Once I get it, I don't want it anymore..

[Woggle]

Women are just as bad as men are. I remember working with two women who used to high five each other about their cheating and sadly this is all too common. Some women will defend another woman no matter what and in some cases even cheer it on because it is a woman beating a man at their own game. If women want men to call out other men they need to start calling out women who cheat on and mistreat the men who are faithful and do respect. These men don't deserve it just because they are born with a penis. Women have their own version of bros before hos.

 

I just have a hard time believing all these women would end a friendship over a woman cheating on a man.

 

Not only do some women allow this kind of treatment but they seek out men like this while rejecting men who are faithful and do treat them well. Men do not like to be losers in life and when we see nice and faithful getting stomped on we want to avoid it.

 

Can everybody here at least agree that it is wrong to treat a good, respectful and faithful men like crap and cheat on him?

[Disenchantedly Yours]

My ex had a friend who was a total liar and womanizer, he was constantly cheating on his wife and running games on girls. He would brag about his escapades to my then bf. "I banged this chick in the bathroom at the bar, blah blah" Sadly, my ex seemed IMPRESSED by his friend's sleazeball activities.

I didn't even know this guys wife but I was furious with my ex for even being friends with this jerk. He didn't see what the big deal was, after all it wasn't HIM that was doing it. I could never understand it. If one of my friends started telling me such gross stories I would lose all respect for her and quit being her friend. Not encourage her to hurt people. I wonder if there are any men who would end a friendship over these issues. I'm sure such men exist- but I haven't encountered any thus far. Isn't the saying "bros before hoes"-- omg disgusting!

 

Hence only one reason why he is your ex Beach girl. I dated a man who told me about how him and his father went to a strip club behind his own mother's back because his dad wanted to go. Son and Husband going off to indulge in some strippers over respecting their mother and wife. Strippers +1, woman in your actual family -1. That really got me mad because I knew that sometime in the future, if I stayed with this man, I would be in the same spot he and his father put his mother into. These kind of things are more important then I think we think about. The kind of friends a man has matters. What he does with those friends also matters. How these men treat women they are related to and not related to matters as well.

 

But don't looose hope. There totally are men out there that uphold their friends to a higher degree of behavior. Although, I do admit they seem hard to find, but they are out there. All we can do is hold ourselves and our friends accountable for what we see them doing instead of giving them free passes to disrespect the people they should be respecting most.

[Woggle]

I'm about to do the same with a woman I'd gotten to know from my ballet class.

 

Despite my advice, she decided to enter into an affair with a co-worker (both of them are married).

 

I found out on Friday that they are planning to go to conferences together. I've tried the 'how would you feel if it were done to you?' and 'if you love your husband, you would stop this ASAP.' Nope. Didn't seem to dent her enthusiasm at all. But we'll see.

 

Was just at their house this morning, and her husband was just so nice. He adores her. He is a very polite and sweet person... and all I can think of is that if I stay friends with her, then basically I'm an accomplice to this BS. They are leaving for a 10 day road trip out of town. I'm hoping she will use this time to reflect on her life and her choices.

 

Can you tell me who lives a better life. Her husband or the OP? If he catches her cheating then divorces her and turns into a jerk would you blame him?

 

Men would love to be loving and faithful husbands to women that deserve it but as evidenced by your friend many men like that only get trampled on. What advice would you give to a genuinely good man who is having a hard time finding a good woman?

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Women are just as bad as men are.

 

No one said that women can't behave just as bad as men. But why is this your main point in a thread about a man using women and bragging about his use of such women?

 

Some women will defend another woman no matter what and in some cases even cheer it on because it is a woman beating a man at their own game.

 

Yes, some women will do this. Again, what does this have to do with both men and women holding their own genders more accountable for how they treat the other gender?

 

If women want men to call out other men they need to start calling out women who cheat on and mistreat the men who are faithful and do respect

.

 

Isn't that what we said? Holy Shamolly Batman.

 

I just have a hard time believing all these women would end a friendship over a woman cheating on a man.

 

No one said all women would. Some women have talked about how they have ended a friendship because of such a situation.

 

 

 

Can everybody here at least agree that it is wrong to treat a good, respectful and faithful men like crap and cheat on him?

 

Ironic to me that you are asking such a question about men when this entire thread was about women being treated like crap. Sheesh.

 

I think we all know it's wrong to treat a good, respectful, faithful men like crap and cheat on him. I just want to know why you didn't ask if we could agree that it was wrong to treat a good, respect and faithful man OR woman like crap and cheat on him OR her.

 

 

Men would love to be loving and faithful husbands to women that deserve it but as evidenced by your friend many men like that only get trampled on.

 

Yes, you are right, only men get trambled on. Women don't ever. Just by reason enough alone of being a woman means I never experience romantic pain or hurt. Silly me for thinking I have.

 

What advice would you give to a genuinely good man who is having a hard time finding a good woman?

 

I suggest he start seeing women as people. Not enemies. I'm sure this man is a good one. But he is going to chase away the good woman if he holds onto his hurt and anger with both hands.

[dreamingoftigers]

Good lord, can we all just agree that screwing someone over whether your are male, female, androgynous, or hermaphrodite is repugnant etc. Whether or not the person they are screwing over is male, female, androgynous, hermaphrodite, black, white, gay, straight, Canadian, musically inclined, or artificially inseminated?

 

If you want something from someone, just tell the truth (I.e. This just means tonight and maybe one more time).

 

Otherwise just keep it in your pants or under your skirt or in your armpit (if you are an alien that has genitals in your armpit!)

 

And if you are associated with people that have a low benchmark, either become unassociated, keep super-firm boundaries (you don't want to know about their stupid activities), or just expect them to screw you over one day with some lame justification ("I only slept with your bf for fun, he's so hot! You understand, right?)

 

And truly Woggle, two females brought up turfing a friendship on a thread where the topic isn't even directly related without being directly asked. That should speak for itself.

 

We aren't all out to eat you. Only some of us are. And they are rather apparent, especially with the vision you have been granted, don't you think?

 

Women are just as bad as men are. I remember working with two women who used to high five each other about their cheating and sadly this is all too common. Some women will defend another woman no matter what and in some cases even cheer it on because it is a woman beating a man at their own game. If women want men to call out other men they need to start calling out women who cheat on and mistreat the men who are faithful and do respect. These men don't deserve it just because they are born with a penis. Women have their own version of bros before hos.

 

I just have a hard time believing all these women would end a friendship over a woman cheating on a man.

 

Not only do some women allow this kind of treatment but they seek out men like this while rejecting men who are faithful and do treat them well. Men do not like to be losers in life and when we see nice and faithful getting stomped on we want to avoid it.

 

Can everybody here at least agree that it is wrong to treat a good, respectful and faithful men like crap and cheat on him?

[dreamingoftigers]

Can you tell me who lives a better life. Her husband or the OP? If he catches her cheating then divorces her and turns into a jerk would you blame him?

 

Men would love to be loving and faithful husbands to women that deserve it but as evidenced by your friend many men like that only get trampled on. What advice would you give to a genuinely good man who is having a hard time finding a good woman?

 

Yes I would blame him for turning into a jerk. He gets a pass for a couple weeks of "f you female people," but that's about it.

 

I refuse to allow my husband's actions to provide me with a free ticket to becoming a person of low credibility and integrity. I decide who I am and what I will do tomorrow, not what my husband did yesterday.

 

People get crapped on all the time. People everywhere. Around the world people lose their families and their daughters get sold into prostitution. If we don't grow the Hell up and stop dumping our own emotional garbage on everyone else, nothing will ever ever get better.

[Woggle]

I agree as well but sadly in today's polarized times both genders have taken sides and it only seems to be getting worse.

 

While I don't condone what the OP does many men sympathize with the frustration that drives men to become jerks.

[dreamingoftigers]

I agree as well but sadly in today's polarized times both genders have taken sides and it only seems to be getting worse.

 

While I don't condone what the OP does many men sympathize with the frustration that drives men to become jerks.

 

The problem then is who is in the driver's seat.

 

If let my frustration drive instead or my decency and sense,

I will end up at a totally different destination.

 

And often a destination reached through frustration is NOT where I want to be headed.

Edited August 27, 2011 by dreamingoftigers

[dreamingoftigers]

Furthermore, it sure doesn't sound like OP morgues into his jerk behaviour because his heart and soul were brutally torched by a woman or women.

 

I have never heard him post anything close to that.

 

It seems as though his user behaviour may be helping to foster more man-eating women by logic you have presented. Can you empathize with them?

[Woggle]

I guess you are right. It is just natural to side with your own and when I hear about things involving men I can relate. It is just as natural for you to side with women.

[dreamingoftigers]

In general yes because I have a similar hormonal composition and would have been socialized differently due to our culture and biology.

 

BUT, we all have a much bigger responsibility to look at the big picture.

 

Yes we all have drivers, good sides and bad sides.

 

But encouraging empathy and understanding is a much different thing then encouraging our lowest behaviour.

 

And frankly, some things my gender does as earmarks of our bad behaviour, I cannot personally relate to. Golddigging is one such example. I have never felt the need to and cannot imagine giving up a sexual part of me for the convenience of buying stuff that I don't need. Just seems like a horribly weird way to meet one's needs.

 

Then again, my mother had very heavy views on mixing materialism with sex. To the point where I think that remaining in the lower economic bracket may be more intimate. I can see the skewed logic, but I can see where my brain has adopted and acted out that social perception.

 

Just as I am sure that you would have trouble getting into the mindset of a pedophile, even though the majority of pedophiles are male.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

While I don't condone what the OP does many men sympathize with the frustration that drives men to become jerks.

 

The only thing that eventually makes a man or a woman a jerk has nothing to do with how they were treated and everything to do with their own character.

 

Justifying the people we become because of how other people treat us is lame. It's like saying that we understand why the poor African American young man gets into a gang and kills people because he grew up in the ghetto. When many young African American young men were able to get out of the ghetto and become upstanding men.

 

Men and women don't become jerks because of other people. They become jerks because they've dealt with tough unfair situations poorly.

[dreamingoftigers]

Well there tends to be a combination of:

 

1. History being either too permissive or to strict or completely random which produces the worst dysfunctions.

 

2. Neural functioning.

 

As we get older though, we can make active choices. One thing to remember when it comes to judgment is that we DO NOT start off on the same slate.

 

Character in itself tends to come from a combo of the above two. After the individual is "released" into the world, character is often shaped by experience and our own reaction to it.

 

By encouraging and educating others on standards of character where "everyone wins" more people are likely to.

[Woggle]

I very much do sympathize with people who grow up in the ghetto and resort to crime to survive. Society forces people into corners and then gets mad when they claw their way out any way they know how.

[dreamingoftigers]

The odds in the Southside of Chicago are incredibly poor for those living there.

 

Then again, knowing what I do, I'd just hitchhike my ass out of there and move.

 

But most don't think that way.

[dreamingoftigers]

Woggle is a misogynistic troll who hates women and will justify anything heinous a man does. I feel sorry for him. Ignore him. He's wasted energy to argue with.

 

It works better to argue that when he isn't agreeing with a woman, no?

[dreamingoftigers]

I guess you are right. It is just natural to side with your own and when I hear about things involving men I can relate. It is just as natural for you to side with women.

 

This would be a small example.

[bluenightowl]

Not to mention I ****ed two women within a window of 3-4 hours? That's a milestone for my sex life. Aaah, what am I going to do with myself. The ****ed up part is, I can't stop thinking about how sexually loose these women are. Why would I ever date them? Wtf.

 

The part that's the most interesting to me is your footer talks about the ***** lock, and yet you seem to chase these types of situations.

 

That's a choice that you are making. If you are not into such women you seem to have no trouble having sex with them. Why not spend your time looking for the type of women that you advocate not to search for in your footer.

 

I believe once you are clear of your own values and express that, you will attract women that appeal to those values. In the mean time, aside from fun sex, I think you are wasting your time instead of appealing to the women whom you say you want.

[Woggle]

I think it is pretty clear at this point I am not a troll. I really do think that both genders should treat each other well but I get sick of this argument being so one sided.

[dreamingoftigers]

You know what, just for kicks, create a second ID and go on as a woman advocating the same behaviour you are talking about and you will get a mixed response. Not the Pro-fem, do whatever you want response.

 

I bet my life savings on it.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Woggle is a misogynistic troll who hates women and will justify anything heinous a man does. I feel sorry for him. Ignore him. He's wasted energy to argue with.

 

Hmm, well so far I don't think he sounds misognynistic. But I do sense a bit of escapism and justification for men from his side of it and an unfair balance of requiring more responsiblity of women then he would of men. That doesn't translate to misogny alone. But it does speak of some serious male/female issues.

[betterdeal]

The part that's the most interesting to me is your footer talks about the ***** lock, and yet you seem to chase these types of situations.

 

That's a choice that you are making. If you are not into such women you seem to have no trouble having sex with them. Why not spend your time looking for the type of women that you advocate not to search for in your footer.

 

I believe once you are clear of your own values and express that, you will attract women that appeal to those values. In the mean time, aside from fun sex, I think you are wasting your time instead of appealing to the women whom you say you want.

 

Or just update his signature.

[bluenightowl]

Or just update his signature.

 

Just read Zengirls post and also noticed he hasn't replied in a while. Given the complete flip flop, I don't believe this story is anywhere close to being true or anything else he is writing.

 

Are you a psychology major? Regardless I've learned a lot from the responses.

[Woggle]

Hmm, well so far I don't think he sounds misognynistic. But I do sense a bit of escapism and justification for men from his side of it and an unfair balance of requiring more responsiblity of women then he would of men. That doesn't translate to misogny alone. But it does speak of some serious male/female issues.

 

Maybe because I have experienced it from the female end I tend to have a stronger reaction but I do know that nobody should treat anybody like that.

[dreamingoftigers]

I think it is pretty clear at this point I am not a troll. I really do think that both genders should treat each other well but I get sick of this argument being so one sided.

 

You do realize you are on a thread about a man targeting women for one night shots and then being annoyed by the fact that they ever have the gall to contact him again after he's left that clear impression, right?

 

A thread where he is screwing one girl in the workplace and then another shortly after, right?

 

Herpes probably sent him a "see you soon" Christmas card last year.

 

This thread wasn't titled: "Women use me and dump me, why oh why do women always do this?" followed by a legion of female posters claiming we have some brilliant vagina-monologued reason to do so.

 

This thread was about a guy who gets what he wants out of women and your response directly approached the behaviour of the women.

 

Are they on LS? Is that helping them or the rest of us?

 

The side you are arguing against didn't even show up here. Pretty much everyone agreed that having a grand opening on the first night wasn't a good idea. But clearly he's after women that don't have the smarts or self-respect to know that.

 

Do you know what picking on someone weaker or less bright than you is called?

Bullying or predatory behaviour.