Once I get it, I don't want it anymore..

[Woggle]

Feminism has a bad image because of the misandrists who have hijacked the debate but even I don't think Mme is anti-male. I just wish that women would at least attempt to see the other side of things. If we ever want to really heal this hatred between the genders and I hope most people do then both sides need to be looked at. Men like the OP leave a bunch of wreckage in women's lives but at the same time there are women who leave wreckage in men's lives and I think some of the resentment comes from the way only one side is looked at.

[2sunny]

Ok so I have a question then. I had a date planned with a lovely woman this past weekend. We planned it a week in advance for the movies. Cool, knew how much money to keep on the side. The day of, she changes her mind and says she wants to go a place more social. She wanted to go for drinks AND ice cream AND coffee AND dinner. What the **** trick? What did I do? Told her I couldn't come out to see her due to something popping up. She was cool about it, and she still talks to me..but the question here is, was I being cheap? I don't think so. What's the deal with women trying to see how much we will spend? I don't get it. They'll say "Money isn't important to me." but the second you don't want to spend an excessive amount of money on them they call you a cheapo.

 

just say NO! THAT is honest. tell her - i want to see you - but i invited you to do __________ and now you're changing the plan.

 

tell her adding stuff to the agenda isn't gonna work unless SHE intends to pay for the changes she plans.

 

it also may be her way of seeing how much you're willing to "put out" (of your wallet) in order for HER to put out...

 

for what its worth - i hate those tests some women do.

 

if you only want sex = simply tell her that... stop pretending you want to date if you only want the sex.

[Elysian Powder]

Maybe in your family Dasein, but in general, children of the 80s and 90s have been spoiled on both sides of the coin.

 

Explain? From age 4 to age 17 I basically wore the same clothes. I had to walk to my school which was pretty far. I had to eat at my grandma's and she was cheaper than uncle scrooge. My school books were borrowed, we didn't own a TV. Every time my uncle gave me 10 dollars he vocalized how much my parents and I ''would starve'' if he wasn't helping us out.

 

Add to that the thousands spent to take care of a sick family member. A health condition that caused me a crap load of pain - and the doctors wouldn't fix it because of my lack of money.

 

Compare that to the girls my age at the time. Mommy and daddy spending hundreds on clothes for little princess to not feel that Jennifer is prettier than her. Another legion of girls on the beauty salon each week.

 

Mommy and daddy taking them to holiday on foreign Countries. To me, walking to downtown could be considered an holiday.

 

Raining in pots and some girl's father taking her and all of her girlfriends in the car. Me? The kid this man has known all of his life? I had to walk to school. Got hit by a car and I caught pneumonia.

 

As soon as I return to school all I hear in the form of complains from the girls is how Mary's performance at plucking their vaginal hair is lacking. How's that for a good return to school. I almost died and the chicks are waxing their vaginae, yeah, I sure as hell was spoiled.

 

So spoiled that every time I had a little cash I gave it to my parents.

 

Even in this economy I know of families owing money for food, but they'll always spend hundreds per month on little princess.

 

Of course when she breaks a nail she's a victim of society, comparable to me being sent to war to die so that she can mentally compete with the celebrities at who is the most ''fashionable' head of hot air.

 

Young men today aren't exactly pillars of maturity any more then young women are.

 

Trying to shift ''blame'', are we?

 

Women might express this immaturity differently, that I would agree with. But I see so many examples of men well into their 20s that sit around playing video games and downloading internet porn

.

 

First of all, plenty of women play video games. They tend to differ from the gaming guys because they completely suck at the games they play, and their streams are created to gain them attention.

 

Another point is that many of the guys who play video games are making a load of money from it. That changes things a little, doesn't it? Funny that women don't say that football or basketball is immature or 'it's for kids', but when it comes to video games, the guy who plays is a Peter Pan.

 

Hey, you think that Fatal1ty, the man who dropped out of college to make around 2 millions dollars a year hears from his girlfriend how immature and childish he is? How about tony hawk? Bloke is pushing on his late 40's and spends his entire time on a skate and on his gaming company.

 

Guys. Really. He ain't immature. He got a rolex on his arm and several mansions to prove that his extremely high level of maturity cannot be removed by a video game!

 

Totally awesome!

 

Cristiano Ronaldo is dumb as feck, has no education, is from a poor background, and spends his entire time kicking a leather ball; you think women fill relationship forums with threads informing us young blokes that we should turn to the medical field, and work hard on our dreams to becoming astronauts?

 

Ahaha, I have never seen a woman trying to put ''sense'' on a sportsman's head, despite the fact that kids play the ''profession'' of the sportsman's.

 

Give me a break. In South Korea, there's a professional league of a video game called starcraft. They literally live in gaming houses, practicing to participate on world wide tournaments, traveling freely to so many Countries. Some of the better players can afford living on their own - buying 100% a spacious home - with the money they get from tournaments. They're also sponsored by Nvidia, Radeon, and by many other trademarks which increase their revenues by a lot.

 

In Sweden, the major e-sport( when a video game is now profitable) is called Counter-strike 1.6. The greatest team of this sport is/was managed by a man in his 30's who had spent a lot of time playing on a professional level before turning to the coaching world. This team is legendary because it's lineups have always been comprised of the best players in the world.

 

In 2005, this team won 3 of the major tournaments for this e-sport, earning an excess of 1 million dollars. 5 young kids under the age of 20 going home with a crap load of money, a lot of sex from groupies, and fame and glory.

 

Just a month ago a 16 year old kid earned 100.000 dollars by playing a video game, and he had the opportunity to meet(and compete) the best players of his e-sport. There's a camaraderie between the players that women can never understand. In 2 months from now the 1st prize of the major tournament from that e-sport?

 

5 million dollars, divided by 5 players, roughly 1 million plus bonus, plus wages, plus the sex they're gonna get from horny groupies.

 

Somehow, the majority of the players of any competitive video game have girlfriends, are encouraged by them, and aren't nagged 24/7 about how immature they are, especially since most of these guys hold jobs and go to college, in many cases paying their studies with the money they earn via playing games, and helping out their parents.

 

Geez, how can men be this immature?

 

Any activity that doesn't encompass spending money on women, that prevents us from making money that is to be later spent on money, and if we are busy with something thus the women aren't receiving male attention = the activity is immoral/childish/infantile, and all contact with it must be ceased at once if the guy(s) want a shot at our vaginae!

 

Here's the thing. We love playing video games. We LOVe competitions. Hell, we'll stay up all night to play an oldie like ultima online and compare macros. We can spend weeks outside a street waiting for that awesome game, sleeping on the ground. We can follow a game for 10 years(duke nuken forever) and many of us will rather look at the cover of a video gaming than looking at a woman. We aren't losers, socially inadequate or bitter regarding women.

 

We are men. Without competition, without the potential to becoming better at something, we'd whither away, and the same spirit that allowed us to bend the world to us would vanish.

 

We love video games to the point of ''indulging'' in them even when there's no money to be earned in them because they aren't supported by the major gaming entities.

 

Tough luck.

 

downloading internet porn.

 

Problem? Most guys don't have that much money to spend and it's impossible for an average guy to get away with women paying dutch, that and the fact that condoms are expensive as hell, the pill fails, child-support for 18 years hurt as hell, porn doesn't give you stds, doesn't expect a ring on her finger, isn't on a quest to get back on her ex, does not cheat, does not expect you to ditch your best friends(since childhood) to spend time with her, the guy ain't pressured to find a good job, a good career, an education that benefits mostly her, and I could continue, but I've already created a huge post concerning the lack of interest young men have in women, and all you did was continuing with the same lament of ''men should connect with real women'' , just another case of a man carrying water on his back whining that no one wants to buy water - don't mind that planet-sized lake of drinkable water sitting right in front of him.

 

NOt exactly the stuff their fathers and grandfathers were made out either.

 

Yeah, I agree. Back then, when their fathers or grandfathers wanted some action, they'd visit these mystical places called brothels. Inside those places women made the men feel good and the men would leave the brothel with most of their wallets still intact. Can't say the same about modern marriage.

 

Nothing creates more sexually starved and poor men, than ''committed relationships''.

 

Hey, wanna make brothels legal again?

 

Something kinda funny about women back in the day. They were feminine , good-looking, thin, sweet natured; they didn't walk around on thongs and G-strings like ALL females do; they married as virgins and they only had 1 sexual partner.

 

Lemme see.

 

We have the women of long ago, working hard since their pre teens years. Knew how to sew. To cook. Knew how to manage an household and it's finances. Didn't walk around with their butts and breasts showing. Didn't lose their virginity at age 14 in exchange of a beer. Did not reach the age of 22 with dozens of sexual partners. Had children in their 20's instead of waiting until their 30's. They chose their men in accordance to how good of a father/husband the guy could be , unlike women nowadays, choosing the bad boy/brad pitt in their teens and 20's, and then a good provider in their 30's.

 

Should I continue? The post is kinda big as it is.

 

I am not saying this to put men down.

 

I know you are not. And not giving free male attention to women, elevates a woman to the same status of victim-hood that the men who took part in the 1st world war had. Totally.

 

Pray tell, how young men live up to their accountability, logic and reality?

 

We aren't getting women pregnant. We aren't getting drunk and stoned(at least not everyday aha). We aren't bothering women. The majority of us will not do any harm to women and most of us actually protect you women and provide the man-power that is necessary to build the houses you live in, the electricity and the water you consume. We create the jobs that allow you to complain about men.

 

Matter of fact, we men have created, improved, dominated, and taught pretty much all of what you see around you. We are the soldiers that keep terrorists from killing you. We are the policemen who protect your dignity. We are the butchers who had to kill innocent lifeforms so that you could eat meat.

 

We died at high sea for you to have fish on your table.

 

Is tha good enough for you? Do I also have to sell my soul for you to be happy? Or no matter what we do, we are still to blame for every imaginary wrong-doing and slight?

 

Can I even talk about this? Won't I be called a macho pig for mentioning that fire was discovered by men?

 

Cause I don't know what world you live in but I don't see a world where men are pillars of strength, accountablity

 

You know. The men here could spend days and days explaining it all to you, but you don't want to understand us or our perception of life. You're simply annoyed at the reality of young men suddenly discovering that doing and being the same that our fathers and grandfathers were, will not result in a lifetime of at least no emotional or sexual aggravation.

 

We know - and that's why women hate porno and video games - that women are too much of a liability and very little joy can come from investing on them.

 

So they do what they think will work. Shaming. Focusing their ''angst'' on stuff they think affect our masculinity.

 

During the 1st world war, women would give white feathers to the men who couldn't go(weren't body able) to war. The whiteness of the feather was a symbol for cowardice.

 

many young men forced their ways into the front line, lest women think ill of them. One of my ancestors received the feather. He looked at it, and laughed. Went back to the mountains and died there as an old man decades and decades past the event.

 

A major big ''fck off' to society and to what that society expected of him.

 

Looking around, almost a 100 years after this declaration of emancipation, I see a bucket load of mountains and the trails are worn out.

 

But what would I know? I'm a logical guy that is going to be called bitter 'cause the truth ain't pretty .

Edited September 8, 2011 by Elysian Powder

[TheBigQuestion]

Going Dutch with women is easy, Elysian Powder. If a socially awkward nerd such as myself did it with multiple women, so can most anyone else.

 

Also, you went way too deep into the whole video game thing. Way to miss the point the lady was trying to make. You think the jerkoffs she was talking about were competitive, professional gamers? I loathe social conventions that turn men into suckers, but you'll need to engage in stronger logical discourse before what you say holds any water.

[Elysian Powder]

Going Dutch with women is easy, Elysian Powder. If a socially awkward nerd such as myself did it with multiple women, so can most anyone else.

 

Also, you went way too deep into the whole video game thing. Way to miss the point the lady was trying to make. You think the jerkoffs she was talking about were competitive, professional gamers? I loathe social conventions that turn men into suckers, but you'll need to engage in stronger logical discourse before what you say holds any water.

 

I'm sorry that you fail to understand what I wrote down. I know that some people need everything detailed as much as possible to understand the post, but I figured that my post was already big enough and sufficiently informative.

 

Maybe next time I'll try to pose as an intellectual. Thanks for the tip!

 

.

Way to miss the point the lady was trying to make. You think the jerkoffs she was talking about were competitive, professional gamers?

 

I'm perfectly aware that the ''jerkoffs'' she was talking about weren't professional gamers. She wants the more moderate flavor. I explained why that ''jerk'' subgroup ain't interested in women, and I went into great detail about the professional side of gaming because women consider every hobby a man takes part in, but doesn't make money from it, to be childish and immature.

 

I was exposing part of her lament on how men ''aren't'' men anymore. They aren't paying her attention or dating her. She could never get a professional player to date her. I've seen many of them, average looking, dating top models.

 

It doesn't have much to my previous post, but I felt like talking about it.

 

I'm kinda curious. What do you mean by in need to speak in stronger logic? Didn't I do just that? motives, causes, and consequences? And why young men are like they are?

 

Do I also need to interview young men? and write a book on it? Maybe work my ass off to get a PhD in Anthropology?

Edited September 8, 2011 by Elysian Powder

[rafallus]

I thought Shaun Dro was good at getting a rise out of people..

 

Mr. Dream has it down to an art.

 

32 pages and counting.

 

MDM perfected art of trolling.

 

One goal can only wish to get into such level of stirring **** up on the internet.

 

Well, in one goal's case at least third party backed up that yes, he is ****ed up like that. Here, for what is worth, we may have a thing fabricated from start to finish.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Elysian Powder:

From age 4 to age 17 I basically wore the same clothes. I had to walk to my school which was pretty far. I had to eat at my grandma's and she was cheaper than uncle scrooge. My school books were borrowed, we didn't own a TV. Every time my uncle gave me 10 dollars he vocalized how much my parents and I ''would starve'' if he wasn't helping us out.

 

Add to that the thousands spent to take care of a sick family member. A health condition that caused me a crap load of pain - and the doctors wouldn't fix it because of my lack of money.

 

Compare that to the girls my age at the time. Mommy and daddy spending hundreds on clothes for little princess to not feel that Jennifer is prettier than her. Another legion of girls on the beauty salon each week.

 

Obviously you didn't/don't have it easy E. I'm sorry you had such a tough up brining with so many responsibilities so young. That's unfair to any child. But what happened in your family, isn't a testiment to what young boys go through in general.

 

I just read a story of a man arrested for keeping his two teenage step daughters captive and fathered children with them. One daughter he killed along with a baby. There was another young girl that was kidnapped and kept captive and bore children to a man as well, Elizabeth Smart. If we are going to use and your special case upbringing to claim that's how most young boys are raised, then we might as well use these stories of these young girls too.

 

Further, my point isn't to debunk the very real fact that young girls are infact spoiled. Personally, I hate going to the salon and seeing some little 10 year old getting highlights. It's one thing for a kid to go to the salon with their mom, it's another for them to be getting a $50 dollar hair fix. But I recognize the problem is both in young boys and young girls in differenet ways. I'm not here to blame just young boys for being spoiled unlike you who seems to think all of womankind is evil.

 

The problem is with both genders and it's usually expressed differently. Take my experience a few weeks ago. I was driving down a residental road, there were 4 teenage boys on bikes and skateboards taking up the entire lane of the road. I slowed down, they looked behind them and kept on skating down the road like they didn't have a care in the world. Not one of them moved over. I rolled down my window and said "Hey fellas, you think you could move over? There are cars trying to get around you." I got answers back such as this:

 

"We're just kids. We just enjoying our last few days of summer."

 

Apparently being a kid today means you can take up the entire road.

 

By now several other cars piled up behind me.

 

When I tried to explain to them that I didn't want to see them get hit, one kid started to talk over me saying "move along, move along', rudely talking louder to talk over me.

 

These kids felt they were entitled to take up space on the road and completely be rude to me, an adult.

 

 

Another point is that many of the guys who play video games are making a load of money from it. That changes things a little, doesn't it? Funny that women don't say that football or basketball is immature or 'it's for kids', but when it comes to video games, the guy who plays is a Peter Pan.

 

I don't know anyone that makes loads of money from gaming. But good for those that do.

 

Sports require physical movement and contribute to ones health. Video games comply more with a more sedatary lifestyle. Although people can have unhealthy interest in sports when it takes up all their time.

 

 

Here's the thing. We love playing video games. We LOVe competitions.

 

I'm not saying that playing video games "sometimes" equals a lack of maturity. But I see a lot of guys waste time on things like video games.

 

We aren't losers, socially inadequate or bitter regarding women

.

 

I never said all that.

 

But again, I see a lack of immaturity in guys and girls today.

 

We are men. Without competition, without the potential to becoming better at something, we'd whither away, and the same spirit that allowed us to bend the world to us would vanish.

 

Competition is great. But men don't whither away from lack of competition. Men whither away from lack of purpose.

 

 

..''men should connect with real women'' , just another case of a man carrying water on his back whining that no one wants to buy water.

 

Men shoud learn to connect with real women. Just as women should learn to connect with men. It makes both men and women better for it. It's not always easy dealing with women. We are complicated creatures. But it's not always easy dealing with men either. Believe me. Men are complicated in different ways from women. But I'm a better woman for going through some trials and learning how to relate to men. But if young boys and men just relate to porn, because it's easier, then they aren't really learning anything about what real women are like.

 

Can I even talk about this? Won't I be called a macho pig for mentioning that fire was discovered by men?

 

No, it doesn't make you a macho pig for mentioning that fire was discovered by man. It would make you a macho pig for claiming men are better then women.

 

Further, fired was discovered by man, but it wasn't discovered by you personally.

[Woggle]

I don't think it is true of all women but I feel yelling hallelujah as loud as I can when read Elysian Powder's post. If more women were worth the effort and a man actually got some real reward for his connecting with a woman more men would do it. Men are very much results oriented people and if something does not produce good results we stop doing it.

[Elysian Powder]

Sports require physical movement and contribute to ones health. Video games comply more with a more sedatary lifestyle. Although people can have unhealthy interest in sports when it takes up all their time.

 

You don't have to be sitting on your couch all day, eating fast-food, to be a successful gamer. You are more likely to find an unhealthy person playing video games, but it's not enough to assume that the people who have a love for video games are, in the major part, unhealthy. Granted, not that many Michael Jordans are earning a living through video games, but the guys and the gals aren't usually on the heavy side and they don't spend all of their time on the computer.

 

You'll find a lot of skinny guys, tho.

I'm not saying that playing video games "sometimes" equals a lack of maturity. But I see a lot of guys waste time on things like video games.

 

I know that I'm going to magnify this to the extreme. Do not take it too much to heart. In China, if you are over the age of 16 and if you spend more than 4 hours on a video game, daily, you are sent to military schools. The whole reasoning behind this?

 

The young men ''are'' addicted. Young guys marching in front of a bunch of communists pretending to be part of democracy, starving and suffering indignities. I suspect that the Chinese would call addiction to a a man enjoying cooking, but it's an example of how little considerations the ''adults'' have for the joys that video games provide.

 

Video games are awesome stress-relievers. You are angry with someone? Put the halo 2 DVD on your computer. You want to play a game of family building?

 

Do you want an adventure game with lots of content? Try Fable III out.

 

For a price of around 60 bucks you can be a dashing pirate, a soldier from the 24 century, a scientist stuck in Siberia.

 

These guys work hard and study hard. Don't they deserve entertainment?

But again, I see a lack of immaturity in guys and girls today.

 

Probably. But it's not the video gaming industry the cause of it. Hundreds of years ago this planet's young people were immature. Don't know how immature they were, but all young cubs ''misbehave''.

 

Who's not to say that in the year 1690 some guy was complaining to an assembly about the negative '''influence'' chess has on young people.

Men shoud learn to connect with real women. Just as women should learn to connect with men. It makes both men and women better for it.

 

How does it make it so? Why do we have to be in relationships or interacting romantically or platonic-ally with the opposite sex?

 

Why can't we focus on ourselves instead of putting effort and investment on a relationship with the opposite sex? How can we be truly independent when only the Buddhist Monks and the Christian monks and nuns are strong models of finding everything that we need in oneself?

 

Why can't we dedicate our lives to a greater accomplishment. Anyone can create a child. Not that many can write a Tale of 2 Cities or the last supper. Why shouldn't a man or a woman work at doing that, and surpassing it?

 

What's wrong with people not wanting to stay stuck in social establishments?

 

Why the obsession with attachments?

 

Why do people assume that a guy is gay/has low self-esteem/hates women/is bitter/ if he's not interested in dating? Why can't a guy just do his thing without being vilified and incorporated in the mass psyche as a creepy guy/anti-social kid from down the block.

 

It's not always easy dealing with women. We are complicated creatures. But it's not always easy dealing with men either. Believe me.

 

Yes, that is indeed quite truthful, and life is already hard and complicated. Dealing with the opposite sex creates stress; stress leads to baldness, and I don't want to end up like the rest of the guys I see, those who are ''real'' men.

 

I honestly enjoy having hair

 

But if young boys and men just relate to porn, because it's easier, then they aren't really learning anything about what real women are like.

 

This is not about learning what real women are like. We're simply not interested in the aggravation that comes to a man when he bothers with women. You have no idea how exhilarating it is to look at the older blokes, observing how their health is falling due to stress, and you are there.

 

Listening to how they have a highly valued degree but don't have that much pocket money because he 's married. You nod to the guy and internally smile because you work much less but you possess much more money.

 

You meet up with a good friend and the poor bloke is in a frenzy of worry, killing his heart softly and slowly because his girlfriend is 2 weeks late on her period and he still has most of his college debt to pay for.

 

Or how you know that your best friend has his girlfriend spending time in those ''all girls nights'', then calls you to inform that he magically caught herpes and due to his emotional attachment refuses to put 2 and 2 together.

 

A std that will last for a lifetime.

 

One of my favorites downgrades for caring for the opposite sex is how most women are obsessed with their figure prior to finding a steady mate, but all of a sudden they ''have'' health problems and that sweet body is now flabby and oily. Can you believe how many fit guys I see with obese women. Those guys are bloody courageous!

 

Anyway. The whole crux of the situation is that real women and getting to know them is usually en-globed in a gigantic mass of a lot of problems, obligations, and responsibilities.

 

We don't want anything to do with that. We aren't creating excuses to keep us from connecting with ''real women''. We aren't afraid of ''manning-up''. We aren't bitter, and we aren't(most of us are not)addicted to porn or video games or college football.

 

The price for something that is unreliable, unstable, and problem-riddled is to high, and the consequences are just too ever-present in a man's life.

 

You're right. I'm not the man who discovered fire. But I'm the man, and one of the many, many, many young men, who are turning away from the slaving system, and from one of it's main attractors(women), and we are going to create a beautiful future.

Edited September 8, 2011 by Elysian Powder

[sally4sara]

I don't know what it takes for a kid who lived a hard childhood and grows to resent kids who did not have it rough, to become bothered by the privilege of one gender over the other. It was no picnic for me growing up. My family was not the spoiling kind. On top of that my mother practically jizzed herself any time my brother "accomplished" something like not wetting the bed at age 10 or dressing himself. However, being a parent to me was such a burden that I deserved be knocked around just for breathing near her on many occasions. It would make sense if I resented spoiled boys more than spoiled girls. However I can't recall feeling more angst over spoiled boys than I felt for spoiled girls. I also didn't feel more angst over spoiled girls than I felt for spoiled boys. I guess it creates questions in my mind about what more it would have taken for my mind to warp against one gender over the other when it was only my family and my circumstances that caused my childhood experience and not any of the better off or coddled kids I knew. They might have annoyed me sometimes but I was pretty aware they were blameless to my situation.

 

Elysian, did you grow up as the only boy in a family that spoiled girls? It was hard to discern if that was part of what you were recalling about the guy taking his daughter and her friends to school. Was that a family member or just a neighbor?

 

PS, wow! never even overheard a conversation about pubic hair plucking in school or ever. Was that just hyperbole? It was hard to tell.

 

But in the end I don't clearly see how it all ties into the thread topic. I admit I've stopped following along much, but its kind of a big leap. Has the argument changed from jackoffs like the OP doing the women he dates a favor back to the original attitude he had before folks panned it of women who are sexual deserve to be punished (because some were spoiled as children)? I'm trying to understand your point and I'm not seeing it well because I've known some seriously spoiled boys in my day. How and under what circumstances shall we begin to punish men for the more privileged childhood a portion of them were born into?

 

(Woggle I'm not talking literal here so don't piss yourself over that last sentence. I'm trying to figure out where Elysian is coming from)

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Probably. But it's not the video gaming industry the cause of it. Hundreds of years ago this planet's young people were immature. Don't know how immature they were, but all young cubs ''misbehave''.

 

Hundred's of years ago you were married by the time you were 13 and the little wife was having babies while the little man hoed crops on the farm. have you ever hoed before E? It's not easy.

 

And stop with your "all young cubs "misbehave" silliness. Which is just a thinly covered commentary on "boys will be boys".

 

There are numerous reasons why today's young people are immature. And I agree with you that it's not only because of the gaming industry. I understand you didn't like my example. I also understand that not everyone that plays video games is a slacker in life. But I see a lot of young guys waste time on two things. Video games and porn. If it makes you feel better I think too many young girls and women spend time on useless celebrity gossip. If I have to hear about Kim Kadashian anymore in the "news", I am going to pull my hair out. At least Paris Hilton had a sense of humor and didn't take herself seriously. Kim Kadashian is some vapid, soulless wonder.

 

 

How does it make it so? Why do we have to be in relationships or interacting romantically or platonic-ally with the opposite sex?

 

Because learning to relate to people different from yourself makes you a more well rounded individual. There is something to be learned from everyone. That doesn't mean you have to like everyone or be friends with them but people teach each other things. And I know that having an older brother and a father in my life who were both not always easy to deal with (but who I love very much) helped me to relate to men in general and not think about just myself. There wasn't much my Dad and I had in common. So do you know how I learned to relate to him? By finding something to enjoy with him that he liked. Football. He was a big New York Jets fan. Had season tickets. I use to hate it. But as I grew up, I came to appreicate it. We would go to games together and have a good time. I had gone to games since I was 12 into my adulthood with him until he passed But those games where a way for us to bond. And the conversations we could have about the stupid things the Jets where doing was another way to bond. Finding how to relate to him made me a better woman because it helped me to think beyond myself to find something I could build a relationship with concerning my father.

 

Why can't we focus on ourselves instead of putting effort and investment on a relationship with the opposite sex? How can we be truly independent when only the Buddhist Monks and the Christian monks and nuns are strong models of finding everything that we need in oneself?

 

Well, I don't know what Christian Monks you talked to but the general faith of Christianity is not one of finding everying you need within yourself. It's actually the exact opposite.

 

My guess is you're pretty young E. My guess is your in your early 20s? Or even 18/19. You're going to learn that life is much more boring when your a lone island. People are going to disappoint you but the investment and effort in relationships is still priceless. And you'll learn that even when people disappoint you that your own worth isn't tied up in that and still desiring relationships and connections doesn't make you weak.

 

"Independent' is a funny word. Especially in a world where we pride ourselves on our independence. But sometimes our world goes to extremes to prove our independence that we forget that sometimes a little dependence isn't a bad thing. Leaning on each other and helping other people is really what life is about. Everyone needs help sometimes and when another person can help you out, that's not a bad thing.

 

Why can't we dedicate our lives to a greater accomplishment. Anyone can create a child. Not that many can write a Tale of 2 Cities or the last supper. Why shouldn't a man or a woman work at doing that, and surpassing it?

 

If you got a story under your belt that you want to write, I say go for it. Love, children and accomplishments can coexist. I'm not a Charles Dickens fan myself. (By the way, someone had to have Charles Dickens for him to exsist. ) I personally think the greatest accomplishments in life is love. Romantic..platonic...familia..unselfish love. As mushy as that sounds. And something I still ahve to work on myself to be less selfish. But everything has a place. Without people that push the boundries to write great works, or explore science or find a cure to Aids, we'd be lacking in alot of areas of life. Everything has a place. People are created for different purposes. Not everyone is going to make a great piece of art. And not everyone is going to have kids. But these two different kinds of people purpose isn't less then the other.

 

 

Why do people assume that a guy is gay/has low self-esteem/hates women/is bitter/ if he's not interested in dating? Why can't a guy just do his thing without being vilified and incorporated in the mass psyche as a creepy guy/anti-social kid from down the block.

 

Do people consider you the creepy anti-social kid down the block?

 

I don't think there is anything wrong with not wanting to date or even be mr. social. But it's always good to have a few friends.

[SierraRose]

The ****ed up part is, I can't stop thinking about how sexually loose these women are. Why would I ever date them? Wtf.[/quote

 

These women don't show respect for themselves, so how are you supposed to respect them? It's sad, but there are women out there (and men) who think the way to find a LTR is thru impressive sex. It leaves me to wonder, if they have done this with you, how many others were there before? I hope you used protection.

[mr.dream merchant]

*Yes protection was used

 

Update:

 

The woman who's emotions I hurt actually hit me up saying that despite the bumps in the road, she still wants to remain in contact because, lol oh lord here come the skeptics, the sex was really good for her and that she's been wanting more of it since. What did I respond with? Lol, you all know me by now.

 

OH! And I had a ****ing stalker on POF man! She was really really really pretty in the face, then we exchanged numbers and she sent me a picture. This woman was tall and obese! So after seeing her pictures, I tried to slowly disappear. She would call me, text me, call me, text me, I'd get on POF to check my inbox and ever growing visitor count, she would LOG ON and SEE ME ONLINE then message me like "Ummmm hey why won't you text me back?" I even lied and said that I met another woman. She disappeared for a couple weeks only to message me on POF when she saw me online again lol. So today, I get a text from an unknown number, I reply, and it's a flirty woman. I'm thinking maybe a woman (hot) that I dropped for some small reason. It ended up being her. So I'm sitting home thinking of ways to shake this stalker. She asked me for a picture....and bingo, a light bulb went off in my head. I sent her a picture of my erect penis. She immediately responds back with "Wow you don't even know me and you're sending me pictures like that! Delete my number!" I didn't reply. 30 minutes LATER she texts me saying "Send me a picture of your face!" I'm saying to myself "Wow, what the ****!" I think, and then text her with "Sorry, that picture was meant for someone else." That did the trick. She let off on me lol. "You're a ****ing jerk! Ugh! Lose my number!"

 

AND THAT fellas....is how you lose a stalker.

 

BTW the chick that I blew off has lost interest. I'd imagine so, women hate being rejected even if it's just a cancelled date. Lmfao, women really make dating so complicated over small and trivial ****. So picky and peculiar. I can't say I'm mad, I'm swimming in attention from women of all shapes, sizes, colors, and creeds. She's just one less woman to me right now. I'm sure in the future I'll regret letting her slip away when I hit a drought, which I'm sure is soon to come. That's just how the dice roll when you're a young single male. Gotta get it while the gettins good.