Cindylu Posted September 14, 2000 Share Posted September 14, 2000 Can someone please give me there opinion. I have fallen hard for a man. I wanted very much to have sex with him. He said wanted it too but when we got together it was not very good. He does not get very hard and he mostly wants to be on the bottom and just lay there and let me do all the work also he rarely comes. I have suspected he might be gay from some of the things he has said but when I asked him he said he wasn't plus he had a wife. but here is the question would a straight man wear reddish bikini underwear with a pink bow and also go to the gay shops to have his private parts waxed? Or maybe I just don't turn him on because he now has another girlfriend but i think he is treating her the same way with indifference. I am very confused because he still wants to be friend. I just want to forget him but for some reason can't and I don't want to spend my time barking up the wrong tree. could he be bi? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted September 14, 2000 Share Posted September 14, 2000 This doesn't sound like anything the average woman would want to touch. If he's got another girlfriend, strike one. If he can't get a proper erection and wants to lay on his butt while you do all the work, strike two. And if he likes to wear reddish bikini underwear with a pink bow and to go gay shops to get his weenie waxed, that's strikes three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine and ten. Did you even have to ask??? Link to post Share on other sites
Paulie Posted September 14, 2000 Share Posted September 14, 2000 What DO you see in this guy? If you married him, and you did the wash from time to time...would you want to have to wash... (excuse me while I vomit) ...those red underwear with the pink bow? I don't know you...but I know you can do better that this person! Link to post Share on other sites
billy the kid Posted September 14, 2000 Share Posted September 14, 2000 Just one question when you saw the red and pink underwear and the limp d/// why the hell didn't you run and I mean fast??? If you married him, and you did the wash from time to time...would you want to have to wash... (excuse me while I vomit) ...those red underwear with the pink bow? I don't know you...but I know you can do better that this person! Link to post Share on other sites
Jenna Posted September 14, 2000 Share Posted September 14, 2000 Girl!! He is GAY!! YOU KNOW IT!! I mean if WE know it- how can you be questioning it?? It is "said" that gay men have an uncanny insight into the way a woman thinks- how she feels- they say things that she wants to hear- give good advice- are there when you need a friend- HELL "I" would want to marry one if it weren't for that ONE LITTLE PROBLEM- a gay man can't do it for me between the sheets- not to mention that HE would probably be picturing Stone Phillip's head on my shoulders the whole time. ( a little humor from Will & Grace) These qualities in him may be what is keeping you in denial. God knows that we wish all men had that kind of sensitivity- until we realize the sacrifice. Anyways- keep him as a friend- he will probably make a good one- but let go of the possibility that you are going to have a romantic future with him- that "AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN" and you CAN NOT change him- no matter how sexy you try to be- gay is gay. Good luck. Jenna If you married him, and you did the wash from time to time...would you want to have to wash... (excuse me while I vomit) ...those red underwear with the pink bow? I don't know you...but I know you can do better that this person! Link to post Share on other sites
Cindylu Posted September 15, 2000 Share Posted September 15, 2000 Girl!! He is GAY!! YOU KNOW IT!! I mean if WE know it- how can you be questioning it?? It is "said" that gay men have an uncanny insight into the way a woman thinks- how she feels- they say things that she wants to hear- give good advice- are there when you need a friend- HELL "I" would want to marry one if it weren't for that ONE LITTLE PROBLEM- a gay man can't do it for me between the sheets- not to mention that HE would probably be picturing Stone Phillip's head on my shoulders the whole time. ( a little humor from Will & Grace) These qualities in him may be what is keeping you in denial. God knows that we wish all men had that kind of sensitivity- until we realize the sacrifice. Anyways- keep him as a friend- he will probably make a good one- but let go of the possibility that you are going to have a romantic future with him- that "AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN" and you CAN NOT change him- no matter how sexy you try to be- gay is gay. Good luck. Jenna Link to post Share on other sites
Cindylu Posted September 15, 2000 Share Posted September 15, 2000 Thanks everyone for your reply. I just fell for a guy who told me and still tells me he is not gay. Why I don't know. But Jenna hit the nail on the head. He knows exactly what I want to hear and is very charming when he wants to be. but like everyone said I really do know the true and thanks for helping me realize the rejection I feel or being rejected was not because of me but because of his sexual orientation. I think it helps me some to know this but I still feel kind of stupid. I realize now I can only be his friend and will have a new mind set..Thanks Cindylu Link to post Share on other sites
Jenna Posted September 15, 2000 Share Posted September 15, 2000 Don't feel stupid- that wasn't what we were trying to get at. We all want the qualities that he was showing you, and we are likely to be in denial about all kinds of things if the person is meeting some of our emotional needs. No one would "want" to except that there was something about their love interest that could not be changed. And almost ALL things -with hard work- can be overcome- except THIS one. It is sad- but unfortunately- it would be like trying to teach you how to be sexually interested in women- it can't be done. You are wise- I can tell- you asked for advice- gave the whole story- even down to the pink bow- and took the advice you had been given. When all the time- you already knew- that's a pretty "smart" girl- not a stupid one. Jenna Thanks everyone for your reply. I just fell for a guy who told me and still tells me he is not gay. Why I don't know. But Jenna hit the nail on the head. He knows exactly what I want to hear and is very charming when he wants to be. but like everyone said I really do know the true and thanks for helping me realize the rejection I feel or being rejected was not because of me but because of his sexual orientation. I think it helps me some to know this but I still feel kind of stupid. I realize now I can only be his friend and will have a new mind set..Thanks Cindylu Link to post Share on other sites
Deejette Posted September 15, 2000 Share Posted September 15, 2000 My sister keeps falling for gay men and gettin her heart broken. A woman needs to feel desired sexually and one of the men she was seeing actually said to her, "I don't go fishing down there!" This did a number on her self-esteem and no woman needs that. Women need to feel that they are attractive to the man they are "with." Over time it can do real harm to feel that no matter what, he prefers men and has actual distaste for women. Don't feel stupid- that wasn't what we were trying to get at. We all want the qualities that he was showing you, and we are likely to be in denial about all kinds of things if the person is meeting some of our emotional needs. No one would "want" to except that there was something about their love interest that could not be changed. And almost ALL things -with hard work- can be overcome- except THIS one. It is sad- but unfortunately- it would be like trying to teach you how to be sexually interested in women- it can't be done. You are wise- I can tell- you asked for advice- gave the whole story- even down to the pink bow- and took the advice you had been given. When all the time- you already knew- that's a pretty "smart" girl- not a stupid one. Jenna Link to post Share on other sites
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