Once I get it, I don't want it anymore..

[dreamingoftigers]

To be honest, I know loads of men like the OP, some are my friends, but if you're a woman and you don't want this to happen to you, you don't put out so quickly. We all know this, so I don't sympathise with any of the women he's used. They knew what they were doing and chose to do it.

 

And I think the OP is morally bankrupt but he gets away with this because he can.

 

Obviously they are naive to expect a follow-up. So either the OP has given them that impression or "they're all psychos."

 

Tells me that he chooses women who are naive, because if they weren't they wouldn't be "smothering" him.

[OnyxSnowfall]

Yes, both genders in the long-term would be healthier if they dud not engage in mass amounts of manipulation and promiscuous sex.

 

agreed...

[2sunny]

seems a bit like Goldpile's posts - after much thought. GP - is that you?

[Ginger Beer]

Obviously they are naive to expect a follow-up. So either the OP has given them that impression or "they're all psychos."

 

Tells me that he chooses women who are naive, because if they weren't they wouldn't be "smothering" him.

 

Sounds like he probably has, or maybe they were happy to have sex and once they realised what was going on they play the victim card?

 

I don't know any of the people personally but everyone is at fault here.

[dreamingoftigers]

Just.....not good all the way around.

 

I have no idea what it would take for me to consider "dropping my panties" on a first time meeting.

 

Me, I'm all about slow passion brewing.

 

I never understood it.

 

Never understood how guys could do it either. Real turn-off actually.

[Ginger Beer]

Just.....not good all the way around.

 

I have no idea what it would take for me to consider "dropping my panties" on a first time meeting.

 

Me, I'm all about slow passion brewing.

 

I never understood it.

 

Never understood how guys could do it either. Real turn-off actually.

 

Agreed.

 

:bunny::bunny: (10 characters)

[torn_curtain]

He is wrong but can we all agree that women would do themselves a huge favor by not rewarding this kind of behavior?

 

Seriously, do you have to apply your twisted logic in every thread. What's the point?

[2sunny]

Seriously, do you have to apply your twisted logic in every thread. What's the point?

 

some of us here enjoy Woggles logic!

 

 

Woggle He is wrong but can we all agree that women would do themselves a huge favor by not rewarding this kind of behavior?

[dasein]

He's not in a gang, dealing drugs, robbing liquor stores, stealing pensions from duped investors, raping women, molesting children, etc. etc., yet by all the fuming and hissing you people do, you would think he was cooking babies in a casserole somewhere.

 

Oh yeah, OP, stop being such a socipath LOL. SOCIOPATH?? do you people even read what you have typed before hitting the submit button? Is "sociopath" the new "fascist" or "hater?" Those were getting played out admittedly, but "sociopath" is just a wee bit of overkill. Now if he were wearing a human skin jacket while screwing these women and keeping them down in the "it puts the lotion" hidey hole in the basement...

 

Or maybe he's a "terrorist" or "Hitler" or a "misogynist" or whatever other hyperbolic nonsense someone can come up with to describe the habit of engaging in consensual NSA sex and wanting nothing more from a partner.

 

Guess what, what he's doing isn't even the equivalent of jaywalking or driving 5 miles over the speed limit, yet many of you post as if you have a bead on Pol Pot or found Qaddafi disguised in a laundromat washing underwear.

 

Let the massive rationalizing begin. No, I don't need to read his other threads, I have already. No, he's not leading these women on, these women are spreading their legs at the drop of a hat, as if they were spring loaded, hell, he probably has to be quick to keep their legs together until they can get to a bed or a car, these gals ain't exactly coy, legs wide open on the hour every hour, 5 billion served under the golden arches or such. No, it has nothing to do with him living at home, his mother or any other ridiculous irrelevant thing.

 

OP, when you are having sex with lots of different people it's natural to get numb to it. If you want to get some of the fire in the belly back, go without for a month or so, you will get the zest back.

[Woggle]

Seriously, do you have to apply your twisted logic in every thread. What's the point?

 

It's not twisted logic. I said he is 100% wrong but men like him would not be able to do what they do if women didn't keep coming back for more. The fact of the matter is that as repugnant as this behavior it works like a charm in attracting the opposite sex.

[Woggle]

I would say the same thing about gold diggers and women who treat men like crap. They wouldn't be able to exist without men who willingly kiss their butts and keep coming back for more. If we want the dating world to be better for the good people then we need to make sure that players, users, gold diggers and any other people that mistreat others end up sad and alone.

[Professor X]

What happened once you woke up from your dream ???

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Ha Prof..my bet is Mommy woke him up for breakfast and sent the little scamp on his way for the day.

 

Woogle, I think we all understand that some women unfortunetly let themselves be treated poorly. But by automatically going to this behavior and saying "oh well women allow this to happen", on a thread started by a *man* (not a woman) who uses women, really is very telling about who you rather focus on. And it's clearly not the person that started the thread.

 

If this thread was started by a woman who was upset about being used and she ended up sleeping with a guy right away instead of waiting to learn more about him, I could understand advising *her* to take better measure next time and talk to her with kindness about why she feels the need to sleep with someone so quickly. However, this thread was started by a man that clearly has a very negative attitude toward women. What is your advice to *him*? Not to all the women you've deemed a certain way that didn't post the thread. By ignoring his behavior as a man, by not talking about his behavior and instead saying things about how some women allow this, you are infact giving him a free pass. What you are basically saying is "boys will be boys and it's a woman's fault". Despite your token "he is wrong comments", you further go on to articulate how you think women are more wrong. Women need to not let men like this get away with that treatment. And men need to call a man like this out for his behavior. Infact, with your line of thinking, I could easily say that he acts this way because men are more interested in patting each other on their back for their sexcapades, then they pat each other on their back for treating women right.

 

Again, we all understand that women make poor choices when it comes to how men can treat them. And that is a issue. But that's not the entire issue. We need to hold men like this accountable for acting less then how a real man should act. And if other men hold this man up to that standard, you're doing all kinds of good things by making men like this live up to a standard of manhood you believe in.

[ThsAmericanLife]

Women need to not let men like this get away with that treatment. And men need to call a man like this out for his behavior. Infact, with your line of thinking, I could easily say that he acts this way because men are more interested in patting each other on their back for their sexcapades, then they pat each other on their back for treating women right.

 

Yep. Exactly. People who behave badly surround themselves with people of either gender who will condone their behavior.

 

For instance... I'm a woman. I've ended friendships with female friends who would not stop cheating on their BF/Husband or with a married man. And I told them why.

 

If they want to change their behavior, I'm there to support them. Otherwise, I don't care to know them.

 

Men need to give more of this 'tough love' to their male acquaintances/friends/relatives who behave badly.

[Mrlonelyone]

To the op. Like my mother says its easier to find a job when you have one.

 

The of woman could sense that another women was present in your life that made her want you more. You became a scarce resource and that raised your value.

 

Enjoy it because like a hurricane it will be pass.

[betterdeal]

Men need to give more of this 'tough love' to their male acquaintances/friends/relatives who behave badly.

 

Not just our male acquaintances/friends/relatives, but the female ones too. In fact, anyone regardless of their gender who hurts people like this on a regular basis will benefit from some moral compasses being shown.

[dreamingoftigers]

Yep. Exactly. People who behave badly surround themselves with people of either gender who will condone their behavior.

 

For instance... I'm a woman. I've ended friendships with female friends who would not stop cheating on their BF/Husband or with a married man. And I told them why.

 

If they want to change their behavior, I'm there to support them. Otherwise, I don't care to know them.

 

Men need to give more of this 'tough love' to their male acquaintances/friends/relatives who behave badly.

 

Just tossed a friendship with a female friend because of this. Found her quite repugnant. Total user.

[Ginger Beer]

Seriously, do you have to apply your twisted logic in every thread. What's the point?

 

???

 

It's not twisted logic. I said he is 100% wrong but men like him would not be able to do what they do if women didn't keep coming back for more. The fact of the matter is that as repugnant as this behavior it works like a charm in attracting the opposite sex.

 

I would say the same thing about gold diggers and women who treat men like crap. They wouldn't be able to exist without men who willingly kiss their butts and keep coming back for more. If we want the dating world to be better for the good people then we need to make sure that players, users, gold diggers and any other people that mistreat others end up sad and alone.

 

Both of these posts are correct. Being how the women are in the OP is like strolling into a bear's cave and then complaining when you get mauled.

 

This also applies to men who get used by gold-diggers. Both 'victims' regardless of gender deserve it for their own naivety and stupidity.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

For instance... I'm a woman. I've ended friendships with female friends who would not stop cheating on their BF/Husband or with a married man. And I told them why.

 

If they want to change their behavior, I'm there to support them. Otherwise, I don't care to know them.

 

Men need to give more of this 'tough love' to their male acquaintances/friends/relatives who behave badly.

 

It's so true. Women need to challenge other women to treat men better and men need to challenge other men to treat women better. Instead of us all stepping back and blaming the other gender and shrugging our shoulders about what our gender does. Things like the "guy code" or "girl code" do not promote better relationships. It just promotes more lying and bitterness between all of us. "What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas", might make good for a promotional commerical tagline for Vegas, but it shows how deeply we sink in our romantic relationships to "get ours" and/or protect our male or girl friends. And at the end of the day, the people who should have our respect and loyatly most, get screwed over for the people who encourage us to indulge and disrespect them.

[Beachgirl8]

My ex had a friend who was a total liar and womanizer, he was constantly cheating on his wife and running games on girls. He would brag about his escapades to my then bf. "I banged this chick in the bathroom at the bar, blah blah" Sadly, my ex seemed IMPRESSED by his friend's sleazeball activities.

I didn't even know this guys wife but I was furious with my ex for even being friends with this jerk. He didn't see what the big deal was, after all it wasn't HIM that was doing it. I could never understand it. If one of my friends started telling me such gross stories I would lose all respect for her and quit being her friend. Not encourage her to hurt people. I wonder if there are any men who would end a friendship over these issues. I'm sure such men exist- but I haven't encountered any thus far. Isn't the saying "bros before hoes"-- omg disgusting!

[bittersweet memories]

here's a news flash for you...

 

any man who's thinking only of HIMSELF while having sex is NEVER a good lay! there's no way to make it good when he's that selfish and self centered.

 

you making it all about you is completely back wards.

 

there's no chance you could possibly be good. that is my experience - and i am not a young gal anymore - but i do know what makes a man a great lover.

 

 

***BINGO****

 

For some reason I invision a walking STD.. Just sayin.

[dreamingoftigers]

Yes totally true. Absolutely.

[dreamingoftigers]

Or when a guy starts yapping about his member or it's size.

 

You just think, "you know, I'm sure it would be fine and all, but you do realize that you aren't the only one with one of those and that they aren't that hard to find."

 

A man should have more then that as his headliner.

[ThsAmericanLife]

Just tossed a friendship with a female friend because of this. Found her quite repugnant. Total user.

 

I'm about to do the same with a woman I'd gotten to know from my ballet class.

 

Despite my advice, she decided to enter into an affair with a co-worker (both of them are married).

 

I found out on Friday that they are planning to go to conferences together. I've tried the 'how would you feel if it were done to you?' and 'if you love your husband, you would stop this ASAP.' Nope. Didn't seem to dent her enthusiasm at all. But we'll see.

 

Was just at their house this morning, and her husband was just so nice. He adores her. He is a very polite and sweet person... and all I can think of is that if I stay friends with her, then basically I'm an accomplice to this BS. They are leaving for a 10 day road trip out of town. I'm hoping she will use this time to reflect on her life and her choices.

[dreamingoftigers]

I have seen often a pattern where those cheating are getting a pretty darn good deal at home with someone really dedicated to their happiness. Then they claim to be smothered or that said partner is selfish. (this doesn't apply 100% obviously)

 

The one who recently went boyfriend shopping had a husband who went to work 2 weeks in 2 weeks out doing a physically demanding job because she said she was tired of him not having "a real job."

 

He had always supported the family and she never held a job longer then 4 months. And the only reason she held that one was because she was working for me. (I would never go through the same set of mistakes).