Is it worth another go?

[thatconfusedgirl]

I left my partner this week.

And my reasons were:

He doesn't initiate affection.

He judges me because I smoke occasionally and starts a fight everytime, even when I ask him to be supportive to help me stop he ignores me and argues his point. He lacks empathy.

He says he wants the same things I do; to travel, build a house, get ourselves ready for a family. For example we discussed that if I were to get pregnant we would keep the child and just work it out, but on our first 'scare' he insists that he's not ready and pushes abortion. He says he really wants to save and travel, I've put away a good sum and he hasn't saved a dime.

He is hugely influenced by his peers who handle their girlfriends as if they were meaningless.

I understand that he may not be ready for everything I am and I'm willing to not take things too seriously until he is.

But in order for me to accept that he still wants to be young and party with his friends I need to be able to do the same which for me is spend time with my girlfriends, smoke cigarettes, go dancing. All of which make him feel insecure which results in him taking his frustration out on me (or by kissing another girl) and me being spiteful because I can't have either lifestyle.

He says he knows he could've done more, and wishes he had, he is heartbroken.

I know he has a good heart and good intentions, but his actions don't reflect that. I love him and I miss him, he wants to get back together, but I'm not sure if its wise.

[denise_xo]

I left my partner this week.

And my reasons were:

He doesn't initiate affection.

He judges me because I smoke occasionally and starts a fight everytime, even when I ask him to be supportive to help me stop he ignores me and argues his point. He lacks empathy.

He says he wants the same things I do; to travel, build a house, get ourselves ready for a family. For example we discussed that if I were to get pregnant we would keep the child and just work it out, but on our first 'scare' he insists that he's not ready and pushes abortion. He says he really wants to save and travel, I've put away a good sum and he hasn't saved a dime.

He is hugely influenced by his peers who handle their girlfriends as if they were meaningless.

I understand that he may not be ready for everything I am and I'm willing to not take things too seriously until he is.

But in order for me to accept that he still wants to be young and party with his friends I need to be able to do the same which for me is spend time with my girlfriends, smoke cigarettes, go dancing. All of which make him feel insecure which results in him taking his frustration out on me (or by kissing another girl) and me being spiteful because I can't have either lifestyle.

He says he knows he could've done more, and wishes he had, he is heartbroken.

I know he has a good heart and good intentions, but his actions don't reflect that. I love him and I miss him, he wants to get back together, but I'm not sure if its wise.

 

Enough said. More generally, you just don't sound very compatible. Don't get back with him just because he's good at heart and has good intentions and you miss him. It's not going to cut it in the long run. I wish you the best

[denise_xo]

Having now read your thread on the same topic in the dating section, I say let this one go and move on. Your point d. there would be a deal breaker for me given the context and the duration of your relationship.