JohnEl Posted August 30, 2011 Share Posted August 30, 2011 I know that its over with me and my ex. its still really hard to accept, even after two months and almost 3 weeks of NC. im still taking it pretty hard. a friend told me toight that my ex is in fact dating the guy that i knew she was "talking" to. she started dating him about 3 days after she broke up with me. we dated for three years, last 6 months being long distance. if you havent read my other threads, heres what happened in a nutshell... about a month left til she moves back and the long distance is over and she meets some new people, one of them being this guy. me and her were having some issues with the relationship and she felt unloved and i felt like she was asking for too much. everything i did was never enough, she always wanted more. i did a lot for her but when i didnt do something, it was a big deal. anyway, we start fighting a lot and eventually the last fight leads to her breaking up with me. after the breakup, she wouldnt talk to me for almost 3 weeks. during that time, she began dating this other guy and kept me thinking that there was still a chance for me and her to work it out. i kept thinking she was going to come back. when we broke up, she kept blamming me for the breakup. she said she was unahppy with how she was "letting" me treat her. she never told me she was unhappy. she never told me she was questioning our relationship. i fell like she was playing the "victim" to feel sorry for herself and to make people feel sorry for her and to justify leaving me for this other guy. i really find it hard to believe that we broke up, after three years, and three days later she suddenly has feelings for this other guy... i think she had an exit plan and waited for the right time to execute it. I hate her so much. she had a boyfriend of three years before she met me. she dumped him for me. now, she dumped me after three years for this new guy. it hurts a lot. i think about her and him having sex and it makes me sick. i feel so alone and shes already with someone else and it makes me really depressed. i want to tell her that i HATE her for what she did to me. i need to find a way to stop thinking about her sleeping with him and i need to stop worrying about who im going to find. im puttiing a lot of pressure on myself to find some one else to fill that void thats now in my life. i feel alone and want someone to be there for me like she was. i have panic attacks when i start to think about how im single and am going to be single for a long time. i dont like being single and i feel like i screwed up somethikng really good. i dont know exactly what happened. i dont know if she was unhapy bc i was treating her bad, or if she just lost that love for me bc of long distance or if she looked at this other guy as something better or if i treated her really bad and she had to leave. i keep trying to figure it all out and i dont know the answer so i just start blamming myself for everything bc thats what she did. she made me feel like a horrible person and made me feel like she was miserable with me and had to "get out" of a bad relationship. but the thing is she never told me that she was unahppy and thinking about leaving. she just left. i know that she loved me alot, so i must have done something to make her fall out of life, right? it really makes me sad that this happened and i really miss her a lot and i miss that comfort of having a girl who is always there. i feel like ill never find it again. can anyone relate? have you felt like your life is over and that you will NEVER find a girl who can love you again? bc thats how i feel right now. its like that was my one chance at having someone who wants to be with me and im going to be alone and single forever. i feel like ill always think about her and how she left me and how im alone and will always dwell on what i "screwed" up with her. as if she was "the one who got away". Link to post Share on other sites
WhoMI Posted August 30, 2011 Share Posted August 30, 2011 JohnE I'm sorry you are going through this. Like ur ex I was asking a lot from my ex probably b/c of the LDR it made me insecure. He eventually broke up with me b/c of something I said & still I dunno wat it was. I understand the feeling that u feel u ruin this "great" relationship but they chose to not work it out with us. I'm sure u did what u could given that u didn't know she was unhappy. Sorry gotta go back to work but I'll be back to finish my thought. Link to post Share on other sites
WhoMI Posted August 30, 2011 Share Posted August 30, 2011 She will probably be a part of ur memory & until then we will all just have to go through this process which hopefully will lead to healing. I know it feels like there's no one else right now but like other ppl advice there will be someone who will love us through good & bad. That's what I keep telling myself over & over again. Just don't give up. Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted August 30, 2011 Share Posted August 30, 2011 Mate, most people go through at least one break up these days, so you're not unique and you almost certainly didn't screw up. Sometimes relationships draw to an end quite naturally. You say you hate being single. Why? Link to post Share on other sites
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