wannabdone Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 Half.... how are you doing, sweet friend??? ~wbd Link to post Share on other sites
Author half_ofa_heart Posted September 9, 2011 Author Share Posted September 9, 2011 Half.... how are you doing, sweet friend??? ~wbd Just got done reading your newest thread (will respond there). He contacted me today with a text "I miss your smile" Of course this sends waves of all kinds of emotions thru my mind. I'm still in the right mindset and forging thru with this being over but I must say... I did respond. I said "you wont while your on vacation. Think of (wife's) smile as hers is the one you'd miss." Do I feel better??? not really!!! we had a few exchanges but I told him I'm moving on and he should do the same. He is where he belongs and we weren't anything to give up a lifetime for. I hope he heard me. Realistically... after all the pain I have sufferred and continue to suffer - it is hard to look at him thru the same eyes. I suppose its better me than his wife. Oh how I wish I would never have allowed myself to enter into this relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
wannabdone Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 Just got done reading your newest thread (will respond there). He contacted me today with a text "I miss your smile" Of course this sends waves of all kinds of emotions thru my mind. I'm still in the right mindset and forging thru with this being over but I must say... I did respond. I said "you wont while your on vacation. Think of (wife's) smile as hers is the one you'd miss." Do I feel better??? not really!!! we had a few exchanges but I told him I'm moving on and he should do the same. He is where he belongs and we weren't anything to give up a lifetime for. I hope he heard me. Realistically... after all the pain I have sufferred and continue to suffer - it is hard to look at him thru the same eyes. I suppose its better me than his wife. Oh how I wish I would never have allowed myself to enter into this relationship. Oh girl!!! I'm so sorry. Its really unfair for him to send you those texts. I know he is trying to reach out because he is feeling the sting, but sometimes when we love someone we have to forego what it is we are wanting and needing at the time to allow them to be able to go on. I know we have said we like to help people so maybe we should look at it like this...... they apparently have a struggle with being with us and knowing they need to be home. Maybe we should help them by not contacting them and not responding to their messages, so they can have the clear path that THEY CHOSE. I know, easier said than done. Right????!!!!! So how often has he been contacting you? Just curious. You have had a lot of pain and suffering that you have and are continuing to deal with. I'm so sorry. I know its painful whether or not we talk or don't. But, I just can't help but to think that him texting you just keeps that pain and hurt a little more up and running than it would be if you were just dealing with the loss of the relationship, itself. You know? Do you think you can tell him that? And do you think you are really ready to totally let him go? As far as the wish we wouldn't have done this.... I'm right there with ya sister. Shoulda, coulda, woulda....right????? Man, what I wouldn't give to go back. I'm struggling with not emailing him back. I know he sounds like a monster, and quite frankly he has been. But, I really do think that as much as he could, he did love me. His sisters have even told me how much he does but he just can't leave. I know he CAN, but I do think he cares for me... just not more than he cares for himself, and not enough. I want to hurt him as bad as he hurt me. Sounds awful, but its the truth. I want to make him feel awful for what he has done to me and I want him to know he has totally lost me. I WANT HIM TO FEEL THE PAIN. Am I wrong????? Link to post Share on other sites
fooled once Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 Okay half, now you did have a set back Why oh why did you respond? Do you plan to respond the next time he sends a message? What reaction were you wanting when you replied? Link to post Share on other sites
Author half_ofa_heart Posted September 10, 2011 Author Share Posted September 10, 2011 Okay half, now you did have a set back Why oh why did you respond? Do you plan to respond the next time he sends a message? What reaction were you wanting when you replied? I know, I know [drooping shoulders] stupid move! I was hoping to piss him off enough to where he will think twice about contacting me again. I'm actually ok. A lot better then I thought I'd be. I'm facing the reality of the situation in that, this relationship will NEVER EVER WORK!!! Thinking anything to the contrary is just delusional!!! We've never been in a real day to day situation coupled with the fact that IF we were ever to get together, he'd have to grieve the loss of his current situation... sooo much in the way of happiness that its not worth all this grief!! Day by day, I'm starting to see things a little more clearly. Link to post Share on other sites
wannabdone Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 I know, I know [drooping shoulders] stupid move! I was hoping to piss him off enough to where he will think twice about contacting me again. I'm actually ok. A lot better then I thought I'd be. I'm facing the reality of the situation in that, this relationship will NEVER EVER WORK!!! Thinking anything to the contrary is just delusional!!! We've never been in a real day to day situation coupled with the fact that IF we were ever to get together, he'd have to grieve the loss of his current situation... sooo much in the way of happiness that its not worth all this grief!! Day by day, I'm starting to see things a little more clearly. You seem to be getting stronger!!! How goes it today? Link to post Share on other sites
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