bestof Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 Hi everyone. I'm engaged and my man is in the military. We have been a long distance couple for the last 8 months. I'm finishing up my last year of school. I heard from him recently that there isn't any work out there for me where he lives and that he would be deployed in our time together. I don't know what to do because having a career is very important to me. I also have doubts about our compatibility. I love him so much but I don't know if he is the right one for me or if I can continue to withstand the long distance. I'm afraid of losing the best man I've ever met but at the same time I am very young. I don't think I've ever been this upset. Any thoughts would be appreciated. Please don't be rude. Thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
madjac74 Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 Hi everyone. I'm engaged and my man is in the military. We have been a long distance couple for the last 8 months. I'm finishing up my last year of school. I heard from him recently that there isn't any work out there for me where he lives and that he would be deployed in our time together. I don't know what to do because having a career is very important to me. I also have doubts about our compatibility. I love him so much but I don't know if he is the right one for me or if I can continue to withstand the long distance. I'm afraid of losing the best man I've ever met but at the same time I am very young. I don't think I've ever been this upset. Any thoughts would be appreciated. Please don't be rude. Thank you. Sorry for your difficulties. The one thing that holds any relationship together especially long distance ones is the belief that they are "the one". If not for that then we would just find something closer and more convenient. You really don't put up with an LDR if they aren't the most incredibly special person to you and one you don't think you will ever find again. And like you said you are very young so you probably do not know what the best man is for you. Thats why I dont believe in all these college LDR's. Why do you think you guys aren't compatible? Link to post Share on other sites
Author bestof Posted September 13, 2011 Author Share Posted September 13, 2011 Thanks for your response. Well I felt right away that he was the one but as time went on I started to question it as the 'honeymoon' stage faded. We hit it off right away but I realized that he does not stimulate me intellectually. I don't mean that he is unintelligent but maybe we just are not as compatible in that way. I feel very stimulated by friends as we challenge each other's opinions playfully. But with my fiance I feel like we agree too much and there's nothing exciting about that. He doesn't bounce off of my ideas like others. Also we have trouble with our physical relationship. Mostly, I feel like it is hard to work on the relationship when in a LDR. Why do you not believe in college LDRs? Is it based on your experiences? It's true that I haven't dated a lot of people, but I really feel like I can never find someone this wonderful again. Link to post Share on other sites
madjac74 Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 Thanks for your response. Well I felt right away that he was the one but as time went on I started to question it as the 'honeymoon' stage faded. We hit it off right away but I realized that he does not stimulate me intellectually. I don't mean that he is unintelligent but maybe we just are not as compatible in that way. I feel very stimulated by friends as we challenge each other's opinions playfully. But with my fiance I feel like we agree too much and there's nothing exciting about that. He doesn't bounce off of my ideas like others. OMG I know exactly what you mean. I get so tired of being with girls who just giggle and agree when I bring up some random topic that I would expect some interesting convo on. That is why I am so crazy about my SO because she challenges me and vice versa. We can have text conversations that last days. Why do you not believe in college LDRs? Is it based on your experiences? It's true that I haven't dated a lot of people, but I really feel like I can never find someone this wonderful again. It is based on experiences and from what I read on here. It just seems that is a phase where life is just a big learning and expirement phase and you are meeting so many different people. I can't imagine trying to carry on a relationship at this time in life especially a long distance one where you are at different colleges. Link to post Share on other sites
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