LittleTiger Posted September 20, 2011 Share Posted September 20, 2011 Does this make sense? Absolutely! You must do what you feel is right for you. Hope it all goes well whatever you decide to wear. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 2far Posted September 27, 2011 Author Share Posted September 27, 2011 Ok I am doing it! We had another conversation that left me kind of empty – I don’t know what will happen. But I am trying to do proactive. I’ll wear the white dress and bring a shawl – it is really skimpy on top! My idea is to take a picture of the shawl, my shoes, and my jewelry and send it to him saying ”I will wear this and one more item” At least I’ll be able to tell myself that I left my comfort zone … Link to post Share on other sites
LittleTiger Posted September 27, 2011 Share Posted September 27, 2011 Tell me to mind my own business 2far but I have alarm bells ringing in my ears! You say you guys had a conversation that left you kind of empty and you don't know what will happen? Then you say you're going to 'do proactive' and 'leave your comfort zone'? Forgive me if I'm wrong but I'm starting to sense some coercion here. What exactly is going on behind the scenes? What are you hoping to achieve? If you're just wanting to turn on the 'sex kitten' look for a bit of fun with your boyfriend (and you're doing it because you really want to) that's one thing.......if, however, you are doing it to get his attention, to hang on to him, to prove a point or to heal some of kind of rift between you, you might be setting yourself up for a nasty fall. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 2far Posted September 27, 2011 Author Share Posted September 27, 2011 You are probably right – but I want to do something, this may all blow up but at least that is something Also secretly it is an excuse to feel attractive and sexual – guys are attracted to me but I always feel guilty when they look at me – I have a boyfriend after all Link to post Share on other sites
Mundy Posted October 3, 2011 Share Posted October 3, 2011 You are the one who knows which outfit suits you best and which goes along with your body.you don't have to wear something you are not comfortable with.you need to look your best and be sexy. Adult chat Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky_One Posted October 3, 2011 Share Posted October 3, 2011 Ditch the shawl. You aren't 75. Wear a simple cardigan, or maybe even a pashmina. But old ladies wear shawls! Cardigan is far more fashionable for a woman your age. Personally, I am always cold in planes or in airports. I would wear something that makes you comfortable to travel in, and put on a garter belt and stockings. Then when you are in the car, just let your hemline slide up a bit and reveal a glimpse. No need to tease or anything else - just let him be excited to see you for the trip because you are YOU and because he has missed you, and then blow his mind with anticipation at that point. Go to a Victoria's Secret or an actual lingerie shop (depending on country you are in - sorry I didn't notice). If you can get your nerve up, explain to the salesgirl what you need, and she will help you with the fit and the best way to wear whatever you pick out. If you aren't comfortable with a garter belt, then try a sexy teddy with just a skirt and a buttoned cardigan, so the lace top of the teddy peeks out. BUT I am with Tiger here. Do this only if YOU want to do this. Trying to become something you are not in order to keep or entice a man isn't a good idea for a strong relationship. Exploring your own boundaries is fine, as long as someone isn't forcing you to cross your own lines. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 Ok I am doing it! We had another conversation that left me kind of empty – I don’t know what will happen. But I am trying to do proactive. I’ll wear the white dress and bring a shawl – it is really skimpy on top! My idea is to take a picture of the shawl, my shoes, and my jewelry and send it to him saying ”I will wear this and one more item” At least I’ll be able to tell myself that I left my comfort zone … This worries me, it really does. I'm all for people having fun during reunions but this doesn't sound like fun at all. You sound like you're trying to dress sexy to save a relationship, to prevent the empty conversations. But it doesn't. And if it did, the relationship would not be worth keeping, would it? Anyhow, if you have your heart set on it, I second the person who said there is a restroom at the terminal. Garter belts and heels on a long flight will probably make you very uncomfortable if you aren't used to them. Link to post Share on other sites
LDR234 Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 I would definitely go with the second dress and wait till the end of the flight to change in the bathroom. I always find it cold on the plane. That dress sounds awesome...heh, where did you get it Link to post Share on other sites
LDR234 Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 I do like that white shirt idea with the black vest on top without the bra. I was going to wear a regular t-shirt and short skirt to pick my bf at the airport, now I'm going to be changing it to a thin tight white tank with black vest and white skirt. thanks for the suggestion! Link to post Share on other sites
Author 2far Posted October 6, 2011 Author Share Posted October 6, 2011 I did it even though some of you had justified concerns. I wore a white summer dress with a blue pattern light rayon material. It comes down to a couple of inches above the knee. It is backless except for a 1 inch strap going up the middle, the strap splits behind the neck. The front has a V cut. It covers my breasts but gives a hint of cleavage. The front is slightly loose and when I move it can expose something – down the front or on the sides. I also brought a shawl / scarf for the flight. I wore nothing else and told my BF that I’d wear only shoes, jewelry and one item. I felt very excited when I left. At the airport I immediately realized that the dress attracts attention _ I got lots of looks – which made me a little uncomfortable but also added to the thrill. Flight was uneventful – but I got lots of looks getting in and out. He waited at the luggage belt – right before I met him I put the scarf in my purse. I was so excited – this was the most daring thing I have ever done. When he saw me he started crying – completely different reaction than expected. He hugged me and told me that I am beautiful and that he was sorry about not being attentive. We drove to his place I was very turned on – and the night was really special, I think the skimpy dress, the looks, and the nervousness really turned me on. I stayed for 3 more nights and the physical part was great, except for the last night. But we started have some tension as the time progressed – and I am not sure where we stand. I think he hangs out with other women (but does not cheat in the technical sense) and feels guilty about me. So I am back to square one Link to post Share on other sites
LittleTiger Posted October 6, 2011 Share Posted October 6, 2011 What exactly is 'square one'? You've hinted at problems in your relationship and given us the impression you were hoping that 'stepping out of your comfort zone' with the white dress and no underwear would somehow solve them. Although you clearly enjoyed the experience it obviously hasn't solved anything. Maybe we can give you some helpful advice if you tell us what's really going on? Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted October 7, 2011 Share Posted October 7, 2011 Oh, hon. Reading your last few sentences, I'm beginning to have an idea of what the problem is, though I can't be sure. Were you really expecting a sexy outfit to change all that? It really doesn't. Not for the long term anyway. Sexy outfits are fun things for couples to do, like a movie night or a fancy dinner... but they never solve core relationship issues. Perhaps we could tackle the problem from the start instead? Link to post Share on other sites
Author 2far Posted October 7, 2011 Author Share Posted October 7, 2011 Yes, you are right the sexy outfit was fun but of course it cannot fix the bigger issues. I am not sure where to begin describing my / our issues. I do not have much relationship experience. I feel that he is a great guy but I also sense that he is not sure if I am the one for him. I know that he is attracted to me and that was part of my attraction to him initially. I think I am fairly attractive but I am tense and come across as serious and high strung. So when this guy was clearly attracted to me it somehow made him appealing. He is a nice guy and likes me but I think he thinks that I am not right for the long run. I told him that we don’t have to decide whether we’ll get married but just live today but I feel that he keeps distance. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 2far Posted October 9, 2011 Author Share Posted October 9, 2011 I just got of the phone. I think he is trying to break up with me. Link to post Share on other sites
LittleTiger Posted October 9, 2011 Share Posted October 9, 2011 I just got of the phone. I think he is trying to break up with me. 2far, I'm really, really sorry but I honestly think he got what he wanted when you went to visit him and now he's looking for 'fresh meat'. We don't know much about your relationship with this man but it was obviously short-lived - and yet you mentioned the word 'marriage'! That's another reason he may currently be running for the hills. I hope you weren't too attached to him. If you were, then I'm sorry if he hurt you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 2far Posted October 9, 2011 Author Share Posted October 9, 2011 I know you are right and I knew that it would end – but I liked that he was into me and that he was attracted to me. When others looked at me during my trip he became less important – I think… _ I think I need to find self-confidence and believe that I am attractive. The thing is, I know that I am attractive but at the same time I am very insecure about it. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted October 10, 2011 Share Posted October 10, 2011 Hon... You don't need to wear backless minidresses with nothing underneath to be seen as attractive by the right men!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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