My mom won't let me get on the pill.

[Doo]

I am almost 15 years old, and I have moderate acne. I went to the dermatologist and she suggested two things for me to help clear it up: Retin-A or a birth-control pill. I tried Retin-A for a while, and it messed my face up. It made my face extremely red and peely; I know that is what Retin-A does at first, but I have sensitive skin and think that Retin-A is too harsh for it.

 

I am now asking my mom if I could go on the pill, and she says it is absolutely out of the question. She says, "I will NOT allow my 14 year old daughter to be on the birth control pill." I don't understand WHY exactly. It is not like I am going to go off and have sex just because I am on the pill. I think she is being ignorant. Many girls I know have gone on the pill for their acne and said it did wonders for their skin. I want to be on the pill, too.

 

Why is my mom being so foolish, and what can I do to get it...or get her to let me get it?

[uriel]

Doo,

 

I'm afraid I agree with your mom. Her concern is reasonable. Being on the pill does reduce your resistance to having sex without protection. You might not think so right now, but if you met the right guy and found yourself in the right circumstances with him... I'm just saying -- you never know what will happen. Your mother has to be the one to be cautious about any eventuality. Trust her on this one, even if you think she's being an alarmist and just not trusting you as she should.

 

There are lots of other alternative treatments for acne. Ask your dermatologist for them and start trying them out.

 

-- uriel

[RavenBanshee]

Hi,

I know you want your acne to go away. Unfortunatley the pill does not always work. Some mom's feel like putting their daughter on it, for whatever reason, gives them permission to have sex. Also, the pill can screw up your menstrual cycle and make you gain weight. If you really want to be on the pill, you can go to Planned parenthood, but you need to have gynecology exam. From there you can by the pill low cost, without parent permission. Please keep in mind, your mom wants the best for you and she's probably had her own experiences with the pill. Have you tried other prescriptions for your acne?

[XxGGNO1FANxX]

i think if you want to you should be able to make your own desision you sound sensible enough.

if you want to have sex you will do it anyway

i went on pill at 13 but for protection.

you can get the pill from clinics without parental permission

[msrealdoll]

Teens shouldn't use the pill alone when having sex-there's no protection from STDs with it.

 

Try talking to your mom, being completely honest. Tell her that if you want to have sex, that you can regardless of whether you're on the pill. Perhaps you could tell her that you understand that the best course of action is abstinence, and that should you choose to have sex, you would use a condom.

 

Your mom may be having a difficult time accepting that you're growing up. Some parents feel like if they give their permission for girls to go on the pill, they are condoning teen sex. She needs to understand that you know she doesn't want you to have sex, and that you plan to take her wishes into account before making a decision like that.

 

My daughter and I had a very open relationship when she was your age. She went on the pill at 15 because her gynecologist recommended it. I was very upset; I felt like if she went on the pill, she wouldn't use condoms if she chose to have sex. Her gynecologist told me that while the odds of her contracting an STD were fairly low, the chance of her becoming pregnant was very high.

 

She made it through her teens without getting pregnant or an STD. She recently told me (she's 24 now) that she felt like our relationship being open made her feel like she had more say in sexual matters, and that she made better choices because of it. She feels that my treating her like an adult made her act more like one.

 

Oh, her skin cleared up a lot after she went on the pill.

[Good2Go]

If Iwere you, I'd go to a dermatologyst not a gynocologist. They have an ample amount of meds and treatments for acne which are far safer than taking the pill.

[CurlyIam]

There are lots and lots of treatments beside the pill.

 

I wouln not recommend the pill, not even in order to evoid unwanted pregnancies, because it messes up your body - the hormones. I am on the pill for I am in a serious exclusive relationship, for it is easy (my sister blames me for it) and because I seem to be oversensitive - sometimes allergic to lubrifiants on the condom.

 

And the side effects can be horrible. For instance, it may induce mild feeling of depression. What if you have your exams? What if it affects you in a moment that will change forever the rest of your life? It may appear like an easy way out. It's not!

 

 

I understand that having acneea may create you some complexes of inferiority, but before making such a big decision, for it is a big big decision, be sure to consider all your options, not only the easiest.

[einahpets]

i can't believe the way doctors these days (it seems with out second thought) feel the solution to everything is through pills. our society as a whole is overmedicated. there are many instances where meds are needed, but not every child needs to be on ritalin and not everyone with acne needs to be on birth control. birth control is meant for the use of preventing pregnany, not acne. it irritates me that doctors feel the need to push medications on their patients, especially considering she is your dermatologist- not your gynocolgist.

 

honey, i know acne sucks. but unless you are in a sexual relationship you shouldn't be on birth control. i have been on many different kinds before and i had to stop the use of all of them. the side effects are not worth it! i was depressed, moody, sick and sore and to top it off my hair started falling out. i know this is little consolation, but the acne will pass soon enough and it will only be a memory.

[morrigan]

I'd suggest going to a dermatologist for other treatment options first. Birth control isn't exactly cheap, and it can cause hormone changes, weight gain, and moodiness. Some girls I've known, however, have had no side effects from taking the pill.

 

If you still don't find anything that works for your skin, try to get your mom to at least go to a Planned Parenthood and see about you taking the Pill for a trial period, to see if it actually could help you.

 

I can understand your mom's concern, but I'd like to think she'd be more realistic about you being responsible and not suddenly turning into a sex crazed bimbo the minute you're on birth control. On the other hand, prove to your mom that you are responsible and mature--don't run around with a new guy every week, and be intelligent and wait a couple of years before you have sex, and when you do, use both birth control and condoms.

[genie]

Are you all aware that there is a pill not only for birthcontrol it is for acne. It is Ortho Tri-cyclen. My daughter had acne and that alone can mess a child up with peer pressure and the insults from other kids. My daughter's dermatologist, which is a respectable doctor put my daughter on this pill and it worked miracles. She forgot about to take it one month and skipped the pills and her face somewhat broke out. My daughter does not take this for B.C., she merely wants her face to be as pretty as it is and can be. She actually has some scarring from not clearing up her face sooner. Shame on me.

 

I can remember when I was younger, about 20 years ago and started the pill, they did not want you on them for 2 years without taking a break. My OB said that it not the case now.

[dyermaker]

Originally posted by einahpets

birth control is meant for the use of preventing pregnany, not acne.

I think this is B.S.--The drug is prescribed for Acne as well. If you think we're overmedicated, just *DON'T* use the medications, but the rest of us would prefer to have our problems diagnosed and prescribed by a real doctor.

 

People on here are not qualified to tell you what's right for you, they're just not. Shame on your mother for ignoring the advice of a medical professional.

[murpfe]

You are using too much Retin-A your face is peeling as much as you say it is.

When used as prescribed you will surely get the results that you desire. Take it from one who used it for a few years. Is there an underlining reason you want to go on the pill? Do you have a boyfriend? If you do you are much too young to date. And you should not be having sex at 14.

 

Your mother is protecting you, she loves you and I can understand why she may be fearful that some smooth taking boy may compromise your morals. It is very possible that she trusts you, but remains skeptical about the boys your age. In years to come, you will understand her need to protect you, and thank God that she loved you enough to say no, when she knew she had to.

[dyermaker]

Oh my God!

 

People, leave medical advice to a DOCTOR. Anecdotal evidence is not good enough for this girl. You are not qualified to tell her whether or not she's using a drug correctly, she REACTED to the drug. That's when you STOP using the drug.

 

It's not about trusting boys to take advantage of her, it's DIRECTLY a reflection of her trust in her daughter. She has this convoluted idea that if her daughter's on the pill, she'll lose self-control.

[CurlyIam]

Dyer, the girl isn't even 15!

 

I'll tell you how was it when I was 15. The son of a family friend fancied me a lot. He was 4, maybe 5 years older. It was the summer before my going to highschool, he was going to the University. My dad adored him - I think he's the boyfriend my dad liked most.

 

We've been going out for 6 months, and I tell you I felt the pressure! Also let's say I was smarter for my age, was looking like a 17 years old, I was still 15!!!! I think being on the pill would have increased the pressure tremendously. I would have stood my ground, but it would have been much much more difficult!

 

Plus, dyer, even if you think that "the pill" is such a good answer, my mom's a doc. I have visited once a friend of her's at the hospital and they have a whole wing with women suffering from side effects. Yes, dyer, all they feet turned black - a problem with the circulation of blood. Plus some of them may impact brain activity (diane 35).

 

You are introducing a hormonal bombe inside your body! This a decision that she alone has to make when she is older, not her mother IMHO.

 

Plus this is only one option! What happened to the rest of them options? Why didn't she talk about the rest of them? and than only then compare the good points and the bad points of each alternative...

 

oh, Doo, rememeber that another side effect beside nausea, depression and possibly stomack ackes is that you gain weight!!!

[dyermaker]

Originally posted by CurlyIam

Dyer, the girl isn't even 15!

I didn't advocate her having sex.

 

Plus, dyer, even if you think that "the pill" is such a good answer

I didn't advocate her taking MY medical advice.

 

All I am saying is that this is a medical professional, who, unlike any of us, is familiar with different treatment options as well as his PATIENT's history.

 

I mean, here we have people saying, "You are using too much Retin-A your face is peeling as much as you say it is" in response to her detailing a medical reaction to a topical drug.

[CurlyIam]

I never said you were advocating her having sex!

 

What I meant by "she's not even 15" is that once the gets on the pill, should her bf find out, it's gonna be much difficult for her to say no!

 

People on here are not qualified to tell you what's right for you, they're just not.

 

I agree to that, but they can tell from their own experience what worked on them and how it has been working.

 

Shame on your mother for ignoring the advice of a medical professional.

 

Well, maybe Doo could go see another doctor. It's hard for me to believe that in America, you have only 2 alternatives for acnea!

[kirkyswife]

I battled acne as a teenager and periodically as an adult and was offered "birth control" as a an option for adult acne. I consulted with dermatologists and consistently received the following "frustratingly ineffective" formula for controlling acne:

 

1. DRINK LOTS OF WATER

2. Wash your face 3 times a day

3. Keep your hands off your face

4. Reduce intake of greasy foods

5. And whatever medicine they were experimenting with at that time

 

I have come to learn through trial and error that my body builds up a tolerance to the meds prescribed rendering them quite unsuccessful after a 3 month regime and I found I was back at square one and more frustrated than before.

 

I have tried 8 different birth control prescriptions over the past 14 years and still I was unable to get control of this annoying situation.

 

So here is what I offer you as alternatives to your "acne" problem:

 

Least Expensive Options (includes initial & maintenance)

 

Kaiser Permenante has Acne Wash and Benzoil Peroxide (BPO) that dry out the oily t zone areas and by alternating between the 5% and 10% BPO acne gels I was able to control the outbreaks. The cost for these meds - member or not is $5 for the wash and $5 for the BPO tubes - only available at Kaiser Permanente Pharmacy

Neutrogena Acne & Poor Refining Systems - available at local drug stores and ranges in price from $5.99 for on the spot BPO to $15.00+ for Pore Refining

 

Moderately Priced (includes initial & maintenance)

- Dermalogica offers a skin care system that is tailored to meet your skin issues. Similar to Clinique - Dermalogica is the full monty and the products leave your face feeling clean. You can find Dermalogica at Nordstrom, Macy's, Hair Salons and via the internet. Start up package is about $45

 

A Tad Pricey but BY FAR THE MOST EFFECTIVE

ProActive Solutions - approximately $59.00 for starter kit and then $59.00 every 60 days. This product works - you break out at first for a few days nd when I say a few days I mean a few days but then your skin takes on a glow and your acne disappears and you are able to manage it through this very wonderful system.

 

NOW if you have tried all of these and they don't work Then and only then would I follow the OB/GYN's advice and try hormone control.

 

But I honestly think that you're trying to get the pill because you are interested in having sex (if you haven't already) and wanted to run this story by us to see if your "story" would fly.

 

Whatever the reason, good luck!

[CurlyIam]

Thanks a lot for GREAT information, girl! I think you've hit the nail in the head at the end of the post !

[CurlyIam]

My boyfriend uses L'Oreal's Pure Zone and he said it had done wonders - he has a very sensitive skin. And the secret is not to skip any of the three phases!

[dyermaker]

Originally posted by CurlyIam

What I meant by "she's not even 15" is that once the gets on the pill, should her bf find out, it's gonna be much difficult for her to say no!

You shouldn't be in a relationship with someone who would put you in a position where you don't want to put yourself.

[CurlyIam]

Riiight!

 

It's not that he puts me in that position, dyer... it's about being a teen, having hormones that scream inside you, having a bf who's going through the same and what do you know, she just happens to be on the pill... what do you think it's gonna happen?

 

I was a very veeery good kid, but still, I'm a bit ashamed to remember my wild days as a teen.

 

Bottom line: this is not about not giving in to the pressures of the guy, it's about not giving in to the temptation of starting your sex life! It's also about fighting you yourself this temptation. Taking the pill everyday has also a psychologycal effect.

[dyermaker]

You're saying that the pill effects her self-control. Ergo, it has nothing to do with the pill, and everything to do with HER and her choices.

 

In fact, a large number of women have sex drive problems when going on the pill.

http://my.webmd.com/content/article/84/98116.htm

 

The bottom line is, if she's going to have sex, she's going to have sex.

 

I'll ignore your shot in the dark that this is her excuse for having sex, and give the poster the benefit of the doubt.

 

Here's an article for your mom, from a female gynecologist:

http://www.ivillagehealth.com/experts/womens/qas/0,,166936_153929-1,00.html

[CurlyIam]

On that article, the woman asking wheather her daugher should use BC pill said:

 

My daughter is 14 and has been on several antibiotics for acne since the age of 11.

 

That's how it's done, check out the alternatives, not jump on the pill!

 

Plus, the doc says:

 

Although all birth control pills can help fight acne, only one (Ortho TriCyclen) has gone through the FDA process to be able to state that its formulation helps prevent and treat acne.

 

 

I doubt you have any idea about the trasformation that a woman body undergoes when on the pill. Think: if one of the side effects is to prevent acnea, what about the others? For this is a side effect, it's purpose is not preventing acnea but preventing unwanted pregnancies.

 

 

But that's not the point. The point, IMO, is: the pill is the ultimate solution that one must consider, only if the rest of the alternatives don't work. For health reasons primarily!

 

 

Furthermore, I don't think either of us is a specialist in teen age psychology, so I'll stop making suppositions regardingwhat pushes teenagers to start having sex. Just like you said on your post on "the parents", it is vary easy to believe that one makes its' own decision, when in fact, they are not!

[dyermaker]

Originally posted by CurlyIam

That's how it's done, check out the alternatives, not jump on the pill!

You're not qualified to say "how it's done". You know neither her medical history, what medications she's on, etc.

I doubt you have any idea about the trasformation that a woman body undergoes when on the pill. Think: if one of the side effects is to prevent acnea, what about the others? For this is a side effect, it's purpose is not preventing acnea but preventing unwanted pregnancies.

That's medically incorrect--A primary effect of a drug is what it's being prescribed for. Any other effect is a side effect. If Orthotricyclen is prescribed for the threatment of acnea, it's side effect is the hormonal changes that may include protection from pregnancy.

But that's not the point. The point, IMO, is: the pill is the ultimate solution that one must consider, only if the rest of the alternatives don't work. For health reasons primarily!

My point was that medical decisions are between one and one's doctor, not one and an unqualified open discussion forum.

[CurlyIam]

You're not qualified to say "how it's done". You know neither her medical history, what medications she's on, etc

 

She did not say: I've been on antibiotics,they didn't work, I want to start the pill! Ergo, she does not have a medical history, or else she wpuld have said so in the beginning!

 

 

A primary effect of a drug is what it's being prescribed for. Any other effect is a side effect

 

My point exactly!

 

Orthotricyclen is prescribed for the threatment of acnea, it's side effect is the hormonal changes that may include protection from pregnancy.

 

I said the pill, not Orthotricyclen. Plus Orthotricyclen is a BC pill, make no mistake about it!

 

http://ashevillelist.com/birth-control-methods/orthotricyclen-pill.htm

 

My point was that medical decisions are between one and one's doctor, not one and an unqualified open discussion forum.

 

If I were to take your point of view a little further, every problem between two people is a matter of the two of them exclusively and they should not come on the shack! Thus, we wouldn't need or have the Shack!

 

Your point is interesting though, because as you have observed, this is definately NOT about acnea, is about a 15 years old wanting to go on the PILL. I say NO WAY!