Ginger Beer Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Yes, sure. But the main issue is that you think girls in relationships can't go to night clubs, because if they do, they are there to pick up some random guy and cheat on their SO. Same applies to Vegas. I think that just shows *your* lack of trust and not that the girls will actually do anything wrong. And*THAT* for me, is a problem. Or would be if we ever dated. It's not a trust issue, it's a personality/compatibility issue. Why would a girl want to go there knowing full well what happens in those places? It tells me a lot about the girl if her desired destination for 'fun' is a night club. I'm not saying every single girl who goes there goes with the intention of cheating. I'm saying if you want to go to those places, in my humble opinion, you're not ready for a relationship, you are going there for the attention of the opposite sex, in one way or another, which is selfish. There are probably women who go to night clubs and do nothing wrong whatsoever, but the wanting to go there reflects a need for attention which will lead to problems further down in the relationship, even if they don't cheat or dance with other men. Somebody posted in another thread that people are unwilling to compromise in relationships and this is why they fail, I agree. If, hypothetically, I enjoyed going to night clubs (which I don't) and my girlfriend told me she didn't like it, she doesn't like what goes on there and it makes her feel uncomfortable, then I, for her, and because I care about the relationship, would stop going. She isn't telling me what to do and I'm quite within my rights to go there, but loyalty and compromise are far more important than indulging in behaviour which your SO doesn't feel comfortable with. I just don't see why anyone in a relationship needs to go there, knowing what potentially could happen. Yes, your SO could get hit on and cheat on you in a million other places, but why add to the likelihood of it? Link to post Share on other sites
Ginger Beer Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Re: my point about women in relationships going to night clubs being a reflection of their personality and a possible indication of problems down the line in the relationship, you think it's fine for taken women to go to night clubs... I don't enter relationships with MM or guys with GF. Did that once, a long time ago, and it was MORE than enough! ...and you've just admitted in another thread you have in the past slept with a taken man. This proves my point. This debate is over. Link to post Share on other sites
Memphis Raines Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Yes, sure. But the main issue is that you think girls in relationships can't go to night clubs, because if they do, they are there to pick up some random guy and cheat on their SO. you wouldn't go to clubs if there were just women there. Link to post Share on other sites
Memphis Raines Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 It's not a trust issue, it's a personality/compatibility issue. Why would a girl want to go there knowing full well what happens in those places? because those things DO happen in those places. again, they wouldn't go if no men were there at all. and if they aren't going to cheat, then they want to get validated somehow. otherwise, just go to a fellow female's apartment, get some drinks, turn up the stereo and dance. but that wouldn't be any fun without men there would it? Link to post Share on other sites
Memphis Raines Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 ...and you've just admitted in another thread you have in the past slept with a taken man. This proves my point. This debate is over. oops egg, meet face Link to post Share on other sites
wezol Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 (edited) oops egg, meet face Wait, there's more You're missing the point. I *DO* go to dance classes! But I also like to go to clubs and DANCE! I never thought of clubs as a pick up place, even though I'm hit on CONSTANTLY, because I would just never take home a complete stranger! The fact that *YOU* have a twisted idea about what night clubs are for, doesn't mean we all do! You say this ^ So.... Do you remember saying this? THIS! For *ME* dancing isn't innapropriate. As long as there is no kissing and groping, grind all you want, I'll be taking him home, not you! If you're comfortable letting your SO do it, then you're comfortable doing it yourself. Edited September 7, 2011 by wezol Link to post Share on other sites
Memphis Raines Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 "grind all you want" translation: act like you are having sex with me and get your rocks off while I disrespect my SO in the process. Link to post Share on other sites
Ginger Beer Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 I don't think she's gonna reply. Link to post Share on other sites
seibert253 Posted September 8, 2011 Share Posted September 8, 2011 Women and men don't go to dance clubs to interact with their friends and enjoy simple conversation. They go to clubs to shake their things and attract the attention of the opposite sex. I hear alot of women say "well I go because I just like to dance". Again, the premis is attracting attention of the opposite sex. They need to attract a guy in order to dance with him. Now if you're single, no probs. If you're in a committed relationship, and your goal is to attract other dudes or gals, extremely disrespectful to your partner IMO. Link to post Share on other sites
rafallus Posted September 8, 2011 Share Posted September 8, 2011 Ouch. You really owned her. When she didn't bother to reply to my observations + experience of grinding, I knew it's because she knows it's just like I say, but didn't fit to her agenda. Hard to argue with reality anyways. But I'll play a devil's advocate for a minute, and say, that indeed, not everyone goes to clubs just to attract opposite sex. When in college, once I've been out with some buddies at the time. We went to clubs, drank some beers and some dancing. As I was just starting to get any sort of contact with females at the time (at least in "I initiated it" matter), I was very hyper about it, and noticed one of the guys isn't going and just moving around on the side. Told him "let's go get some girls". He told me sth along the lines of: "Nah, I have a gf in my home town, I love her, so I won't put myself out for other girls". So yes, there are people who will not take opportunity to cheat in club, even if they obviously could. Link to post Share on other sites
NervisPervis Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 Yes, it is possible for women to frequent meat markets with no intention of gettin laid. Just like it is possible for a man to frequent a Korean Massage parlor purely to work out the cramps in their calfs. However, BY FAR the intent of going to both places is usually different in a high majorit of instances. Also, if a person goes to either place with less than wholesome intent, they WILL LIE to ther spouse about it. I play the odds. I do not want my wife to go to a place where there is a better than not probability that she is going to play with the boys and lie about it. And don't give me that "trust" crap. There a LOT of failed relationships out there where the end began with blind trust. No-go to meat markets is a SOLID boundry in my relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
NervisPervis Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 And girls night out - Vegas Style! - is the grandaddy of all multi-day, all day, partying with the boys feast of a meat market trip. THE GNO of GNO's. You'd have to be NUTS to let her go. Or even staying with her for CHOOSING to have gone, as I believe was the case here. You did NOT hear about everything that went on. Guaranteed. There were a LOT of lies of omissions when she told you all bout her trip. She DID tell you all about the trip, right? Just ask her: why Vegas? Link to post Share on other sites
Memphis Raines Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 Just ask her: why Vegas? because what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Link to post Share on other sites
yessy21 Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 She will or she wont. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. chill out. have a drink. stop stressing. itll just make u angry and jealous and insecure. Link to post Share on other sites
Memphis Raines Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 She will or she wont. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. chill out. have a drink. stop stressing. itll just make u angry and jealous and insecure. you look really young. you been to Vegas? you do know what alot of intentions are when someone wants to go to Vegas without their SO, don't you? Its not called Sin City for nothing. Link to post Share on other sites
Casablanca Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Who knows whether she will cheat in Vegas, but the taking numbers, getting blotto drunk, asking you to "protect her" from friends' influence (the most telling thing of all), and dancing with strange men aren't good signs. Women of quality simply do not do these things when involved in exclusive relationships that they value, they simply don't. People of quality don't allow themselves to get into risky situations that would turn their SO off or make their SO jealous, they have more empathy and respect for their partner than that. No woman I've ever dated would put up with such behaviors from me while exclusive, not one, yet so many women jump to defend their right to go out to clubs, get sh-tfaced, and dance with strange men, things they absolutely wouldn't allow their BFs to do. Could not agree more....double standards If the lady was only dancing with women that would be fine, but she has a history of grinding with other guys Link to post Share on other sites
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