other sites
Author CopingGal Posted August 24, 2011 Author Share Posted August 24, 2011 Wow Buttercup, I am glad you are away from him. Reading yours reminds me of things I forgot to put on mine: -he was manipulative -he gave me crumbs of his time -he kept me from his friends and family and treated me like his dirty little secret -controlling Link to post Share on other sites
Buttercup84 Posted August 24, 2011 Share Posted August 24, 2011 Thanks Hun , am glad you're away from yours too ! My ex was controlling too . Why do we still hurt because of them ? Gah . Hope you're ok xxx Link to post Share on other sites
Misar7 Posted August 24, 2011 Share Posted August 24, 2011 Oh let me join! -Liar -Cheater -Manipulative -Said I never gave him what he needed yet he gave me NOTHING at all of himself -sex addict -pothead -xbox addict -I was always last on his list -Only does things if he can get something out of it -Has no remorse for anything -Jealous -Insecure -Selfish -Egotistical -Loves to brag about his high school days..you are 30 get over it! -Lazy -Is all about something head first then just as quickly is done with it never sticks to anything! Well he has a new woman now so maybe he will change and be a great man cause she makes him so happy! Oh Dear I could go on and on LOL Link to post Share on other sites
Buttercup84 Posted August 24, 2011 Share Posted August 24, 2011 Our ex's are gems arnt they ? good riddance to them ! Link to post Share on other sites
Author CopingGal Posted August 24, 2011 Author Share Posted August 24, 2011 You are right. Good riddance! I'm okay and getting stronger. Link to post Share on other sites
John Michael Kane Posted August 24, 2011 Share Posted August 24, 2011 Because she's a cheater and a selfish POS liar. Link to post Share on other sites
shayla Posted August 24, 2011 Share Posted August 24, 2011 Here's my list. My ex: -is a compulsive liar -has no remorse for the hurtful things he does -is arrogant -is narcissistic -has boundries issues -jumps from woman to woman -acts as if women are interchangeable with other women -does not respect women -Manipulative -I was always last on his list -Only does things if he can get something out of it -Has no remorse for anything -Jealous -Insecure -Selfish Other posters got to this list first. It is so funny how all these men have the same traits. Link to post Share on other sites
loverboy1984 Posted August 24, 2011 Share Posted August 24, 2011 -Fake - easily manipulated by others - no real personality, imitates what looks good - lacks substance - disrespectful - too shy - doesn't have a drivers license - bad communication skills - pretends to love - ungrateful - lets her friends talk her into things - hypocrite - not as affectionate as me - Emotionally cheated on me and lied, stringing me along - Lies about her feelings - Last but not least, did not appreciate what she had. God Bless her, shes dead.....in my heart Link to post Share on other sites
Nohbody Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 I don't think I am disgusted by her. I'm just very sad and sometimes very angry. Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGal Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 for many of the reasons you all listed and because he has the emotional spectrum of a 12 year old which spans from cute/happy quickly to temper tantrum angry. Zero communication skills or ability to be honest with himself. Link to post Share on other sites
coltsfan1 Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 -Fake - easily manipulated by others - no real personality, imitates what looks good - lacks substance - disrespectful - too shy - doesn't have a drivers license - bad communication skills - pretends to love - ungrateful - lets her friends talk her into things - hypocrite - not as affectionate as me - Emotionally cheated on me and lied, stringing me along - Lies about her feelings - Last but not least, did not appreciate what she had. God Bless her, shes dead.....in my heart my ex to a T, except the ability to drive!!! Link to post Share on other sites
solobeary Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 - His family are just about the most selfish people I've ever met - I thought he was different, but the way he's acted has shown he's very selfish also - He's kind of a loser. He doesn't have any close friends. - I never really had much fun hanging around his friends. The only time I'd have fun around them was the few times they had parties and friends of his friends would come, and I'd stay up late having fun with them and him and his freinds would go home super early or just have boring conversations with each other. - He is a follower who's desperate for approval, and sensible people can tell. - His self esteem is so pathetically low that he needs girls to flirt with him to feel validated. - He can be very negative and critical. - He never made me feel very good about myself. - His grammar is shocking. I'm not a grammar snob, but, seriously, you're a ****ing professional, put a little effort in. - I'm not sure how much of a sense of self he really has, and how much he just pretended to have/ took from me. - He can't deal when times get tough. He's weak. - He has ****ed up issues with his family. He's at the developmental stage of about an 8 year old, where he fights reality to idolise them. Jesus, grow up, no ones families are perfect. Get over it and love them anyway instead of trying to delude yourself they don't have faults. Link to post Share on other sites
HeartOfAPhoenix Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 Good post, it really helps moving on when you list the reasons you are better off without your ex. Although,... when you are done listing reasons why you are disgusted with your ex, make a list of the reasons you are disgusted or disappointed with yourself. After you've made the list about yourself start doing things in order to fix what you listed. This post is good for knocking the ex off the pedestal, but you can't change or improve them... only yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
solobeary Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 Good post, it really helps moving on when you list the reasons you are better off without your ex. Although,... when you are done listing reasons why you are disgusted with your ex, make a list of the reasons you are disgusted or disappointed with yourself. After you've made the list about yourself start doing things in order to fix what you listed. This post is good for knocking the ex off the pedestal, but you can't change or improve them... only yourself. Oh god yeah that's so true. In a different situation this post could seem vindictive, but I think a lot of us here are trying to get over the idiolising stage at the moment, and this helps (like you said). And you reminded me of something else to add to my list! - He was perfectly happy to point out my faults, but never recognised his own. - I wanted to encourage each other to become better people. I have growing to do, too. He just wanted to blame me for everything. Link to post Share on other sites
leolove Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 1. Disrespectful 2. Wishy-Washy 3. Stoner(GROSS!) 4. Negative 5. Lacks compassion 6. Selfish 7. NEVER can admit fault/Say sorry 8. Not happy with his life 9. Short-tempered 10. Verbally abusive Link to post Share on other sites
Viv Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 -Mother influenced all his decisions (when she turned against me because she didn't want him to leave the country he took her side). -Broke his marriage vows that we'd written together. -Talked badly about me to his friends. -Never stood up for me, or himself. -Obsessed with having money. -Wouldn't give to charity. -Treated women like they're interchangeable. -No back bone. -Has some really negative, judgmental friends. -Insecure. -Obsessed with being the 'nice guy'/'easy-going', but it's all a facade. -Made me feel like I wasn't good enough. -Sulky, but would never tell me what was wrong. -Selfish (gave me no warning there was anything wrong, was all about making sure he was OK) -Manipulative. -Controlling. -Superficial. All the men seen to be really similar! Something to watch out for next time... Link to post Share on other sites
Buttercup84 Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 But I wonder : Are they like this just with us or will they be the same with a new person ? I can only hope that he stays that way and I find someone much better. Link to post Share on other sites
Mel2011 Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 Liar Selfish I was last on his list No sense of humour Never said thank you All he ever talked about was work Would always pick his nose (vomit!!) Wasnt interested in communicating with me Was an ******* to his mum Thought he was better than everyone else Ungrateful Has his head stuck up his own ass Wait, remind me why I ever dated this jerk?? Link to post Share on other sites
HeartOfAPhoenix Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 But I wonder : Are they like this just with us or will they be the same with a new person ? I can only hope that he stays that way and I find someone much better. If he broke up with you then when will his whole world stop for him to analyse his flaws and fix them??? Not saying that he won't change at all but he won't take the time to fix anything because he is the dumper. One advantage dumpees have over dumpers I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
Buttercup84 Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 Good point he seems to jump from relationship to relationship.He has never really been alone for long. I have learned a lot and am changing things I do not like about myself and making myself better on the inside and outside. Link to post Share on other sites
solobeary Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 But I wonder : Are they like this just with us or will they be the same with a new person ? I can only hope that he stays that way and I find someone much better. Thank you for saying this . I think about this quite a lot, but am usually to embarrassed to admit it. He is so much more ****ed up than me, took advantage of me, hurt me so much, and even towards the end started resenting my sucess at work. He won't admit to his problems, when I was prepared to face up to mine to try and grow as people and make the relationship work. I have this horrible feeling that he's going to meet someone who puts up with all his **** and lets him walk all over them, or just fluke someone truly fantastic and somehow change for them, and I'm going to be alone for a really, really long time. I know it's pointless to think about, but I can't help it sometimes... Link to post Share on other sites
SillyS Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 1. He was so critical of everyone around him. Practically made me hate everyone in his life. 2. He's incapable of seeing things from anyone else's perspective. Always the victim, always the one that is wronged. 3. Incapable of handling stress at all. 4. No backbone at all. So quick to agree with me on certain decisions, just to say that was never what he wanted months later. 5. Needy. God forbid I couldn't answer my phone 10 seconds after he reaches out. 6. So suspicious. Couldn't just be his girlfriend, I had to be an evil bitch that wanted his money and to change him. 7. So lazy. Always taking about the things he needs and wants to do, but doesn't do anything to achieve these things. 8. And even after accepting all of these things, he still dumped like a piece of trash and feels no remorse or guilt for his behavior. 9. Sent me a message yesterday, "I got new couches yesterday, so that's taken care of. Just thought you would like to know". Seriously?! Link to post Share on other sites
NursingGirl Posted August 25, 2011 Share Posted August 25, 2011 1. He was so critical of everyone around him. Practically made me hate everyone in his life. 2. He's incapable of seeing things from anyone else's perspective. Always the victim, always the one that is wronged. 3. Incapable of handling stress at all. 4. No backbone at all. So quick to agree with me on certain decisions, just to say that was never what he wanted months later. 5. Needy. God forbid I couldn't answer my phone 10 seconds after he reaches out. 6. So suspicious. Couldn't just be his girlfriend, I had to be an evil bitch that wanted his money and to change him. 7. So lazy. Always taking about the things he needs and wants to do, but doesn't do anything to achieve these things. 8. And even after accepting all of these things, he still dumped like a piece of trash and feels no remorse or guilt for his behavior. 9. Sent me a message yesterday, "I got new couches yesterday, so that's taken care of. Just thought you would like to know". Seriously?! Oh God...sounds like mine! I have got to stop raising a son and switch to having a partner. Link to post Share on other sites
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