NigellaObsidia Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 I'm divorced. There's a divorced man at my church who *seems* to be interested, but sometimes seems not to be. He'll greet me warmly, ask about my work, kids, etc, share about his work, kids, interests, etc (his kids are in college, I have one in college, one teen), I've caught him looking at me many times. Our conversations are not just small-talk. But there are times where I'll see him watching me or looking at me and I'll think maybe he'll come over and chat, but he doesn't. He just leaves without speaking to anyone. What is this? Shyness? Fear? Am I that ugly/smelly/repulsive? Guys, what do you think? I'll admit I'm not great at picking up cues, and my coworkers think he likes me, given they have more details I've shared with them than what I want to type out here. Anyone? Link to post Share on other sites
HokeyReligions Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 The only way you will know is to ask him. Just say something in a casual light tone like "I saw you looking at me the other day but you didn't stop to say Hi. Did I offend you somehow?" or "are you doing OK?" Ask the source - its the only way to know. Maybe he's reading something else into the glances/looks from you too. Link to post Share on other sites
RedRedMe Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 A lot of times when people send mixed signals it is because they aren't sure of what they want. How long has he been divorced? Could he have a hard time moving on? How old is your teen? Perhaps he has reservations about being a father like that again. Is he too busy with work or perhaps he has issues he feels he needs to work on before he can open up to someone. The possibilities are endless. If he is interested, then he appears to have some reservations. He keeps talking to you which indicates that you aren't stinky... lol. Sit down and think about why he might be concerned - more than likely it is personal and is not a reaction specifically to you. Be confident. And like the other poster said, the source is the best person to ask. Ask him to grab some brunch or a drink and see what happens. The worst scenario is he says "no, thanks" and you can move on. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NigellaObsidia Posted September 15, 2011 Author Share Posted September 15, 2011 A lot of times when people send mixed signals it is because they aren't sure of what they want. How long has he been divorced? Could he have a hard time moving on? How old is your teen? Perhaps he has reservations about being a father like that again. Is he too busy with work or perhaps he has issues he feels he needs to work on before he can open up to someone. The possibilities are endless. If he is interested, then he appears to have some reservations. He keeps talking to you which indicates that you aren't stinky... lol. Sit down and think about why he might be concerned - more than likely it is personal and is not a reaction specifically to you. Be confident. And like the other poster said, the source is the best person to ask. Ask him to grab some brunch or a drink and see what happens. The worst scenario is he says "no, thanks" and you can move on. That makes sense--I mean about having reservations. He has two sons in college, I have one son in college and my daughter is a freshman in hs. That could be an issue, I suppose. Well, I'll just keep on regular and see what happens. If I feel it's getting too confusing or weird, I'll ask him what's up. Thanks for both responses. Link to post Share on other sites
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