Can't get over my guy cheating?

[lilmiscassie92]

I apologize if this will be kind of long...

OK so I had dated someone for 9 months, and then I met my new guy probably not even a month later. Meeting him was like a breath of fresh air because he was more fun than my ex (my ex was very possessive and whiny). My best friend had told me, this guy is just what you need right now, just someone to have fun with because you just got out of a relationship. At the time, this guy would drink and be the typical college guy/degenerate. I knew this, so I was hesitant on kissing him. I just hungout with him and after about 2 weeks in, we finally hookedup (not sex). So we weren't official yet, but the following weekend was his birthday and his parents had given him plain tickets out of town to visit his friends in Reno, so this meant a weekend full of partying of course. I would be stupid to not think he didn't hookup with anyone, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt (which I probably shouldn't have). I knew I started to like him more than I should have, and I guess this was my fault because I KNEW he drank and was a degenerate and I shouldn't have thought he would be good bf material. Well that same weekend I had hooked up with someone else too.

 

Then after we had officially called me his girlfriend, I noticed when I start to like a guy I start shying off b/c I want to stop thinking about him. Well after a week in, he made out with another girl at the movies. He had never met her before, but he ran into another friend of his when he was at the movies, and they all went drinking before the movie, and then during the movie he made out with her. He said he never saw her again, but he later added her on facebook and sent her a message saying that what happened was a mistake b/c he was seeing someone. Well, he never told me this until a month later, last December. He told me when I was drunk and I literally ripped him a new *******. I ripped him apart and told him that he should have been more appreciative of me b/c I was probably one of a few girls who would have cared about him b/c any other girl he meets is just some drunken wh*re out at parties. He also has tourette's syndrome, and I never cared I looked past it when others look at him weird when we went out, so it really hurt me that he would do all this to me. When I told my friend this, she said, "Well, you hooked up with 2 other people when you guys weren't official, and when he hooked up with someone in Reno, you obviously can't get mad about that b/c you weren't official." Also, one of the guys I hooked up with, I was "Talking" too and he had asked me to be his girlfriend also.And the day after my guy and I had assumed we were official, (there never really was a TALK about being official either), I was hanging out with that other guy that I was talking to and he gave me a kiss good bye. Well my friend brought all this to my attention that I wasn't perfectly innocent. Well, still.

 

He apologized and asked for another chance. And he said that he did those things because he was drunk, and everytime since we were "assumed" official I didn't want to hangout or go out with him, so he thought that I didn't really care. Also, I was hesitant on kissing him at first and waited like 2 weeks before we even kissed (I turned him down a few times when he tried).

 

Well anyway, I tried to look at both sides of the situation like my friend pointed out, and so I decided to continue hanging with him b/c I liked him. So he completely changed and stopped going out drinking with his degenerate friends. Things were perfect and I lost my virginity to him. I introduced him to my parents, they love him. He gets along with my little cousins. He's been invited to family BBQ's and what not. He brings me stuff when I feel sick. He is with me almost every night. He doesn't judge me when I don't wear makeup etc etc. Everything was fine for the most part until this summer, I found out on his computer that he had been looking at porn and talking to a porn skype girl via webcam and I got hurt and I broke up with him. I know some people wouldn't think porn is a big deal and stuff, but the porno skype girl on webcam, I thought that was a bit over the top. He said he never had cheated on me since that time in the theatre, and he only did this when he was watching porn and thought it was a way to jerk off. He didn't know the girl it was some random spam girl or whatever. I been broken up with him for about the past 2 months and I have been miserable. I don't trust him all over again now. And now this past week he told me that during the same week that he had cheated on me at the movies, he went over to his neighbors house with his brother (his neighbor is this girl and her brother - the girl he hooked up with in Reno) and they were all drinking and they kissed, a peck. And after that he really didn't talk to her and just went back to hangout with everyone else. I flipped out again, I know it was around the time that he was a drunken degenerate and I feel like I shouldn't have been in a relationship with him in the first place around this time. I feel like it's kind of my fault also for being a bitch and not wanting to hangout with him b/c I wanted to keep a distance and not get hurt (i do this for some reason). Well it still bothers me.

 

Also, in December, I was out drinking and called up his brother to come over to my neighbors house to hangout and then I went back to his place and we were cuddling, he tried to kiss me but I didn't. But I told my friend, and then told my boyfriend. So I guess the relationship was a mess the first 2 months lol.

 

He had that girl (the neighbor) text me just the other day, she sounded kind of bitchy, but she was like I'm really sorry I know it sounds weird and I sound like a crazy person for contacting you but I know he cares about you and I just wanted to let you know there were no feelings involved and I don't care for him. On Thanksgiving, it was just a peck, and he stopped me and said I have a girlfriend, and he hasn't really talked to me since then, and we live right next door to each other."

 

I know it happened a long time ago, but now I'm just reliving everything. When I hangout with him and I'm not thinking about all the stuff I'm really happy. He says he's really sorry about what happened and not telling me about the kiss on thanksgiving until now but he just wanted to put everything out in the open. We still hangout and he is bending over backwards trying to make things work. If I was hungry he'd bring me food, or if I was sick or whatever. He'd come visit me. He's been coming over alot the past 2 months but I just don't know what to do. He says he will be here for me no matter how long it takes to gain my trust back and prove that "I'm all he wants". He went to the extreme of throwing out his webcam, deleting skype, deleting any girl out of his phone and off facebook to prove that "You're all I need or want". I feel like what happened back in November wouldn't happen again because he is a different person, but I don't want to be one of those girls who looks stupid to everyone else for staying with a guy. He says he is happy he is a changed person and would never do any of those things again. He says he loves me and thinks I'm the one and blah blah blah.

 

The weird thing is that I was over the incident in the movies. But now when he told me that girl kissed him on thanksgiving or whatever, it like opened up new wounds and now I'm all angry again.

[Baxyaroussy]

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[xotic]

You can't still be fed up with this guy. He sounds like a complete mess and tool. Honestly I can't say I have any respect for you that you are still talking to him...Your 1st b/f must have been really bad if this douchebag you think is better. I would seriously tell him to f off and leave you alone. People who are like him never grow up. I had a b/f who cheated on me twice also...Once is enough and if you go back a second time your asking for problems. Don't make the same mistakes I once did. There are better guys out there then this scumbag.