Talk about Chronic Procrastination

[tykira]

Hey there. I've been dealing with chronic procrastination for most of my life now. Because of this, my grades in school have suffered greatly and almost got kicked out of college! I rarely ever exercise, but if I do it's an extremely short session. I don't even do the things I love anymore because I'm too busy taking care of my other obligations, like work.

 

I don't know what else to do. I've read articles about why, how and how to deal with it but that doesn't work. I've looked up vitamins that might help with my focus and concentration, but most of the information I found is just bias opinions. This is seriously destroying my life, and I need help. :-(

 

Anybody have any ideas? Or stories they might want to share here?

[analystfromhell]

Easier said than done of course. I also suffer from chronic procrastination except when I'm up against a deadline so of course I just create a series of little goals and work to do each one that way I feel as though I've accomplished something at each step along the way.

 

It also helps to surround yourself with people who are ambitious and want to get things done so that while you are around them you step up your game.

 

Neither of these address the root cause which is- I have NO IDEA!!!! I wish I knew why I or anyone else does this since it's so self defeating. They are just work arounds which have been marginally effective in my case. Hope they help...

[josie54]

Hey there. I've been dealing with chronic procrastination for most of my life now. Because of this, my grades in school have suffered greatly and almost got kicked out of college! I rarely ever exercise, but if I do it's an extremely short session. I don't even do the things I love anymore because I'm too busy taking care of my other obligations, like work.

 

I don't know what else to do. I've read articles about why, how and how to deal with it but that doesn't work. I've looked up vitamins that might help with my focus and concentration, but most of the information I found is just bias opinions. This is seriously destroying my life, and I need help. :-(

 

Anybody have any ideas? Or stories they might want to share here?

 

You've just described me for most of my life as well (and I'm in my 40's!). I left my papers until the last minute in college--so much so, that one year I had to write five 25-page research papers in a week, and that INCLUDED THE RESEARCH. I think fast and work under pressure fairly well, so I actually got them all done and got good grades on each one. But that kind of thing actually worked against me, because it gave me no reason to change.

 

I followed a similar pattern at work. While I was young and my brain was flexible, I kept up, but barely. Not ot mention that it takes time away from the things I want to do. I've taken work on too many vacations to count--not because I have all that much work, but because I simply did not complete the work I had to do before I left.

 

But then, match procrastination with depression and age and you get a really bad combination. I wasn't able to finish on time like I used to. I was more stressed, and the more I procrastinated, the more stressed and depressed I got. I came "this close" to losing my job over it. That was my last straw. There was no way I was going to get fired just because I couldn't get my butt in the chair and work.

 

So, here's what I've been doing:

 

-I set a timer for a certain period of time. Maybe 15 minutes, maybe a full hour. But I make it fairly short. And I absolutely make myself set that timer and I vow for that short period of time, I will work on whatever it is I must work on until the timer goes off. Most of my procrastination stems from not wanting to tackle whatever big job it is, because I see it as so overwhelming. But when I think of "15 minutes a day" it's not so bad. I can work on anything for 15 minutes a day. Also, after you get going for 15 minutes, you often find yourself on a roll, and you'll keep going for much longer than that. Not always, but often. Do that for 7 or 14 days in a row and usually the project is done.

 

-An extension of the above: I dedicate myself to whatever task I have to finish for very short spans of time each day. I don't want to work 8 hours on anything, but I tell myself I only have to work for 30 minutes on it, twice during the day.

 

-I reward myself when I finish those short work times. Maybe it's a television show, a run, or a trip to a favorite shop. But I make sure there's something good waiting for me once I finish my 15, 30, or 60 minutes' work.

 

-I ask myself the question: Would I rather procrastinate one more day or lose my job? Usually the answer is no, and I'll get moving. For you the question might be "Would I rather procrastine one more day or get kicked out of school?"

 

-This one's going to sound "out there" but it works for me. I close my eyes and I picture the procrastinator inside of me as a completely seperate person. She's telling me that I don't have to do whatever it is, that I should just go take a nap or watch televisions. And I tell her to go away. Just like that. I ask her to please leave the room and go amuse herself for a while, while I attend to whatever it is. I picture her leaving my head. I then invite the more "worker bee" part of me, who likes to get things done, to come and take over. And then, as that part of me, I get to work.

 

One thing I no longer do--I never tell myself I have to sit here until I finish it. Because if I do that, it's almost guaranteed that I'll feel defeated before I even start and just give up and walk away.

 

Just do 15 minutes. That's it. Then reward yourself. Then do another 15 minutes later on. Reward youself again. Start this process early on, before you're right on top of your deadlines.

 

I'm still a procrastinator, but by committing myself to only short bursts of effort and then giving myself a lot of time to rest and enjoy myself, it's given me the ability to actually get stuff done by deadlines.

[Dorie]

Admittedly, I scanned. I did not see A.D.D. mentioned. Have you been screened for it?

[josie54]

I thought the same thing when I read the OP's question. There is a fine line between ADD and procrastination, so it depends on what kind of task avoider the OP is.

 

Tykira, my question to you is CAN you focus if you WANT to? To me that's the distinction. If you can't, no matter how hard you try--if you find yourself distracted when trying to do anything, not just school work--then you definitely might want to get tested for ADD.

 

I have not thought that to be my problem, however. I know people with ADD and they really have a hard time functioning in general and are very disorganized because they lose track of where they are in a task. I have always been very organized, and when I get going, I can focus quite well. And when stuff isn't work related, or if it's something I want to do, I rarely have a problem.

 

My problem is that if I don't want to do something (which, unfortunately, applies to most things), I don't do it. It takes a very strong act of will for me to get started and it can take a long time for me to "latch on" to a task (for lack of a better description), so that I'm on a roll toward finishing it. For a long time, it will be fits and starts as I keep getting up to do something else.

 

That's why I came up with my "15-minute rule." If I come back to something enough times for 15-minute sessions, I'll eventually find my focus and be able to sit with it for a longer period of time to get it done.

 

That said, I do believe I have ADD tendencies (I just don't think I'd ever be diagnosed with it, and there's no point to taking medication since I know I can focus without it if I push myself). But I've just had to work around them.