What is most likely to happen if you tell the woman you are having an affair with her husband?

[Rifka]

Because there was a post about infedelity I began to wonder what would be the reactions and consequenses if a woman was having an affair with a married man who decided to break it off with the mistress, so the mistress got hurt and told the wife...after all, she would have nothing to loose by doing this. Does this happen quite often? or are most mistresses too insecure to act vengeful?

[Tony T]

It is usually the WIFE who finds out and confronts the mistress. Very often the mistress has NO IDEA she is a mistress and thinks her "boyfriend" is just very busy, traveling a lot or otherwise occupied. When she finds out he is married, she is so hurt and humiliated she splits pretty quickly.

 

In the instances where a mistress was crazy enough to let the wife know, very often the wife does not believe her and the husband denies it as well...and life goes on. It really depends on the state of the marriage in general. Now, if the wife has suspected something was going on and a woman comes on the scene to confirm it, almost anything can happen. Your imagination is the limit.

 

Go rent the movie "Fatal Attraction" with Michael Douglas. The movie seemed to put terror in the hearts of most men who had ever considered cheating on their wives. It's a good movie, you will enjoy, and Michael gives me a dime for everyone I recommend it to.

[Rifka]

You really think the wife confronts the mistress that often?In may experience of speaking to married women they usually tell me that if they suspected anything they would rather not no. THis seems rather whimpy to me.

 

I did see Fatal Attraction and loved it. That was an extreme case of pathology though. I'm not talking about someone like the Glenn Close character.

 

In some cultures the wife knows about the mistress and it is accepted. Why does our North American culture make the role of the mistress so taboo?

[billy the kid]

because we or most of us believe in monogamous relationships, esp. if we are married to them.

You really think the wife confronts the mistress that often?In may experience of speaking to married women they usually tell me that if they suspected anything they would rather not no. THis seems rather whimpy to me. I did see Fatal Attraction and loved it. That was an extreme case of pathology though. I'm not talking about someone like the Glenn Close character. In some cultures the wife knows about the mistress and it is accepted. Why does our North American culture make the role of the mistress so taboo?

[Jenna]

Mistresses are also referred to as "home-wreckers"- and this isn't because someone liked the way those words sounded rolling off their tounge. They play an active role in the distruction of a family unit- often times involving children. Not to say that the mistress is completely to blame in any case- we all know it takes two to tango- having said that- I also have to add...it only takes one to say "no." I certainly wouldn't want to wear the mistress badge- any more than I would want to wear the "unfaithful" badge. It's too bad that society has become more "tolerant"

 

of infidelity-- it has become almost acceptable. Our North American culture should find a way to uphold the morals and standards that were present in our grand-parent's day. Although- I suspect that there was some measure of infidelity then too- but at least then it was definately unacceptable- and the mistress was with out a doubt considered "taboo"

 

Jenna

You really think the wife confronts the mistress that often?In may experience of speaking to married women they usually tell me that if they suspected anything they would rather not no. THis seems rather whimpy to me. I did see Fatal Attraction and loved it. That was an extreme case of pathology though. I'm not talking about someone like the Glenn Close character. In some cultures the wife knows about the mistress and it is accepted. Why does our North American culture make the role of the mistress so taboo?