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How long did you plead/beg/cry, etc with the ex?


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I didn't beg or plead. I met up with him once after he fled. He told me it was over as far as it was concerned, I said I thought it was ridiculous to throw away our marriage and our shared history, when we hadn't even tried counselling.

 

That was all I did.

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She broke up with me while away for the summer working at a summer camp in america (we're scottish), about 6 weeks into we had a big argument, with me hurt that she hadn't been in contact more and after everything was said she ended it. The next day I begged and pleaded over facebook with some very needy words and I finally got form her that "she wanted to see me when she got home but for just now didn't see the point in being togeather, sorry" I took that as a positive and asked her if she was going to see other people, to which she replied no.

 

After that I didn't beg or plead as I thought I'd just try and keep it casual until she was back but about two weeks later she told me that something had just happened between her and another boy from her camp, I was heartbroken and the next day I sent a very dignified message, saying how she was a good person but she wasn't acting like one by doing this, it wasn't right to end something so serious while she was away, caught up in the whole experience ect and she owed it to me to stay faithful at least til she was home so we could talk about this. She didn't reply and so about 3 days later I sent her an unpleasent message basically saying how her family were going to be ashamed of her that she couldn't stay faithful to her bf for a summer, she was letting herself down as a person and I brought up other stuff from her previous relationships. She ignored that mail too and a few days later updated her relationship status to in a relationship with this guy (despite the fact he was going home then, and they would hardly get to see each other when she's back since he's english).

 

So I've not contacted her at all since the 26th of august, or begged since the 21st and have deleted her number and her on facebook. She arrives home tonight, lives round the corner from me and it's going to be a strange feeling knowing she will be so close, as opposed to thousands of miles away.

 

So 18 days of not begging or contacting her at all is pretty good I guess, and I don't intend to contact her when she's at home. This will surely give her the impression I've moved on.

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OMG- i did it for like three weeks. i literally cried, begged, pleaded, sent hundreds of text messages, called hundreds of time, had emotional outbursts, etc. etc. would have done anything!!!

 

i look back and laugh- it really wasnt that serious. he wasnt that serious. after everything he put me through, he should have been BEGGING ME for forgivness, instead i fed into his narcisstic, egotistical ass self... smh, never again!

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I did my "begging" if you will in the week or so leading up to the "breakup" (i.e. him just bailing out without communicating such). Afterward, I did leave him a note saying he could have just told me and I texed after to say I wrote a note (which was stupid). I did the "I'm ok" text a little later and sent 2 that were stupid stuff I probably sent in hopes of a response. So I guess I can say I didn't chase after him hardly at all, instead I cried to everyone else who would listen instead! But I did act the fool during the Pre-breakup.

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I never begged for him back. When he dumped me (via phone),yes I cried a little and stated that I did not want to break up but that I respected his needs, but the months following our breakup I never once begged. He was in my life a lot due to us being in the same social circle, and the only thing I ever asked of him (very politely I might add), was to have a face to face conversation so I could understand and bc we had to see each often so I felt we did need to talk about some boundaries etc. Needless to say, he didnt and still has no empathy, never gave the me the one small thing I asked...and now he has a new gf, and I see him with her..and I just think he is scum. I sure do have regrets, like why did I even bother being mature and respectful to him when he didnt give it back...but hey, when that breakup happens we all lose a little sanity, we def cant fault ourselves for that bc it surely is an emotionally gut wrenching situation!

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I never begged for him back. When he dumped me (via phone),yes I cried a little and stated that I did not want to break up but that I respected his needs, but the months following our breakup I never once begged. He was in my life a lot due to us being in the same social circle, and the only thing I ever asked of him (very politely I might add), was to have a face to face conversation so I could understand and bc we had to see each often so I felt we did need to talk about some boundaries etc. Needless to say, he didnt and still has no empathy, never gave the me the one small thing I asked...and now he has a new gf, and I see him with her..and I just think he is scum. I sure do have regrets, like why did I even bother being mature and respectful to him when he didnt give it back...but hey, when that breakup happens we all lose a little sanity, we def cant fault ourselves for that bc it surely is an emotionally gut wrenching situation!

 

Yeah you did the right thing by respecting his needs. Too bad he couldn't see what a nice/respectful person you were.

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Yeah you did the right thing by respecting his needs. Too bad he couldn't see what a nice/respectful person you were.

 

thanks daisy, that brought a welcomed smile to my face!! Sometimes I am angry that I was so respectful when he didnt deserve it, and the things he has done to me post breakup show his lack of empathy. As angry as I am, it still hurts, esp bc I still see him around with his new gf.

 

Def dont fault yourself for being clingy those first 2 weeks. Honestly, I think when we do go a little nuts, it shows how true our emotions and feelings are. Now..to beg/cry/cling etc for months and become a stalker, hah, that is not too good! To accept it is a good thing, but I think to show some emotion to the dumper...esp right in the beginning..well it shows how human we all are. Hence why ppl suggest the opposite, that whole show the dumper no emotion to get a reaction etc etc bc it is the opposite of what they expect, and although I accepted/respected, I still showed my emotion....Ah if only there was a real manual on this with all the proper "rules" haha :)

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It was about 7 month i beg,cry and even knee down and touch her leg in the open street,but i was failed.If i get some time i wil again do the same.

 

God, and I thought I was bad! Thanks mridul_chajilee that made me laugh out loud! Come on man, chin up, women aren't the be all and end all of life. Find something else to live for boyo.

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